You make me REALLY wish I were in Texas right now where I wouldn't freeze solid if I decided to sit outside in front of a fire tonight. Speaking of which, I'm going for some Texas BBQ brisket tonight. Yee Haw! Supposedly one of the most authentic attempts at it in Chicago, at least.
etf, I recommend you do the same. Indulge in something pleasurable (whether that's a chocolate cake, brisket, a bottle of wine, a bonfire to burn the letters in, etc.), and just try to look forward. If your will is in it, I know you'll make a great doctor, despite this ridiculously disheartening process. Regardless, I'm really sorry about the rejections, and especially the way they came to you in an avalanche. That's harsh. Way harsh.