is this risky to write about in secondaries?

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Tibor

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i had a major medical problem that is now gone. will this answer make me look weak?


Here is the Q:

Tell us about a difficult or challenging situation that you have encountered and how you dealt with it. In your response, identify both the coping skills that you called upon to resolve the dilemma, and the support person(s) from whom you sought advice.


Here is my answer:



I feel strange writing about this in my secondaries, but because it was such a challenging and chronic situation, it would not be truthful if I did not write about this. For my entire life, I had suffered from major sleep and attention-span problems. My parents, several doctors, and myself had never figured out the cause of these problems, until I visited a very sharp ENT in July 2006. He told me that the cause of these problems were based on my extremely large adenoids, deviated septum, and other minor airway blockages. He performed multiple surgeries on me on September of 2006.

It was not until after my surgery that I realized how tenacious and adaptable I was forced to become in order to prevent these problems from interfering with my academics. My constant fatigue and lack of attention span due severe airway problems forced me to become a book-learner throughout ever since elementary school up through college, since I was unable to pay attention in class. When college came around, in order to cope with my problem, I skipped all of my classes unless they had mandatory attendance. Instead, I would use this time to memorize textbook readings for each class, and use additional literature and review books in order to solidify and reinforce my knowledge. Although this was a hugely inefficient way of getting through college, it was my only choice available in order to succeed. My ability to graduate in three years can be largely attributed to the fact that I was able to take five to six courses of my choice each semester--despite the fact that many course times conflicted with others--solely because I never attended lectures.

Other than my parents and doctors, I had few support persons to seek advice from, since most people assumed my problems were a result of laziness. Currently, I feel fantastic and can pay attention better than ever, and I feel sharper and more energetic than ever before. I believe that the extreme adaptability and indestructible work ethic I was forced to develop over the years was a gift in disguise, and that I will finally be able to use these traits to their fullest potential in order to achieve great success in medical school.
 
I think if it's a problem that has affected your life, you should certainly talk about it, but I would also put some more info about how you were after the surgery. Did you attend your classes after you got the surgery b/c you could now pay attention? I doubt they'd hold a medical condition against you, as long as you can prove that you're going to be able to handle the rigors of medical school and now have a relatively clean bill of health. My $0.02.
 
I've got no problem with it, but I would change some of the word usage if this is the final draft.

example
"very sharp ENT" --->> "talented/skilled/etc otolaryngologist"

Some may say the ENT is fine, but I'd drop 'very sharp' for sure.
 
Yes, following the surgery I only had one semester left, but I attended every class possible, received a perfect GPA that semester, and took the most challenging courseload possible. (5 classes composed of 2 upper level sciences, an extremely time consuming history thesis seminar, 3rd semester foreign language, and 400 level history class). also, I studied half as much vs. other semesters (during previous semesters I would study anywhere from 4-6 hrs a day---and that was for normal weeks). it sucked!

anyway, I don't know what part of what I just said I should include. Do you think it will look like im bragging if i said all of what I just wrote (took 5 challenging courses, perfect gpa, studied half as much)?

thanks for the input on my original post.
 
Yes, following the surgery I only had one semester left, but I attended every class possible, received a perfect GPA that semester, and took the most challenging courseload possible. (5 classes composed of 2 upper level sciences, an extremely time consuming history thesis seminar, 3rd semester foreign language, and 400 level history class). also, I studied half as much vs. other semesters (where I would study anywhere from 4-6 hrs a day).

You might want to talk about that (except the studying less part) and yeah, streamline the text a bit.
 
I don't think it comes off as overly verbose, but then again I tend to be overly verbose.

I agree, depending on the character limits, it's fine. I would definitely talk about the result of the procedure and your success after you got the surgery done. I'm sure med schools want to be sure you can go to class and pay attention!
 
i think you can clean up your essay a bit. i'll show you a few examples: (remove what is italicized; keep bold)

I feel strange writing about this in my secondaries, but because it was such a challenging and chronic situation, it would not be truthful if I did not write about this. For my entire life, I had suffered from major sleep and attention-span problems. My parents, several doctors, and myself I had never figured out the cause of these problems, until I visited an very sharp ENT in July 2006. He told me that The cause of these problems were based on my extremely large adenoids, deviated septum, and other minor airway blockages. He performed multiple surgeries on me on September of 2006.

get the picture? but it's up to you.
 
I think it would be a good idea to stay away from talking about how you skipped lectures and took conflicting classes because you weren't going to go anyway. That may be true, and it may have worked for you, but adcoms are very concerned that students be active contributors to the class as a whole.

As other people have said, focus on the positive. After reading it, what I came away with was how you skipped classes and did other things in order to get by. You could probably condense your paragraph about coping into a single sentence to the effect of your topic sentence in the second paragraph. Perhaps add one more mentioning that you realized that your methods for coping were incredibly inefficient and it was only after the weight was lifted that you became aware of how much time you spent adapting.

Readers should come away from it remembering that you had difficulties before, you were resilient enough to find ways to cope with them and after the surgery you came back even stronger than you were before.

Just my $0.02... And as a disclaimer, I'm just another applicant...
 
I think it would be a good idea to stay away from talking about how you skipped lectures and took conflicting classes because you weren't going to go anyway. That may be true, and it may have worked for you, but adcoms are very concerned that students be active contributors to the class as a whole.

As other people have said, focus on the positive. After reading it, what I came away with was how you skipped classes and did other things in order to get by. You could probably condense your paragraph about coping into a single sentence to the effect of your topic sentence in the second paragraph. Perhaps add one more mentioning that you realized that your methods for coping were incredibly inefficient and it was only after the weight was lifted that you became aware of how much time you spent adapting.

Readers should come away from it remembering that you had difficulties before, you were resilient enough to find ways to cope with them and after the surgery you came back even stronger than you were before.

Just my $0.02... And as a disclaimer, I'm just another applicant...

i basically second what this guy said. i understand the desire to include details, but you must consider how the adcoms will view it.
 
thanks so much for the helpful posts!

however, i am not sure what to do now, since most people said to remove the part about skipping lectures and about being able to study less post-surgery. Those are the main things that help exemplify the difference between me pre and post surgery. without mentioning those two things, I am not sure what I could say other than getting good grades was "harder" prior to surgery.

Does everyone agree that I should take out the whole "skipping out on lecture" part....or should I keep it, and word it differently, or simply balance it out by talking more positively afterwards?
 
I have only a small suggestion, but it may help you.

I saw that you used the word "currently" in the sentence "Currently, I feel fantastic..." etc. You might want to consider saying something like "Ever since my surgeries" instead. When I think of the word "currently" it makes me wonder, does this mean that this person might fall back into a less-than-great state at some point in the future? I hope you understand what I mean.

And I agree with trimming down the words and focusing on the positive. 🙂
 
i think you can clean up your essay a bit. i'll show you a few examples: (remove what is italicized; keep bold)

I feel strange writing about this in my secondaries, but because it was such a challenging and chronic situation, it would not be truthful if I did not write about this. For my entire life, I had suffered from major sleep and attention-span problems. My parents, several doctors, and myself I had never figured out the cause of these problems, until I visited an very sharp ENT in July 2006. He told me that The cause of these problems were based on my extremely large adenoids, deviated septum, and other minor airway blockages. He performed multiple surgeries on me on September of 2006.

get the picture? but it's up to you.

good, concise re-write...just one edit...
"the cause of these problems WAS...", not were
 
good, concise re-write...just one edit...
"the cause of these problems WAS...", not were

thanks. whoops, it's supposed to read "the causeS of these problems were". also, i'd change "these" to "my"

oh, another edit: change "multiple surgeries on me ON September" to read "multiple surgeries on me IN September"
 
again, thank you guys so much for your help. The essay is a rough draft, i was gonna revise it after posting it on here, but thanks for the tips on cleaning it up though, I will def use your suggestions.

however, i just want to know: do you guys think its really THAT bad to write about skipping class and all that? thats part of the reason why I posted this, b/c I want to know if it was THAT risky to write about. I really wanted to keep it b/c it shows how far out of the ordinary I went to make sure I did well, but I guess i will take it out only if people think it is truly that risky to keep in there.
 
thats part of the reason why I posted this, b/c I want to know if it was THAT risky to write about.

The problem is, you never know who will be reading your responses. It might be somebody who empathizes with how you feel, or somebody who applauds your honesty. And it might be exclusively people who aren't willing to take the risk on an applicant who openly admits cutting class.

It's a gamble. Do you really want to gamble with your medical school applications when it could probably be every bit as strong, if not stronger, without taking the risk? It could work either way, and it's ultimately your choice.
 
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