Favorite anesthesia jokes?

error404 · Feb 10, 2009

Interviews are over and all that's left is making a list, checking it twice, and opening an envelope that decides our fates.So, anyone heard any good ones on the trail?

My favorite so far:

A cardiac anesthesiologist is flying across the country for a conference, when a flight attendant comes running down the aisle, shouting, "Is anyone on board a cardiac anesthesiologist?!?!"

The anesthesiologist raises his hand and announces his presence, and asks what the problem is, and whether anyone is sick.

"Oh, no, no one's sick, but there's a cardiac surgeon up in first class who needs his table adjusted."

(I think this is funny. But I also married a surgeon.)

Dimoak · Feb 10, 2009

So Jeff and Sue meet at a conference, and after a few drinks, they decide to head up to a hotel room. After concluding a passionate night of lovemaking, Sue gets up and walks over to the sink to wash up.

Jeff, while observing, says "Hey, you must be a surgeon!"

Sue looks up front the sink with a smile on here face. "Why yes, how did you know?"

"Well," says Jeff, "it's about how meticulously you're washing your hands."

"Ah," says Sue, "well then you must be an anesthesiologist!"

"Wow, that's right!" says Jeff, "how did you figure that out?"

"Well," says Sue, "it became obvious last night. I didn't feel a thing!"

geauxg8rs · Feb 10, 2009

Q. what do you call an anesthesiologist in a suit?

A. the defendant

veetz · Feb 10, 2009

The final exam for an anesthesiology rotation is a crossword puzzle.

Gimlet · Feb 10, 2009

There's always the good old ABCs of anesthesiology:

Airway, Book, Chair or
Airway, Bagel, Coffee

I don't think I've ever heard the anesthesiology version of the "How do you hide a $100 bill from a [insert specialty type i.e. radiologist, plastic surgeon, etc]. Does anyone have a good one for the anesthesia iteration of that joke?

Mista Suprane · Feb 10, 2009

what's the difference between an anesthesiologist and a urologist?

a urologist plays with SOMEBODY ELSE'S genitals during surgery.

Bertelman · Feb 10, 2009

Gimlet said:
There's always the good old ABCs of anesthesiology:

Airway, Book, Chair or
Airway, Bagel, Coffee

ABCs for codes...

Airway Buh-bye

RT2MD · Feb 11, 2009

Bertelman said:
ABCs for codes...

Airway Buh-bye

C-ya...

(That's the version that I have heard where I work!) :laugh:

Consigliere · Feb 11, 2009

Airway
Book
Coffee
Doughnut
Eat
Funnies (Read)
Go
Home

dbiddy808 · Feb 11, 2009

A, B, C's of anesthesia --> airway, book, chair. A, B, C's of surgery --> abuse, belittle, criticize.

gassed · Feb 11, 2009

I used to play the violin a bit. The running joke in the family is that now I know 2 ways to put people to sleep.

error404 · Feb 11, 2009

gassed said:
I used to play the violin a bit. The running joke in the family is that now I know 2 ways to put people to sleep.

That's awesome.

What was that statement someone made in another thread a while back, about anesthesiologists and surgeons? "One is a brilliant and compassionate physician, and the other is a boring, predictable guy who puts people to sleep."? Something like that... (I took it to be a knock against surgeons, but I guess I could see how the poster meant something else.)

lfesiam · Feb 12, 2009

Humphry Davy's Nitrous oxide

NUGasStud · Feb 12, 2009

aphistis · Feb 12, 2009

"Probably no one will attempt to fight." Now that's the kind of disclaimer that makes you feel good.

Dryacku · Feb 12, 2009

you know your a good anesthesiologist, when you can work with *******s all day and not smell like **** :xf:

TrustMe · Feb 12, 2009

dbiddy808 said:
A, B, C's of anesthesia --> airway, book, chair. A, B, C's of surgery --> abuse, belittle, criticize.

Also have heard Acuse, Blame, Criticize or Avoid, Blame, Criticize.

deleted162650 · Dec 16, 2014

What do an anesthesiologist and a walrus have in common?

Both like a tight seal.

Spinach Dip · Dec 17, 2014

Gimlet said:
I don't think I've ever heard the anesthesiology version of the "How do you hide a $100 bill from a [insert specialty type i.e. radiologist, plastic surgeon, etc]. Does anyone have a good one for the anesthesia iteration of that joke?

*Raises hand*

How do you hide a $100 bill from an anesthesiologist?

-Put it in the cabinet with the sterile gloves.

-Place it anywhere below the patient's chin.

-Let the AANA know there is a $100 bill somewhere in the hospital. No anesthesiologist will stand a chance.

Pick one.

ProwlerturnGas · Dec 17, 2014

I get paid to do what I do best in life….pass gas

Chip N Sawbones · Dec 18, 2014

Spinach Dip said:
*Raises hand*

How do you hide a $100 bill from an anesthesiologist?

-Put it in the cabinet with the sterile gloves.

-Place it anywhere below the patient's chin.

-Let the AANA know there is a $100 bill somewhere in the hospital. No anesthesiologist will stand a chance.

Pick one.

You don't need to hide money to keep it from an anesthesiologist. Just don't wake him up.

theanimalmallet1310 · Sep 22, 2015

veetz said:
The final exam for an anesthesiology rotation is a crossword puzzle.

Which member of the surgical team that falls asleep during an operation? The Anaesthetist of course. HAHAHAHA!

theanimalmallet1310 · Sep 22, 2015

Went to the doctors the other day, I says to the doctor, have you got anything for wind? So he gave me a kite. HAHAHAHAHA!

theanimalmallet1310 · Sep 22, 2015

Went to the doctors the other day, doctor says, go to Bournemouth, it's great for flu. So I went and got it. HAHAHAHA!

theanimalmallet1310 · Sep 22, 2015

Consultant Anaesthetist gets me in to his office and gives me a right telling off, you know, shouting and bawling for doing something so bloody trivial, so after his outburst, he said What have you got to say for yourself, Junior Doctor before I suspend you, lad. I said, Sir, I've only one word to say to you, Consultant Anaesthetist says, what's that? I said, Word. HAHAHAHAHA!

bashwell · Sep 22, 2015

theanimalmallet1310 said:
Went to the doctors the other day, I says to the doctor, have you got anything for wind? So he gave me a kite. HAHAHAHAHA!

theanimalmallet1310 said:
Went to the doctors the other day, doctor says, go to Bournemouth, it's great for flu. So I went and got it. HAHAHAHA!

theanimalmallet1310 said:
Consultant Anaesthetist gets me in to his office and gives me a right telling off, you know, shouting and bawling for doing something so bloody trivial, so after his outburst, he said What have you got to say for yourself, Junior Doctor before I suspend you, lad. I said, Sir, I've only one word to say to you, Consultant Anaesthetist says, what's that? I said, Word. HAHAHAHAHA!

Welp, these would probably not be among my favorite anesthesia jokes. But maybe I just don't get British humor.

Consigliere · Sep 23, 2015

This entire speciality is the biggest joke ever.

leaverus · Sep 27, 2015

Definition of an anesthesiologist: someone half-awake keeping someone else half-asleep.

chocomorsel · Sep 27, 2015

Consigliere said:
This entire speciality is the biggest joke ever.

In the U.S. Anyway.

NewtownD · Oct 6, 2015

Did you hear that Michel Jackson was a difficult intubation?

Apparently they blamed it on the bougie

bashwell · Oct 8, 2016

Favorite anesthesia jokes?

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