I was in your position a year ago and found myself doing the first option you stated (though reversed), full-time research + non-clinical and clinical volunteering. It worked out great because my time off was enriched with many experiences. This allowed me to write substantive letters of updates to schools and I had a lot to talk about during interviews. For that reason, I support the first option posted.
Here's the thing: research is not required for medical school. Plenty of people have been accepted without doing it. Since you have never done research before and don't know whether you would like it, I would find a volunteer research position to test the waters. Working in a lab is normally a HUGE commitment, but volunteering can take away some of that pressure. I understand it would be tough to fit this into your schedule, but you could possibly quit your current undesired job and find a new one. This would also take away the dilemma of missing your family events.