Any other D4s seriously depressed/anxious?

[ddsOS]

I've been having a really rough D4 year. Feel like I'm never going to make my requirements and feeling a lot of stress and anxiety over the outcomes of some major treatments for patients. I feel like on a personal level I'm good with my patients. I have multiple patients who swear by me and I've had others specifically request me in other areas of the school where the student they get is random. But no matter how many texts or calls I get gushing about how compassionate, understanding, or skilled I am, the negative moments where professors are getting upset with you or telling you you're not good are so much more powerful. Add on the extra stress of wondering if a patient will like/be able to use the treatment you provide (dentures for ex) and it's an incredibly easy for me to get stuck in negativity for weeks on end.

I feel trapped knowing that I have yet to complete X requirement and that the only thing that will get me out is by my own actions and force of will. To be completely honest, yes, I have suicidal thoughts a lot these days. I'm far away from my friends and family, and I hate being where I am. I want my degree and then I want to get the **** out of this place. I'm on medication and I'm trying to utilize all of the resources I have (school provides counseling) but it's not enough.

The funniest part of all this is that my habits are generally healthy. I'm exercising six times a week for at least an hour and I'm eating healthy. Trying to spend what time I have not cooking, exercising, or reviewing on my hobbies and friends. The one thing that I could improve on right now is my sleep but given all the stress im under idk how easy that will be. So, any other D4s hating life and school right now? Please tell me I'm not the only one in a deep dark hole right now.

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[Allthebags]

This too will pass my friend. Sounds very similar to my experience around this time of D4 year. You've got to learn to separate your professional life from your personal one – at the end of the day, this is just a job. Do the best you can, but beyond that, who cares if the patient uses your denture the way you want them to or not? If you've done a good job with a filling, crown, extraction, etc – pat yourself on the back and move on. And if you haven't – learn from your mistakes, apply them next time, and still move on. Your dental school professors will be extremely irrelevant to your life by as soon as this summer for the most part. Hell, I graduated 2.5 years ago and barely remember the names of instructors on my clinic floor. The reality is, you WILL graduate, you'll get your degree, and you'll look back at these times and be grateful for the lessons you've learned. Dental school sucks, senioritis sucks, but life on the other side is much better.

 

[ddsOS]

Thank you. I've done some decent fillings and I've improved a lot in terms of extractions. Crowns I'm still trying to get the hang of (not many opportunities on my patient list) but I do feel proud knowing I went from 0 experience and 0 confidence to where I am now.

As for the denture patients, I'm just very skittish when it comes to dentures, especially immediates, because I know how embarrassing and difficult it can be to lose all your teeth, go through the whole process, only to get something that doesn't work. I feel like it's a situation where they have every right to be upset

This too will pass my friend. Sounds very similar to my experience around this time of D4 year. You've got to learn to separate your professional life from your personal one – at the end of the day, this is just a job. Do the best you can, but beyond that, who cares if the patient uses your denture the way you want them to or not? If you've done a good job with a filling, crown, extraction, etc – pat yourself on the back and move on. And if you haven't – learn from your mistakes, apply them next time, and still move on. Your dental school professors will be extremely irrelevant to your life by as soon as this summer for the most part. Hell, I graduated 2.5 years ago and barely remember the names of instructors on my clinic floor. The reality is, you WILL graduate, you'll get your degree, and you'll look back at these times and be grateful for the lessons you've learned. Dental school sucks, senioritis sucks, but life on the other side is much better.

 

[Gen. Beauregard]

It sounds like you're putting the patient's burden on yourself. As a conscientious person, you want to do the best job possible, and you blame yourself when it doesn't work out. Congratulations on not being a psychopath 🙂. Any similarly minded, non-psychopath will be able to pick up on that from you. You'll be a good doctor who is constantly improving, and your patients will stick with you because they can trust you. The unfortunate gray area with removable is that sometimes "it is what it is". It's not anyone's fault, it's just the reality of their new normal. Hell, you didn't do it, let alone set out to do it, it's just how it is. As far as immediates are concerned, remember, you're inserting a new denture onto what amounts to a swollen and bloody gravel road. You won't have the satisfaction of the nice new reline in 6 months on stable tissue because you're in school and it's not the real world. Don't sweat the instructors. With time and distance you'll gain perspective and laugh about them. You're in good company as far as D4 goes. Keep your head up, you're on the home stretch, you can see the light at the end of the tunnel and pretty soon you'll be stepping out into fresh air and sunshine.