To all you young future doctors: Will you be getting a prenupt?

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1. I am hesitant to actually get officially married because I disagree with the format, benefits, and connotations it has in the states.

2. Nope, no prenup...I won't have much (if any) in the way of assets when I get married. Even after med school/residency, I've got loans to pay off, man!

3. Wouldn't combine our finances anyway (aka joint tax return), cuz it would eff with my IBR levels!

4. Definitely not changing my name...but only because I have one of the best last names for a doctor ever, and I also managed to snag a Google Voice number incorporating it! :laugh:
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Wouldn't combine our finances anyway (aka joint tax return), cuz it would eff with my IBR levels!
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that doesn't accomplish anything in regards to a divorce.
 
SOMBound13 said:
that doesn't accomplish anything in regards to a divorce.
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Fair enough...hell, if you can sue for the full value of someone's "demonstrated income" (aka their illegally obtained *coughcoughdrugmoney* in a divorce, you can sue for the other.

I suppose the important aspect of this, however, is that I cannot see myself married to someone who stays at home and doesn't have their own career. They're going to have their own finances, and until my debt is paid off, they're likely going to have more financial stability than me. So what would they be suing me for in a divorce?

Now, if we have kids I can imagine they might stay at home...but there is absolutely zero chance I would let the kids go. I would quit medicine, give up all my money, whatever before I would lose the kids. So I won't ask for child support if they don't ask for alimony ;)

(Yes, I recognize that this is all a pipe dream of how a divorce would play out; but the important points are that my spouse would have an equivalent income and not 'sacrifice' it staying home, and that once kids enter the equation, I don't care how anything else in the divorce plays out)
 
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No prenup. My gf and I have plans to enter the medical field where money will be a non-issue once we finish, make lives for ourselves and help pay off loans. She is supportive of any sudden moves we may have to make. I offered her to keep her last name and she said no. She wants to make meals and keep the house clean. She isn't materialistic either.

She a keepuh ;)
 
Any pre-law kids on here to explain how a prenup would work b4 u make the big bucks?
 
Member 331305 said:
Only nine states use the community property system (Arizona, California, Idaho, Louisiana, Nevada, New Mexico, Texas, Washington, and Wisconsin).

Another reason to stick to the East coast.
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:laugh: Community property states offer protection to professionals in a divorce of non-equals (future earning power), otherwise anything goes. :eek: You could end up losing well more than half of the "community property".
 
plumazul said:
:laugh: Community property states offer protection to professionals in a divorce of non-equals (future earning power), otherwise anything goes. :eek: You could end up losing well more than half of the "community property".
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That's...why the person you quoted recommended not living in those states?
 
Dmr6186 said:
No prenup. My gf and I have plans to enter the medical field where money will be a non-issue once we finish, make lives for ourselves and help pay off loans. She is supportive of any sudden moves we may have to make. I offered her to keep her last name and she said no. She wants to make meals and keep the house clean. She isn't materialistic either.

She a keepuh ;)
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Funny thing about this is what if one of you does not make it to be a doctor? Usually if the girl doesnt make it, it's okay and she can just be a house wife. If the guy doesnt make it however, I can't see many female physicians who would be willing to just take care of a grown man. She'd probably be like "ok hit the road".
 
kgpremed11 said:
Funny thing about this is what if one of you does not make it to be a doctor? Usually if the girl doesnt make it, it's okay and she can just be a house wife. If the guy doesnt make it however, I can't see many female physicians who would be willing to just take care of a grown man. She'd probably be like "ok hit the road".
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From your post history I'm going to guess someone stole your lunch money one too many times as a kid.

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plumazul said:
:laugh: Community property states offer protection to professionals in a divorce of non-equals (future earning power), otherwise anything goes. :eek: You could end up losing well more than half of the "community property".
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Looks like I overlooked non-equal relationships. Correction: if you married a golddigger, stay on the West coast.
 
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Poor Oddish, never got a chance to evolve...
 
U mirin will be back.

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I'm starting med school next year and I am most definitely keeping my last name when I get married. Part of the reason is my significant other of 6 years has a last name that would be incredibly awkward to have as a doctor and partly because I don't see the point of changing my last name if he won't change his. I know a lot of women ask if it will bother me that our future kids won't have my last name but in this day and age I'm not worried about it. I know they're mine, they know they're loved, and that's all that matters. As far as finances I will someday make roughly four times what my husband will make as a high school teacher but since we've been together since we were 16 we know we're together for the right reasons. As far as taking care of the kids I'll work full-time so we'll do daycare during the school year and he is going to love playing golf everyday during his summers off. I'm just thankful we'll both have careers we're passionate about.
 
What about hyphenated names? Like Smith-Jones?

I've always wondered what happens when two males tie the knot? Do they keep their last name, or combine it?
 
I'm not opposed to hyphenated names but we both have long multiple-syllabic last names that don't go together. The gay couple I know that's married hyphenated their last names. I believe the older one has his surname first plus he has kids from a previous relationship.
 
MedPR said:
From your post history I'm going to guess someone stole your lunch money one too many times as a kid.

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:thumbup::thumbup: Agreed. Awfully jaded when it comes to being in a committed relationship. He has brought this up in multiple threads, too. Sounds like someone had their heart broken, so clearly marriage is just the worst thing ever. :laugh:

kgpremed11 said:
Funny thing about this is what if one of you does not make it to be a doctor? Usually if the girl doesnt make it, it's okay and she can just be a house wife. If the guy doesnt make it however, I can't see many female physicians who would be willing to just take care of a grown man. She'd probably be like "ok hit the road".
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Wow, you're sexist, too! I'm a female and I'd be perfectly fine with my husband being a stay-at-home dad (as long as we were financially able to have only 1 income).
 
Naw, im just a practical common sense type of guy, most people are scumbags though.
 
BuddyTheElf said:
Wow, you're sexist, too! I'm a female and I'd be perfectly fine with my husband being a stay-at-home dad (as long as we were financially able to have only 1 income).
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I don't think most women see anything inherently wrong with a stay-at-home guy, but guys in this position probably tend to lack comparable ambition/drive which tend to be attractive to most women. Awesome username/avatar by the way. I love Elf.
 
No prenupt for me. I like to live life on the edge.
 
BuddyTheElf said:
:thumbup::thumbup: Agreed. Awfully jaded when it comes to being in a committed relationship. He has brought this up in multiple threads, too. Sounds like someone had their heart broken, so clearly marriage is just the worst thing ever. :laugh:



Wow, you're sexist, too! I'm a female and I'd be perfectly fine with my husband being a stay-at-home dad (as long as we were financially able to have only 1 income).
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you say that now...but a very large number of females are fundamentally unattracted to men who don't bring in SOME income. I don't see very many women out here clamouring to get with all these laid-off and unemployed guys.

Saying women like men who fullfill some aspects of traditionally male gender roles is no different and no more sexist than saying men like women who are traditionally feminine.
 
I don't know if this has been said, but I think prenuptial agreements protect current assets and not future assets.
 
Lexdiamondz said:
you say that now...but a very large number of females are fundamentally unattracted to men who don't bring in SOME income. I don't see very many women out here clamouring to get with all these laid-off and unemployed guys.

Saying women like men who fullfill some aspects of traditionally male gender roles is no different and no more sexist than saying men like women who are traditionally feminine.
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Being feminine is different than fulfilling the traditional female gender roles.
 
MedPR said:
In some cultures its a sign of disrespect.

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Mind = blown.

These same cultures create egalitarian gems like Hyghmyron.

No thanks Jeff.
 
getting married the summer between years 1&2. No preupt.
 
cherahla said:
Mind = blown.

These same cultures create egalitarian gems like Hyghmyron.

No thanks Jeff.
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Not sure what to make of this. Either you are anti-civil rights or you don't know what egalitarian means.
 
HughMyron said:
The difference is that our culture is patrilineal. So I'm not the one rocking the boat, she is. If you want to screw things up, you better have a damn good reason. "I depend on my name in my career as a lawyer" is a good reason. "I'm not switching my name because I don't feel like it" is not.
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The misogyny is strong with this one.

cherahla said:
Mind = blown.

These same cultures create egalitarian gems like Hyghmyron.

No thanks Jeff.
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Mind = blown.
 
MedPR said:
Not sure what to make of this. Either you are anti-civil rights or you don't know what egalitarian means.
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I think he was using "egalitarian" sarcastically, but in any case he picked the wrong person to judge an entire culture on.
 
kgpremed11 said:
Funny thing about this is what if one of you does not make it to be a doctor? Usually if the girl doesnt make it, it's okay and she can just be a house wife. If the guy doesnt make it however, I can't see many female physicians who would be willing to just take care of a grown man. She'd probably be like "ok hit the road".
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Anyone wanna donate some stats on the divorce rate for docs vs the general public? I feel like some people get SO caught up in their career (ie us SDN'ers, myself included) that we forget what this life is all about.
 
MedPR said:
Being feminine is different than fulfilling the traditional female gender roles.
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true, but the overlap is significant, and I think to most men a mix of both is important, and vice-versa for women.
 
kgpremed11 said:
Funny thing about this is what if one of you does not make it to be a doctor? Usually if the girl doesnt make it, it's okay and she can just be a house wife. If the guy doesnt make it however, I can't see many female physicians who would be willing to just take care of a grown man. She'd probably be like "ok hit the road".
Click to expand...

If one of us doesn't make it to our target career goal, then there will be another career goal to take its place. In a normal world, people adjust. In yours, it's either all or nothing :confused: If you're so full of common sense you wouldn't have said this because you're implying that one partner will be the breadwinner and the other a total deadbeat? Yeah, totally realistic in all cases :rolleyes:
 
circulus vitios said:
I don't know if this has been said, but I think prenuptial agreements protect current assets and not future assets.
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:thumbup: Yep, it was talked about on the first page I think.

Honestly, I'm just hoping my future wife doesn't pre-nup me. I'd imagine she wouldn't want any part of that student loan debt.
 
Dmr6186 said:
If one of us doesn't make it to our target career goal, then there will be another career goal to take its place. In a normal world, people adjust. In yours, it's either all or nothing :confused: If you're so full of common sense you wouldn't have said this because you're implying that one partner will be the breadwinner and the other a total deadbeat? Yeah, totally realistic in all cases :rolleyes:
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Biology degree without, MD or DO equals phd or Mickey'Ds. In most cases the phd will still go to work at Mc'D's when they finish.


Something good happened to me today, I was outside of Walmart and my car battery died. So a woman walks up ( im assuming she heard my engine sputter) and said, "do you need some help?" I didnt even have to ask her. So she gave me a boost and I made it to class on time to take my exam. In reflection of this, I guess all people arn't scumbags, but still a lot of them are.
 
kgpremed11 said:
Biology degree without, MD or DO equals phd or Mickey'Ds. In most cases the phd will still go to work at Mc'D's when they finish.


Something good happened to me today, I was outside of Walmart and my car battery died. So a woman walks up ( im assuming she heard my engine sputter) and said, "do you need some help?" I didnt even have to ask her. So she gave me a boost and I made it to class on time to take my exam. In reflection of this, I guess all people arn't scumbags, but still a lot of them are.
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So it is required that people go out of their way to help you for you not to consider them a scumbag? Perhaps living in the midwest has given my a rose-colored outlook, but I would be very sad if I automatically assumed the worst of most people.
 
kgpremed11 said:
Biology degree without, MD or DO equals phd or Mickey'Ds. In most cases the phd will still go to work at Mc'D's when they finish.


Something good happened to me today, I was outside of Walmart and my car battery died. So a woman walks up ( im assuming she heard my engine sputter) and said, "do you need some help?" I didnt even have to ask her. So she gave me a boost and I made it to class on time to take my exam. In reflection of this, I guess all people arn't scumbags, but still a lot of them are.
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I'm not really sure what your first paragraph means. PhD's will work at McDonald's? Where do you see this happening? Do you hold a Phd and work at one?

Instead of assuming all people are scumbags until they go out of their way for your highness, how about you assume all people are good until they prove to you otherwise?

3pv042.jpg
 
Dmr6186 said:
I'm not really sure what your first paragraph means. PhD's will work at McDonald's? Where do you see this happening? Do you hold a Phd and work at one?

Instead of assuming all people are scumbags until they go out of their way for your highness, how about you assume all people are good until they prove to you otherwise?

3pv042.jpg
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:thumbup:
 
Jesus, the mods are uptight nowadays, I just got a private message threating to suspend my account. Im a nice neutral guy wtf are they talking about.
 
kgpremed11 said:
Jesus, the mods are uptight nowadays, I just got a private message threating to suspend my account. Im a nice neutral guy wtf are they talking about.
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:corny:

In (again)

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kgpremed11 said:
Jesus, the mods are uptight nowadays, I just got a private message threating to suspend my account. Im a nice neutral guy wtf are they talking about.
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I'm not sure publically criticizing them is going to help your case...
 
kgpremed11 said:
Jesus, the mods are uptight nowadays, I just got a private message threating to suspend my account. Im a nice neutral guy wtf are they talking about.
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So what does that make them?
 
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