Hi cal687,
In terms of safety I have always felt generally safe in the Mission by day, and at night the only place I feel uncomfortable is on Mission itself around 16th if I'm alone. Over closer to Dolores and Guerrero though it's fine (I was at 18th and Guerrero for ~2 years, 15th and Guerrero for a year and 18th and on Duboce and Church behind the Safeway on Market for 2 years). Duboce Triangle/Castro is safe day or night to me and lower Haight can be questionable at night alone. If anything the Mission has become safer over the last 5-10 years due to fairly rampant gentrification. In fact when I was out to interviewing I went out that night with some friends over to the mission and the castro and was surprised how much the mission has gotten cleaned up. I will say though that everyone's idea of safety is different and I acclimatize to urban neighborhoods pretty quick. When I was at 15th and Guerrero I was actually diagonal from some rough projects (since changed), and didn't really mind, though a flatmate got mugged three times (in broad daylight
)?!?
Now that I think about it, I had a friend who grew up in Diamond Heights/Glenn Park neighborhood and it always seemed nice and sunny over there, and very quiet and more family oriented. Also Noe Valley is sunny and very safe with quite a few nice restaurants and shops and stuff, and still close to a lot of stuff.
My feeling is that if you stay east of the hills it's sunny. I remember watching the fog sit up on Buena Vista park everyday and knowing that everything west was chilly. So I think choosing the Sunset or the Richmond can mean permanent fog. On the other hand the Sunset tends to be probably much safer and quieter than other parts of the city, and the beach isn't far away.
In terms of transport, from Castro/Duboce Triangle/Mission the N-Judah line is totally safe and clean and I think it stops one block below Parnassus; I used to ride it about every other day going downtown or up Market. I always think the MUNI trains are better than the MUNI buses. That being said I had some friends who never ride on either, but then they also spent 3 hours looking for parking everywhere.
I'm still not sure where to live honestly. If I get into Mission Bay, then I'll take it. But otherwise I'm going to be trying to find a place which will take a dog which is tough (Mission Bay doesn't allow pets, but a friend who lives in SOMA has offered to keep her for a year).. I'll definitely look in Duboce Triangle/Castro/Mission first, but who knows.. Also up in the air is whether my partner will be able to move this fall or not, since that will determine whether I'm looking for a studio or a larger/nicer place. It's a question of finding the right job and that might take a while.
Oh, and I was actually in the afternoon session on 2/2. I think it was all out of state people that afternoon!