Taking Physicians Hill
We start out about 100,000 strong. An Army of eager Army of Pre-med soldiers with a mission?take Physicians Hill. The mission is a long one. The longest and most arduous of its kind. General Reality sends his very best warriors after this prize.
He pre-briefed us on the dangers (but as always, some of us did not pay attention).
"Soldiers. You must cross the minefield, traverse the river, climb the wall, and avoid the gunfire you will experience on the other side. Once you clear the wall, you will get close air support. You must then charge the hill. There will be a barbed wire fence, and halfway up the enemy has dug a trench, don?t get caught in the trench! Once you clear the trench, the hill gets very steep. Hang in there! Most of you won?t make it to the top. Some of you will. Good Luck and Godspeed."
We start across the minefield. Right away I begin to see people being blown away. The financial aid mines make a eerie whine as they explode sending bodies flying home. A few misbehavior mines send whole platoons packing. Before we even make it to the River, our ranks are cut to 75%. Many of those that are left are injured by the small Global Platoon Assault (GPA) mines.
Now we come to the River. The current is strong. I watch as our numbers continue to dwindle as the weary and injured soldiers get swept downstream. Some make landfall at the less demanding Attorney?s Hill and Mount Bucks Arsenal (MBA) Hill, others are swept off into oblivion. By the time we make it to the other side we are down to 60% of our original strength, but we are more determined than ever.
We make it to the other side and we are faced with something we all expected?The Wall. The side of the wall has a message painted in big red letters "Medical Corps Ambition Terminator". We stand in awe of the dreaded MCAT.
With a harrowing scream, we charge the wall. We ascend the wall with determination and fear. Once we get to the top, we realize the only way down is to jump. The gung-ho among us meet this fate with grim determination. "AAARGH!!!" They scream as they leap to the ground. Before I know it I am being pushed to the ground by the wave of leaping warriors.
We stop to catch our breath. The hill stands off in the distance. We can finally see it! We look around at ourselves and there are injuries galore. There are only about 37,000 of us left now. Some of us were broken by the MCAT others were hampered by the GPA, but we were all eager to press on. We sat fearful awaiting the close air support, but before it arrived, the application process tanks began rolling in.
Before we knew what was happening about 7,000 of us were gunned out of the chase. The last few warriors were still making their way over the MCAT. Many of them were easy targets for the rejection gunfire.
We jumped to our feet and began charging toward the hill. The massacre was worse than ever. We could hear the screams and whines of our colleagues as they were destroyed by interview shrapnel and rejection gunfire. We watched as our friends got crushed by the application process tanks. It was horrible.
As we made it to the foot of the hill, we could hear the rumblings of our close air support coming in. We looked up and saw the squadron and medical staff and faculty jets come racing in laying waste to the application process tanks.
We waited as the jets finished off the last of the application process tanks. We were a proud few. There were less than 17,000 of us left now. Many of us were tired and scared. Others were proud and boastful. We knew that the most difficult part lied ahead, but we made it this far and we weren?t about to give up now. We knew we still had to pass the barbed wire boards and the matching trench, but we were ready. We said a prayer, took a deep breath, and began counting down. THREE MONTHS, TWO MONTHS, ONE MONTH..."AAAAARGH!!!"
See you at the top of the hill.
Sheon
