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JulieanneSD

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Hello, I first want to say that this is a great site and thank you for all the useful information.

about me, I'm 22 and I'm a single mom, have a 5 year old son. some how i mange to go to school full time get good grades and help my son with his homework, and help out in his class room. I'm going to a local CC, planning on transferring to a UC school. I really want to be a DR, something that i have always wanted to do but never thought i could, i have had some people (counselors ) tell me that i should not do this, that i should settle for something like RN, even tho its not something i want to do. I do well in school i always get A's and B's, i study hard, and i don't give up very easy. with that being said i have some questions.

are there in single moms that have done this? any advise? are my counselor's right should i settle for something less because i have a kid? I understand that this is going to be hard (it already is), but why should i settle for something less just because i have s kid?

I was thinking about being a BIO major with a minor in chem (going to take a chem class and see how well i do) If i do well in this do i have a better chance at med school then lets say a psychology major?

PS. did doing med school / pre-med have any impact on your kid/s, good bad?

thank you for taking the time to read this any advise would be really appreciated

-Julies
 
JulieanneSD said:
Hello, I first want to say that this is a great site and thank you for all the useful information.

about me, I'm 22 and I'm a single mom, have a 5 year old son. some how i mange to go to school full time get good grades and help my son with his homework, and help out in his class room. I'm going to a local CC, planning on transferring to a UC school. I really want to be a DR, something that i have always wanted to do but never thought i could, i have had some people (counselors ) tell me that i should not do this, that i should settle for something like RN, even tho its not something i want to do. I do well in school i always get A's and B's, i study hard, and i don't give up very easy. with that being said i have some questions.

are there in single moms that have done this? any advise? are my counselor's right should i settle for something less because i have a kid? I understand that this is going to be hard (it already is), but why should i settle for something less just because i have s kid?

I was thinking about being a BIO major with a minor in chem (going to take a chem class and see how well i do) If i do well in this do i have a better chance at med school then lets say a psychology major?

PS. did doing med school / pre-med have any impact on your kid/s, good bad?

thank you for taking the time to read this any advise would be really appreciated

-Julies
Click to expand...

OK, first ignore everyone! Your counselors are idiots! How insulting to suggest you should "settle" and become an RN. (No RN bashing intended) I hope none of those idiots are women because they just set women's rights back fifty years by saying that! Anyway, DON'T SETTLE!!! Become a doctor if that's what you want. It will be harder with a child, but certainly not impossible.
I was eighteen when I had my first child. I hated high school and ended up getting a GED. I started college twice before sticking with it a third time. I went to a community college and graduated. From there I went on to a four year school. I just graduated with my BA in Biology this past August. I am now 28, married, and the mother of four children. While I now have the support of my husband, I have only been with him for eight years so I was a single mother for the first few years of my daughter's life. I know what it is like to balance being a mother and going to school. I am starting medical school in August and I know that it hard, but I know that I can do it. My children are 10, 5, 22 months, and 9 months and they are all happy, healthy, and loved. It will not be easy, but if you are determined and strong, you will succeed. Your plan sounds great. Keep your grades up. Your intended major is great. Try to work in some ECs somehow...volunteering, research, etc. That was the most difficult part for me because I really have no extra time, but you will work it out somehow if you try. I truly wish you all the luck in the world and I know you can do it. Just ignore those idiots and work hard and you will become a doctor someday. :luck: :luck: :luck:
 
JulieanneSD said:
Hello, I first want to say that this is a great site and thank you for all the useful information.

about me, I'm 22 and I'm a single mom, have a 5 year old son. some how i mange to go to school full time get good grades and help my son with his homework, and help out in his class room. I'm going to a local CC, planning on transferring to a UC school. I really want to be a DR, something that i have always wanted to do but never thought i could, i have had some people (counselors ) tell me that i should not do this, that i should settle for something like RN, even tho its not something i want to do. I do well in school i always get A's and B's, i study hard, and i don't give up very easy. with that being said i have some questions.

are there in single moms that have done this? any advise? are my counselor's right should i settle for something less because i have a kid? I understand that this is going to be hard (it already is), but why should i settle for something less just because i have s kid?

I was thinking about being a BIO major with a minor in chem (going to take a chem class and see how well i do) If i do well in this do i have a better chance at med school then lets say a psychology major?

PS. did doing med school / pre-med have any impact on your kid/s, good bad?

thank you for taking the time to read this any advise would be really appreciated

-Julies
Click to expand...

First of all, getting an RN, PA, PT, RRT or any allied health profession is not "settling" for anything. If you had an interest in those professions, you would be pursuing them.

Second, having a child is quite compatable with attending medical school and the practice of medicine. It takes careful planning and having a good support system. I do not have any children but I come from a 10 physician family where one of my parents was a physician. I probably spent more time with my physician parent than folks who came from families with no physicians. My parents were great and I was fortunate to have both of them. There are no theives or ax murderers in my family so I guess we turned out OK.

Third, major in anything that you love and that you can do well in. If you find that you love Biology, then major in biology. If you find that you love chemistry, then major in chemistry. It is hard to do well in any major so choose what you love and it will be easier to do well.

Having a child makes you a parent. Being a parent does not make you more or less of a human being in terms of achieving your goals and dreams. While you have to prepare and plan for two people instead of one. I suspect that you have been doing than since your child was born.

The important thing is to take your time and do not let anyone (counselor or not) discourage you. What got you to this point will likely get you through to the fulfillment of your career.

I had plenty of classmates who came into medical school with children or had children while in medical school. Sure, you might not be attending all of those wild "after exam" parties or have to study at home rather than in the library but you can do what you have to do to be a good parent and be a good student. It looks like you have been honing those skills already. Good luck!
 
Just go for it.
I'm a single father of two boys 9 & 2...and I'm halfway through my first year of med school.
You can do it. 👍
 
I knew of two single moms during my travels through education and both were total trainwrecks. In med school and residency, they pissed off alot of people with emergency absences, extra sick days and overall lack of attention to their daily tasks from having to juggle too much. In a classic speech I will never forget, I remember a chief resident give a toast to one single mom at a party (where he was trashed) saying "I want to separate out Julie the person, who we all love...from Julie the doctor, who we cant stand" then there was several minutes of uncomfortable silence. :laugh:

Once you get past medical school and residency and fellowship tho, I think you can easily find a job somewhere with enough downtime to manage things. Just a long 9 years getting to that point.

Signed,
SDN Negative Nancy
 
I really hate to discourage you or anyone who has the will, but I think you have to really consider LADoc00's stories. In the end, you will have to balance the time you spend with your child with the time you spend with your patients. Both require your care and devotion, and it takes a special person to be able to give both without falling apart. Are you that kind of person? Are you someone who has family and friends lined up to bail you out when you can't be 2 places at one? Would you be hurting your relationship with your son, your patients, your co-workers? I can't answer those questions about you, but I honestly know it's something I would not be capable of. You'll lose no respect in my book by knowing your limitations.
 
Thanks for the advise, I went back in to talk to my counselor and he was out sick so i got to talk to someone else who was a HUGE help.

As far as manging my time, I understand that its going to be hard, i never miss class now, (i have always had a extremely good work ethic) and i don't ever intend on doing it. I have a GREAT support system. they are always there for me, and help me more then i could have ever imagined.

thanks again for the advise 🙂
 
Hey, if med school is your dream, you should go for it. Otherwise, you're just going to be saying 'Why didn't I?' on down the road. Don't let other people try to discourage you from it because you have a kid. This is no longer the 1950s. I had my first child when I was 19 and still finished undergrad with two bachelors in a reasonable amount of time, have worked in a professional job for 6+ years fulfilling my responsiblities as much as the next person who has no children, and did a master's degree on top of it. Oh, and I had my second child while working and doing the masters. I've actually had people tell me that it bothers them that I have been so successful when I didn't do it the 'right way'. It's actually their way of saying, 'I sacrificed kids for all this, and you have no right to be on the same playing field with me when you didn't sacrifice like I did.' DON'T LISTEN TO THEM!!!! They're going to have kids ten years down the road, show up late for meetings, have to go home cause the kid's sick, etc. in the middle of their highly professional job. At least you did it when you were still young and in school.
 
Lol i never really thought about it like that but you are very right. I had a long talk with my sons dad, so it seems like he might move back here to help me, along with my family and friends helping i should be ok. this is something i want very badly. thank you again for your advise




t-funk said:
Hey, if med school is your dream, you should go for it. Otherwise, you're just going to be saying 'Why didn't I?' on down the road. Don't let other people try to discourage you from it because you have a kid. This is no longer the 1950s. I had my first child when I was 19 and still finished undergrad with two bachelors in a reasonable amount of time, have worked in a professional job for 6+ years fulfilling my responsiblities as much as the next person who has no children, and did a master's degree on top of it. Oh, and I had my second child while working and doing the masters. I've actually had people tell me that it bothers them that I have been so successful when I didn't do it the 'right way'. It's actually their way of saying, 'I sacrificed kids for all this, and you have no right to be on the same playing field with me when you didn't sacrifice like I did.' DON'T LISTEN TO THEM!!!! They're going to have kids ten years down the road, show up late for meetings, have to go home cause the kid's sick, etc. in the middle of their highly professional job. At least you did it when you were still young and in school.
Click to expand...
 
LADoc00 said:
I knew of two single moms during my travels through education and both were total trainwrecks. In med school and residency, they pissed off alot of people with emergency absences, extra sick days and overall lack of attention to their daily tasks from having to juggle too much. In a classic speech I will never forget, I remember a chief resident give a toast to one single mom at a party (where he was trashed) saying "I want to separate out Julie the person, who we all love...from Julie the doctor, who we cant stand" then there was several minutes of uncomfortable silence. :laugh:

Once you get past medical school and residency and fellowship tho, I think you can easily find a job somewhere with enough downtime to manage things. Just a long 9 years getting to that point.

Signed,
SDN Negative Nancy
Click to expand...


hasn't california broken off yet?
 
i think it comes down to the support system. i think doing something as intensive as med school completely on your own with your child(ren) would make everyone miserable (the student, the child(ren), the classmates, etc.). however, if you've got a great support network and aren't doing everything on your own, you should be just as able to succeed as anyone else 🙂 and since it sounds like you do have that support network, i'm glad you're going for it.
 
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