Poorly Driving Med Student Rant

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OrnotMajestic

Ugly on the inside, too
15+ Year Member
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OK, I've held it in too long....forgive the grammar/spelling because this is going to be quick...

Med Students:

What the hell is it with third and fourth year med students who work their asses off to get great grades, go to a great school, shine like a star, and they want to rise to the topo, but don't put a moment's thought into how they look to patients/faculty/peons while driving. I'm not talking about basic transportation (you know, like walking...who walks? I suppose they can't help it, but please. I don't even walk on the golf course.) I'm talking about driving like you're a professional, not a school teacher.

Example: The most common vehicle I see med students driving is Ford Taurus wagon or a late nineties Acura Integra. They probably bought them used before going to college (*puke*). It's usually coupled with some scratches, a few dents, and that oh so stylish road grime gracing the bottom half of the vehicle. I don't think it's seen a wash since it left the used car lot at the repo auction!

The average med student will graduate with something like $150K of debt. After all that tuition, living expense, books, etc, why in the world would you not spend the extra 80-90K on a stellar vehicle? This is all it would take:
-A BMW M5 or M3. Or you could substitute for a 5 or 3 series if your polo membership was increased. An Audi A4 will go in a pinch, but you better step up to the A8 unless you want every cardiologist laughing in your face. LAUGHING. Can you hear the laughter? Oh, with Italian leather seats.
-A pair of Italian leather driving gloves. They squeak "Mama Mia" when you put them on.
-Extra tinted windows covered in Italian leather.
-Italian leather sunglasses.

Using the high end estimate, you spend $100K. That's not even a drop in the bucket compared to the total amount you will make after your plastics fellowship. And you know what? A nice car bra (Italian leather, of course) won't hurt either. You also might want to invenst in a giant stick (covered in Italian leather) that you can make sure is firmly lodged all the way past your sigmoid colon. That car will give you a little extra zing, especially when you are driving through the connected undergrad campus while wearing your white coat. Driving slowly so all the freshmen see you.

What's the defense? It costs too much? No it doesn't. That 100k you spend will reap HUGE rewards when your attending sees you showing him/her up instead of just merely kissing ass. You have no sense of style? OK, that could be, but pick up a copy of Forbes and fake it! You mean to tell me you can memorize Harrison's, but you can't drive like your daddy bought it for you?

But you know, in a way, I'm glad that so many people seem incapable of making themselves look like a professional. It makes me stand out more!

That's my rant.
 
OrnotMajestic said:
OK, I've held it in too long....forgive the grammar/spelling because this is going to be quick...

Med Students:

What the hell is it with third and fourth year med students who work their asses off to get great grades, go to a great school, shine like a star, and they want to rise to the topo, but don't put a moment's thought into how they look to patients/faculty/peons while driving. I'm not talking about basic transportation (you know, like walking...who walks? I suppose they can't help it, but please. I don't even walk on the golf course.) I'm talking about driving like you're a professional, not a school teacher.

Example: The most common vehicle I see med students driving is Ford Taurus wagon or a late nineties Acura Integra. They probably bought them used before going to college (*puke*). It's usually coupled with some scratches, a few dents, and that oh so stylish road grime gracing the bottom half of the vehicle. I don't think it's seen a wash since it left the used car lot at the repo auction!

The average med student will graduate with something like $150K of debt. After all that tuition, living expense, books, etc, why in the world would you not spend the extra 80-90K on a stellar vehicle? This is all it would take:
-A BMW M5 or M3. Or you could substitute for a 5 or 3 series if your polo membership was increased. An Audi A4 will go in a pinch, but you better step up to the A8 unless you want every cardiologist laughing in your face. LAUGHING. Can you hear the laughter? Oh, with Italian leather seats.
-A pair of Italian leather driving gloves. They squeak "Mama Mia" when you put them on.
-Extra tinted windows covered in Italian leather.
-Italian leather sunglasses.

Using the high end estimate, you spend $100K. That's not even a drop in the bucket compared to the total amount you will make after your plastics fellowship. And you know what? A nice car bra (Italian leather, of course) won't hurt either. You also might want to invenst in a giant stick (covered in Italian leather) that you can make sure is firmly lodged all the way past your sigmoid colon. That car will give you a little extra zing, especially when you are driving through the connected undergrad campus while wearing your white coat. Driving slowly so all the freshmen see you.

What's the defense? It costs too much? No it doesn't. That 100k you spend will reap HUGE rewards when your attending sees you showing him/her up instead of just merely kissing ass. You have no sense of style? OK, that could be, but pick up a copy of Forbes and fake it! You mean to tell me you can memorize Harrison's, but you can't drive like your daddy bought it for you?

But you know, in a way, I'm glad that so many people seem incapable of making themselves look like a professional. It makes me stand out more!

That's my rant.


2001 Toyota Echo, baby!

42 mpg.


P. Bear, MD
Emergency Medicine Resident
Four Kids, Five Dogs, Better Things to Spend My Money On
 
Car bras are actually bad for your car.







But that was excellent.
 
Best post in weeks!! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
 
Panda Bear said:
2001 Toyota Echo, baby!

42 mpg.

I have owned two Toyotas in my life (I have a 2001 Camry right now) and I have to say, they have never steered me wrong! (no pun intended)
 
Nice rebuttal to the **** who posted about us being poorly dressed. :laugh:
 
OrnotMajestic said:
I have owned two Toyotas in my life (I have a 2001 Camry right now) and I have to say, they have never steered me wrong! (no pun intended)



I don't get it...




On another note, i drive a ford windstar, but to make you feel better, i will hang my head in shame while i drive. Everybody's happy.
 
Wow, you must be an excellent medical student to have enough free time to write lengthy and mildly amusing parodies of other posts on studentdocnet.
 
:laugh: Seriously. What's the point of buying all those designer clothes if you're just going to stink them up with Taurus Wagon smell?
 
Great thread. :laugh: 👍 I didn't know italian leather was so trendy lately :laugh:

I'll be driving a Sentra 2002 soon. I really wanted that M5, but I'm afraid I chose the wrong career 🙁

By the way, I don't walk, I get carried. (10 $ to anyone who gets the reference)
 
Only nurses drive themselves to work. Any self-respecting physician or physician-to-be hires a driver.

Giles, fetch the Maybach!
 
MWillie said:
Wow, you must be an excellent medical student to have enough free time to write lengthy and mildly amusing parodies of other posts on studentdocnet.

that wasn't just mildly amusing... it was hilarious. Plus, he didn't really write it from scratch. It was just a few words here and there and viola... a great parody 👍 👍
 
tacrum43 said:
:laugh: Seriously. What's the point of buying all those designer clothes if you're just going to stink them up with Taurus Wagon smell?

Haha, I used to drive a Taurus Wagon! But since 1999, I've been rocking the VW Beetle. Totally bitchin'. . .especially since someone stole my antenna!

But seriously. Great post, Ornot.
 
Vox Animo said:
I don't get it...




On another note, i drive a ford windstar, but to make you feel better, i will hang my head in shame while i drive. Everybody's happy.

You know...Toyotas...STEERING...you steer a car...so Toyotas have never STEERED me wrong....

Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?
 
MWillie said:
Wow, you must be an excellent medical student to have enough free time to write lengthy and mildly amusing parodies of other posts on studentdocnet.


Ornot's guide to finding your sense of humor:

1) Unzip pants
2) Reach hand way deep inside
3) Grasp firmly your panties
4) Untwist

Addendum: If the knot in said panties is ridiculously complicated, please consult your nearest Boy Scout manual for assistance.

P.S. I do just fine in medical school. In fact, some of us even find time to eat, poop and occasionally watch a movie!!
 
IbnSina said:
Car bras are actually bad for your car.


But without that support, won't the headlights sag in a few years?

I slay me.
 
Blake did you quote Scott Adams with the carry reference?
 
Oh yeah this thread is the greatest thing since.... italian leather sunglasses.
 
Blake said:
By the way, I don't walk, I get carried. (10 $ to anyone who gets the reference)

I am actually stumped. Movie quote, may I presume?
 
OrnotMajestic said:
I am actually stumped. Movie quote, may I presume?
Nah, music reference. No fan of Wu-Tang in the house ? 🙁
 
OrnotMajestic said:
You know...Toyotas...STEERING...you steer a car...so Toyotas have never STEERED me wrong....

Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?




at least you caught my sarcasm
 
OrnotMajestic said:
-A pair of Italian leather driving gloves. They squeak "Mama Mia" when you put them on.
.


lol...I thought of this line last night and couldn't help but start laughing...

but mainly I just wanted to make sure that as long as the clothes rant is still being posted on, this one gets bumped every once in a while too so they stay together. 😎

:meanie:
 
AHHAHA.
HAHHAHAH.
You all are soo funnay!
Funnay funnay people! ALL of you! Wow!
 
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