Saying things in an appopriate, non-personalizing manner is a professional skill. I realize full well that people can choose to be offended if they disagree with me. I see no reason to hold opinions if their are relevant to the conversation/topic at hand just because a person could mispercieve them or be offended.
Particularly in my work setting, if I do not push, things dont change. People dont always like this. But, changing the historic treatment paradigm is part of my job description here.
True, but we are not doing people favors if we lead them to believe that the professional world is this magical world of acceptance where you are loved and respected by all. Truth is, if you want respect, you have to earn it. Show people why you are valuable with your work and worth as a provider.
I get what you're saying, letsgonyr, I think; I just don't perceive the board to be such a briar patch as others do, nor do I think others have made a reasonable case that it is (e.g., citing one example of a new poster saying something offensive toward psyds that was immediately jumped on as being the zeitgeist of the board).[/QUOTE]
I agree. How can I write a good review if I'm worried that my more critical feedback (i.e., usually the actually important feedback) "might be" interpreted as offensive? I've seen some people be offended at so little as correcting grammar, so I don't know how to avoid the overlap. I've also gotten some pretty rough peer reviews myself as well; the very least I have to say is, "this person completely misunderstood me, so I have to fix how I wrote that" or even "this person has an agenda and probably others do too, I better make a better case in the paper."
I think part of the issue is that some people don't think they're misinterpreting what is being said, but rather, that they are insulted by something they are
correctly interpreting. Though... I will say that I don't think only people on "Team A" are rude at times, I think people on "Team FSPS" can be rude as well. And often, the tone of a reply is similar to the tone of the original post.
I think Erg said this, and I agree... a lot of our professional identities comes out in our posts. If someone is a big fan of Ellis and REBT and posts in that type of straightforward, no-BS manner, than someone who is not used to that style (or more Rogerian or whatever) might interpret that as rude or offensive, when it is not intended to be so.
I also think I wasn't clear before; I was not advocating not saying what is on one's mind or posting anything controversial. From my perspective, a lot of the issues arise because people say things repeatedly, and when they're saying the same thing over and over again, they get frustrated and snarky. So, in my view, there is room for restraint once a point has been made. Personal views don't need to be posted as often or as passionately.
Though, I will say, in the few times I've posted... I have never felt offended or disrespected by other members. So, I thank you all for that. I try to be respectful while sharing my opinions, and I hope you all feel that I have been, as well.