- Joined
- Mar 4, 2019
- Messages
- 2
- Reaction score
- 1
Last edited:
Some details about me (semi-anonymized):
I have been accepted into a number of top-tier MSTPs (narrowed down to 4 now), but I am freezing up because I feel like I am being forced to make an uninformed decision. I have had a stellar time within my lab. I have forged amazing friendships and find it so enjoyable. I am also very much a people person and can see myself loving clinical medicine, but I can only determine this after some clinical rotations (thankful for 1-1.5 year curriculums). Yes, I have done clinical volunteering. Yes, I really enjoyed it. Yet, obviously “clinical volunteering” will be nothing compared to actually being in it. I have read numerous threads on students dropping their PhD and @Neuronix 's perspective on the journey as well. People state that if you don’t want to run a lab, then don’t do the PhD. How does any MD/PhD know this? Are people banking on the fact they won’t enjoy clinical rotations as much as lab? How can anyone forecast their life that far into the future? Currently, I don’t see myself wanting to run a lab, but this is because I think seeing patients daily full-time could be so fun, but it may ultimately be “repetitive and boring” as my MD-PhD mentors have mentioned. Furthermore, (maybe this is weird) I rather be a post-doc than a PI because it feels less lonely. Doing lab work in bays alongside everyone else seems way more appealing than being stuffed in an office, but then again, maybe when I get older, to have people doing work for me and having peace of mind could be appealing. I truly feel like I don’t have enough information to make this choice right now. How the heck does anyone know? I am only 23 years old.
- Have done research for 4 years full-time
- 11+ publications and first-authors in high impact journals (30+ impact factors)
- Sad leaving lab now as I am stepping away from a productive time
I brought up applying internally because I feel dishonest not displaying the extreme commitment to an MD/PhD as everyone else seems to have (or maybe I am just one to express my concerns more so…). I am very low-income so I am pretty sure I am eligible for full tuition scholarships at all my MSTPs. I feel that it's somewhat better to take this day by day and during my research year (which I will most definitely take), after having done some clinical rotations, decide then to apply internally. Does this seem backwards? I just worry about dropping out of an MSTP midway as it hurts the program’s stats, it may affect my Dean’s letter, and my shot at academic residencies.
Thoughts?
Edit: People have also mentioned the mental toll of friends starting their clinical pathway or them making actual salary. I don't know how this will affect me. Many of my friends are software engineers making 300k+ and the only way that has affected me is that I get them to cover drinks. Other than that, I am happy with my tech salary!
I have read numerous threads on students dropping their PhD and @Neuronix 's perspective on the journey as well. People state that if you don’t want to run a lab, then don’t do the PhD. How does any MD/PhD know this? Are people banking on the fact they won’t enjoy clinical rotations as much as lab? How can anyone forecast their life that far into the future? Currently, I don’t see myself wanting to run a lab, but this is because I think seeing patients daily full-time could be so fun, but it may ultimately be “repetitive and boring” as my MD-PhD mentors have mentioned. Furthermore, (maybe this is weird) I rather be a post-doc than a PI because it feels less lonely. Doing lab work in bays alongside everyone else seems way more appealing than being stuffed in an office, but then again, maybe when I get older, to have people doing work for me and having peace of mind could be appealing. I truly feel like I don’t have enough information to make this choice right now. How the heck does anyone know? I am only 23 years old.
I am very low-income so I am pretty sure I am eligible for full tuition scholarships at all my MSTPs. I feel that it's somewhat better to take this day by day and during my research year (which I will most definitely take), after having done some clinical rotations, decide then to apply internally. Does this seem backwards? I just worry about dropping out of an MSTP midway as it hurts the program’s stats, it may affect my Dean’s letter, and my shot at academic residencies.