The HunterSThompson guide to studying for the MCAT

[HunterSThompson]

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3:00 p.m. rise
3:05 Chivas Regal with the morning flash cards, Dunhills
3:45 cocaine
3:50 another glass of Chivas, Dunhill
4:05 first cup of coffee, Dunhill
4:15 cocaine
4:16 orange juice, Dunhill
4:30 cocaine
4:54 cocaine
5:05 cocaine
5:11 coffee, Dunhills, flash cards
5:30 more ice in the Chivas
5:45 cocaine, etc., etc.
6:00 grass to take the edge off the day
7:05 Kaplan Test Center, Bring lunch-Heineken, two margaritas, coleslaw, a taco salad, fried onion rings, carrot cake, ice cream, a bean fritter, Dunhills, another Heineken, cocaine, and for the ride home, a snow cone (a glass of shredded ice over which is poured three or four jiggers of Chivas)
9:00 starts snorting cocaine seriously
10:00 drops acid
11:00 Chartreuse, cocaine, grass, flash cards
11:30 cocaine, etc, etc.
12:00 midnight, HunterSThompson is ready to study seriously
12:05-6:00 a.m. Chartreuse, cocaine, grass, Chivas, coffee, Heineken, clove cigarettes, grapefruit, Dunhills, orange juice, gin, continuous pornographic movies.
6:00 the hot tub-champagne, Dove Bars, fettuccine Alfredo
8:00 Halcyon, flash cards
8:20 sleep

 

[medic86]

We have an MCAT forum for threads such as these.

 

[md-2020]

Clearly you have not yet mastered the art of trolling, HunterSThompson.

Perhaps I should write a guide on that for you.

 

[Ovid]

3:00 p.m. rise
3:05 Chivas Regal with the morning flash cards, Dunhills
3:45 cocaine
3:50 another glass of Chivas, Dunhill
4:05 first cup of coffee, Dunhill
4:15 cocaine
4:16 orange juice, Dunhill
4:30 cocaine
4:54 cocaine
5:05 cocaine
5:11 coffee, Dunhills, flash cards
5:30 more ice in the Chivas
5:45 cocaine, etc., etc.
6:00 grass to take the edge off the day
7:05 Kaplan Test Center, Bring lunch-Heineken, two margaritas, coleslaw, a taco salad, fried onion rings, carrot cake, ice cream, a bean fritter, Dunhills, another Heineken, cocaine, and for the ride home, a snow cone (a glass of shredded ice over which is poured three or four jiggers of Chivas)
9:00 starts snorting cocaine seriously
10:00 drops acid
11:00 Chartreuse, cocaine, grass, flash cards
11:30 cocaine, etc, etc.
12:00 midnight, HunterSThompson is ready to study seriously
12:05-6:00 a.m. Chartreuse, cocaine, grass, Chivas, coffee, Heineken, clove cigarettes, grapefruit, Dunhills, orange juice, gin, continuous pornographic movies.
6:00 the hot tub-champagne, Dove Bars, fettuccine Alfredo
8:00 Halcyon, flash cards
8:20 sleep

I think this is the first MCAT study plan I've seen where the OP may be better off not studying at all than following the plan.

 

[xc_stallion92]

Solid plan. I followed a similar one for my 529.

 

[HunterSThompson]

Guarantee you'll be happy if you use this guide

 

[tenblackalps]

3:00 p.m. rise
3:05 Chivas Regal with the morning flash cards, Dunhills
3:45 cocaine
3:50 another glass of Chivas, Dunhill
4:05 first cup of coffee, Dunhill
4:15 cocaine
4:16 orange juice, Dunhill
4:30 cocaine
4:54 cocaine
5:05 cocaine
5:11 coffee, Dunhills, flash cards
5:30 more ice in the Chivas
5:45 cocaine, etc., etc.
6:00 grass to take the edge off the day
7:05 Kaplan Test Center, Bring lunch-Heineken, two margaritas, coleslaw, a taco salad, fried onion rings, carrot cake, ice cream, a bean fritter, Dunhills, another Heineken, cocaine, and for the ride home, a snow cone (a glass of shredded ice over which is poured three or four jiggers of Chivas)
9:00 starts snorting cocaine seriously
10:00 drops acid
11:00 Chartreuse, cocaine, grass, flash cards
11:30 cocaine, etc, etc.
12:00 midnight, HunterSThompson is ready to study seriously
12:05-6:00 a.m. Chartreuse, cocaine, grass, Chivas, coffee, Heineken, clove cigarettes, grapefruit, Dunhills, orange juice, gin, continuous pornographic movies.
6:00 the hot tub-champagne, Dove Bars, fettuccine Alfredo
8:00 Halcyon, flash cards
8:20 sleep

C for effort. Unfortunately your major requires a C+ so we'll see you next semester.

 

[Cyberdyne 101]

0/10 and in b4 the lock

 

[maxwell_edison]

You missed the dexedrine.

 

[mehc012]

Are people just unfamiliar with Hunter S. Thompson (the real person), because with that as context, this is pretty spot-on high-larious!