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Wedding Ring + Wedding - Medical School

Discussion in 'Finance and Investment' started by PharMed2016, Jan 1, 2009.

  1. PharMed2016

    PharMed2016 Eternal Scholar
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    Just wondering, how much does one spend on a wedding ring as a student? Or a wedding for that matter?

    My own thoughts would be to spend between 1-3k on a wedding ring but I want to hear everyone elses experiences with this. ***It's not a decision I'm making anytime soon but want to know for the eventuality.
     
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  3. ProLogic

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    Whatever you can afford. Or wait until after you start working as a Pharmacist.
     
  4. TMP-SMX

    TMP-SMX Senior Member
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    Not all ring prices are created equally. Costco has some pretty good value. It's up to you how much you want to spend/how many carats. A round stone will usually be cheaper than a princess cut. You can get wildly different prices depending on the gem clarity. Platinum will be more expensive than gold. Special outside accents will be more expensive rather than a single solitaire. You can also get a ring with more smaller, less expensive gems rather than one large one.
     
  5. michaelrack

    michaelrack All In at the wrong time
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    For someone in medical school, it's $1000 plus 1000 per your year in school, so

    2000 1st year
    3000 2nd year
    4000 3rd year
    5000 4 th year

    I guess you could subtract 500 for Pharm school


    I made these figures up, but I think they are pretty reasonable
     
  6. emtji

    emtji Senior Member
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    i spent about 4700 on a ring of the fiance's choosing during intern year last year. i have ~ 170k of debt from med school at a respectable interest rate. no regrets. wedding will be relatively cheap though....
     
  7. PharMed2016

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    Unfortunately, I think my GF wants atleast a 10k ring. It's still too early but I don' suppose I can hack it with a cheap one and then makeup with a nice one when I can afford it somewhere down the line?
     
  8. PharMed2016

    PharMed2016 Eternal Scholar
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    I like your avatar! lol, where did you find it?
     
  9. TMP-SMX

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    10k? You can buy a lot of diamond for that amount. I think you should limit it to 5k. Unless you have a large income that's not going to work. How much does she want? You should set your limit buy stone size and not price.

    I don't remember. I think I just saw the image somewhere and made it into an avatar. Some other people have the same avatar.
     
  10. bjackrian

    bjackrian Senior Member
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    Seriously, not to sound melodramatic, but it would make me nervous if my wife had demanded a particular dollar value for a wedding/engagement ring. If you can afford it, great, but this is not a good time to be going into huge amounts of debt when you're already (I assume) burdened with tons of student loans. To me, your idea of starting small now and buying more expensive things when you're actually making money is completely reasonable. If your GF won't accept a lesser-value ring at this point, I would think long and hard about whether it's truly worth it and what she's looking out for.
     
    dentalgirl101 likes this.
  11. ProLogic

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    If I end up going to Med school, I don't even plan to propose until I'm doing residency, have a place to put her, and financially stable.
     
  12. cpants

    cpants Member
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    I would feel so stupid buying my girlfriend a 10K dollar ring. Everyone knows either your parents bought it, or you borrowed the money. If she's that materialistic, run for it.
     
  13. Jolie South

    Jolie South is invoking Domo. . .
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    This is going to sound crazy, but there are options as far as getting a great setting with a fake stone and replacing with a real one later.

    I know several people that refuse to wear diamonds for political reasons, and they've gotten CZs instead. Their rings are awesome and look just as good as real ones. Plus, no need to worry if the ring gets lost or stolen. :)

    This website has some good stuff, and I've seen their work. The stones are cut like diamonds and are good quality. The settings are 14K gold. Your fiance could get one as big as she wants for less than $500. They also do custom. They're BBB accredited as well. Here's a review of their work.

    I'm not on their payroll or anything. :laugh:
     
    #12 Jolie South, Jan 4, 2009
    Last edited: Jan 4, 2009
  14. Sol Rosenberg

    Sol Rosenberg Long Live the New Flesh!
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    Agreed. If she is saying that she wants a particular $$ amount, I would run (or at least make sure that you get a prenup. She does get to keep the ring though, if you two do end up getting married....)
     
  15. JStephens

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    Then leave her ass. Requesting a specific dollar amount be spent on your ring is the number 1 sign of a gold digger. If she wants a 10K ring, tell you she can buy her own ring and you can buy your own ring, save yourself about 9500 dollars:scared:. I spent about 2K on my fiancee's ring (she's probably viewing this thread now and didn't know that...shoot me) and that was "too much". I think your g/f may have some screwed ideas of what is important in life, make sure they line up with your own before you say i do. Id hate to see you lose half + child support because she "wanted to marry a Dr. and be set for life" :mad:
     
    #14 JStephens, Jan 5, 2009
    Last edited: Jan 5, 2009
  16. dragonfly99

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    10k ring surely sounds excessive for ANY student to be buying.
    I concur with the above comments...I'd be worried about your future spouse's motivations if he/she is demanding a $10,000 ring from someone who is still a student. A couple thousand sounds reasonable to me at this point in your life.
     
  17. Member 870

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    The following is the absolute truth: When I got engaged, I bought my then fiancee a 1/5th carat diamond ring from Wal-Mart. Cost after taxes and shipping: a little over $200. I was a first year med-student and she knew that. When she found out it was from Wal-Mart she was a little bothered by it, but soon got over it. She loved me and knew it was foolish for me to spend thousands of dollars on something I couldn't afford. My recommendation is to spend what you can truly afford to spend. You don't have to buy your ring from Wal-Mart----JC Penney or Macy's have rings in the $500-$600 range if you want to splurge :laugh:
     
  18. Dancer1986

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    On a related note, do most people's parents pay for their weddings? I know we will not be able to afford the wedding we want until after I finish med school and residency in about 7 years and this is a very long time to be engaged! Especially when we have been dating 5 years already! My other question is would it be a good idea to use a loan like the residency relocation loan to help pay for the wedding during fourth year? Thanks!
     
  19. Sol Rosenberg

    Sol Rosenberg Long Live the New Flesh!
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    Most commonly, the bride's parents pay for the wedding.
     
  20. THP

    THP Senior Member
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    I spent $1200 on a ring when I was a junior in college 9 years ago. At the time I had no intention of medical school. Believe me, she will be so happy that she is getting married she won't care about the size of the ring. Then later she will wear it as a badge of honor reminding her of how little money you had when you were first starting a family.
     
  21. PharMed2016

    PharMed2016 Eternal Scholar
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    Thanks for the site... anniversary is coming up...

    ME = broke
     
  22. EUA

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    :laugh: Good luck with that!
     
  23. Dancer1986

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    Anyone else have any input for me?
     
  24. cpants

    cpants Member
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    Yes. More advice:

    1. Do not spend any more than 2500 dollars on a ring. Even that is a stretch considering every penny will be borrowed. If she is disappointed or dissatisfied with that your warning bells should be going crazy. Why would any person who loves you expect you to take on crippling debt just to put a flashy rock on her finger?

    2. It is traditional for the bride's family to pay for the wedding. Many families cannot afford this, or are simply breaking with tradition. So if you have to pay for the wedding yourselves...keep it very simple. Family, a few friends. We've all seen those wedding shows where they blow a quarter million on the party. That's not for you. Think backyard barbecue, beer and wine, and an iPod. Guess what? When you are a student you don't get to have the wedding you want. You get to have the wedding you can afford. As far as borrowing tons of money through ANY type of loan to throw the wedding: Horrible idea. What did you expect me to say?

    3. Consider growing up a little bit and making sure you are with the right person before you pop the question. You and your future spouse seem to be pretty clueless about responsible financial behavior, and this can be a huge stressor on a marriage. 50% of marriages end in divorce. Don't set yourself up to be part of that statistic, because you will be pretty pissed when you are still paying off the 100 grand you borrowed and your ex-wife is long gone.
     
  25. DOCTORSAIB

    DOCTORSAIB Ophtho or bust!
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    All this talk about wedding rings reminds me of a fav saying -- never forget, a woman depreciates the moment you marry her (unless she brings something to the table..i.e 6-figure salary, etc) :laugh:
     
  26. igotshoe

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    youll recoup a lot of money via wedding gifts, possibly making the wedding profitable.
     
  27. The White Coat Investor

    The White Coat Investor AKA ActiveDutyMD
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    The traditional rule is 2 months salary. For a med student that'd be $0. You could do 2 months living expenses if you like. I think I spent $2.5K as a college senior. Part of that was from money I got for donating plasma. You should spend enough that it is a little bit of a stretch, but not a huge stretch. If she wants a $10K ring you all need to wait at least until you're well into your residency.
     
  28. potato head

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    from what i've seen, this is not unusual.
     
  29. iheartmed

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    Hello,

    My husband and I were both in school when we were engaged/married. My ring was from the internet. We did a lot of research into the seller and I ended up with a brand new ring worth just over 10k that was everything they promised (diamond quality/clarity/size, conflict-free, gold quality). The total cost was just under $2000.

    Our wedding was in Vegas over the Christmas break. It was the absolute best thing we could have done. There was zero stress on the day and whoever was able to make it came. Everything was taken care of and the pictures and dinner were amazing. Because our wedding did take place away from home we had a wonderful reception in our home town on New Year's eve. It was so fabulous and fun and it was almost like I got two amazing weddings. We rented some large BBQs and hired cooks and a bartender. We served steak, chicken and had an open bar all night. We had 25 guests at the wedding and over 100 at the reception. Our total cost was about 10k.

    Here is the link to the place we used in Vegas. I was so shocked how elegant and inviting it was. The minister even blessed us with a beautiful poem. Have fun with it.

    http://www.theartisanhotel.com/weddings.php
     
  30. OldPsychDoc

    OldPsychDoc Senior Curmudgeon
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    The "traditional rule" is made up by DeBeers and is a pile of crap.
    Spend what ever you can afford that will convince her of your seriousness and commitment to the marriage now, and plan to upgrade (the ring, hopefully not the wife :D) later.
    I think I spent $300 as a college junior on a setting for an inherited 1/3 ct. stone. Admittedly that was 25 years ago but Mrs. PsychDoc never complained. (OMG--it WAS 25 yrs ago this March! It's probably a good time to upgrade soon--and maybe we'll get the original stone set in a new wedding band for me.)
     
  31. potato head

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    yeah, if you do a lot of research, you'll probably be able to get a good deal. a friend of mine found a beautiful >1.5 carat ring for somewhere between 7-8K.

    also, i'm not sure if this has been mentioned, but some (not all) girls like designer rings, like "tiffany" and "debeers." this will mark up your price significantly.

    and personally, i wouldn't go less than 1 carat.
     
  32. DrJD

    DrJD Junior Member
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    I consider myself lucky because my wife doesn't "believe" in diamonds. (She was an Econ major in undergrad and has strong feelings about cartels creating artificial value...) Anyway, we ended up getting matching wedding bands. Mine is a little thicker, and hers is thinner. We really like it because they match. They are white gold or whatever and I think we spend under $500 for both. We did it because its what we wanted, the finances were just a benefit.

    That being said, even if it isn't your first choice you could consider getting bands now and diamonds and what not later when you have more money!
     
  33. rnnpmaybe

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    Oh my, some of these figures! My engagement ring was $500 (a 1/2 carat, not the best clarity), my band?- A whopping $50 for a white gold band with inlaid diamonds (small, but they are there). We paid 10K (ourselves) for a relatively large, elegant wedding. We (err, I) did ALOT of research finding the best price -it's not easy, but well worth it.

    The ring/wedding is just not as important as the person you choose to give it to.

    A-Going into debt for a peice of jewelry when you're already so much in the whole with education loans is simply foolish.

    B-When you get married, the debt you acquired becomes her debt as well

    C-who NEEDS a 10K ring anway? I had an acquaintance who had a Tiffany ring that cost that much-it was just plain overkill.

    D- you can definitely upgrade when you have more money. Our plan is to purchase a larger diamond and have it set in the original ring. But that is a long time from now, and it still will not be anywhere near the aforementioned figures.
     
  34. Still Kickin

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    Wow, all this talk about such MASSIVE amounts of money for a ring... Makes my head spin!

    My hubby and I got married during my last year in college (which was 10+ years ago, btw). We were dirt poor and got matching wedding bands at Service Merchandise (I don't think that business even exists anymore?) for like 200-300 each. (They are nice substantial rings. I've seen some wedding bands that are very narrow or very thin (ie - distance from finger to outer edge of ring is very thin), but these are not like that.)

    I never had a diamond or an engagement ring, really the bands were already quite a "splurge" based on our finances at the time. I guess it's always been in the back of our minds that *maybe* it was something we could do *some day* when we could afford it, but frankly it kind of sounds silly to me now, we have much better things we need that money for! (Also - I used to work in a research lab and used my hands a lot and wondered if it was impractical to be wearing a huge rock, anyway [and/or if the ring would just get beat up from the type of work I was doing].) I have to say that my wedding band has a lot of microscopic scratches all over it (so the finish is not nearly as "shiny" as it was originally). I don't mind that, but if it were a 10K ring with all those micro-scratches, I think I'd feel really bad about the whole thing.

    (Having said all this - I *am* very fond of shiny things so if the right opportunity presents itself I'm not adverse to having a ring... At this point, I'm thinking maybe one of those diamond anniversary bands might be nice at some point. [It seems kind of silly buying an "engagement"-style ring after so many years, and I *still* wonder about the practicality of a "big rock" knocking into things]...)
     
  35. foil

    foil Junior Member
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    ( Unfortunately, I think my GF wants atleast a 10k ring.)
    :eek::eek::eek:


    Sir,
    I believe you choose the wrong gal.............What more will she want after the marriage?
    You should be saving your money for a Nicer home, in that better neighborhood.
    Wait till you've landed a terrific job before tying the knot.

    Give her a tattoo ring...........suppose to be forever right?
     
  36. PharMed2016

    PharMed2016 Eternal Scholar
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    Lol, I read an article about removable tatoos nowadays. I guess no more "forever". Although, I have to say... I personally don't believe in divorce.

    As for what more she wants? Well... a nice lexus, a big home by the lakefront..., a golden german sheperd, ... need I say more? :scared: However, wants are not reflective of reality. I know that I'm going to be nearly 40 before I pay off most of my debt so I'm not looking to add anymore if I can help it.
     
  37. error404

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    A lot more important than the actual cash value of the ring is the time you put into it.

    I don't do diamonds. Neither does my husband. He surprised me by tracking down an extremely rare stone from a long-closed fair-trade north american mine. It took him a year of work without me knowing, talking with over 20 gemologists and 100 distributors. He also worked with 4 jewelers on the setting. He read books. (Now I've read them too.)

    Now, that being said, I ended up with a gem quality stone (whereas Tiffany's and such only sell commercial grade,) which cost more than anything that's been mentioned in this thread. But the time and attention to detail are what really matter.

    Alternatively, the sentimental approach, such as giving a ring that's been in your family, also means a lot to us chicks.
     
  38. WnderWmn10

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  39. ChiDO

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  40. Southpaw

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    #39 Southpaw, Feb 13, 2009
    Last edited: Feb 22, 2009
  41. chewsnuffles

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    Man, you are lucky! There have been two girls that I have ever dated where wedding rings came up, and both times I let it slip that technically diamonds are worthless and in the post-appocalyptic future, all that money we spent on a diamond ring would really be wasted...

    Now if she wanted a gold chain around her neck, well, that's an investment...

    Needless to say, the looks I got after that were not pretty at all...

    I've resigned myself to probably spending 5-8k on a ring... (yeah, I feel like I'm selling out on my econ side, but screw it...)
     
  42. mededu

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    I know you would be really excited, but it would be wise if you can see how much you can practically afford for it and then proceed accordingly...
     
  43. Grif

    Grif Crazy About Psychology
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    I am very lucky, my GF wanted to know how much I was going to spend on her "Bday present" to make sure I wasn't spending too much. She thinks diamonds are boring too, so she's getting a gorgeous emerald engagement ring. :thumbup:

    If/When you buy a pricey engagement ring, try to find a policy that protects against theft for it. Your homeowner's or renter's insurance will barely scratch the surface -- $500-$1000 is common.

    $2-3K can buy absolutely gorgeous diamond rings. I say buy a ring (with a return policy!) and surprise her. She'll love it. :) Or take her ring shopping, with the idea that you'll discuss a ring before buying -- just scout out beforehand which are the in the price range that you want.

    You can also get a less-awesome engagement band (like an eternity band), with the promise of a better ring when you get married. If she's not happy with any of the above, seriously consider whether she is right for you. :luck:

    EDIT: Also, never buy a CZ and pretend it's a diamond. :rolleyes: It's hard to find a durable, good setting and when a stone pops out she might be the one to take it in to be repaired. You really would be spending $10k on a ring then! It's way, way, way better to get something like a gemstone (pink sapphire is popular) and not worry about getting found out. :thumbup:
     
    #42 Grif, Mar 3, 2009
    Last edited: Mar 3, 2009
  44. AznTrojan

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    go to wholesalers that use rappaport list prices to find out how much ring you can afford.. and negotiate hard..

    get the best cut you can afford.. then color.. and then clarity..

    i got my ring for about 18% off list price... it's beautiful diamond soliatare plantinum ring that would cost about 8000-9500 from other companies (e.g. blue nile, mayors, etc) for only 5750..
     
    #43 AznTrojan, Mar 16, 2009
    Last edited: Mar 16, 2009

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