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- Feb 5, 2010
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So...
I am sure this topic has come up a million times before, but anyone out there (current 4th years, residents, attendings) that did poorly on step 1, but still made it into a field they were interested in?
If so, what did you do to help out your residency apps? Any advice would be great.
My situation : Typical mid-west school. Did ok through med I/II, lettered in a few things, did research, overall nothing stellar and nothing bad, attributed some of that to problems with depression (organic causes; end of a loooong term relationship of 8 years, and death of a sibling who was very supportive). Studied for step 1, seemed to be in the average-above average range of things. Nerves were pretty racked the day of the exam (had only been able to sleep ~3 hours combined the two nights before the exam). Took it. Time was not an issue. Waited nervously for weeks.
Got my score....189/77...ouch.
Contemplated dropping out.
Decided I was too interested to see if I would enjoy 3rd year and all the clinical experiences. Anything had to be better than med I/II right (..zzzz..)?
So far have done fairly average in my clinical rotations.
Trouble is, it is time to start thinking about scheduling for 4th year...stress..
I haven't hated anything (well, IM rounds kind of bore me, to tears). But overall I think I have been able to find the positives/interesting parts of each rotation and view the experience as such.
The two areas I have felt most intense about have been General Surgery and Psych. I know. Odd combo. Of the two, Gen Surg really stood out to me. I love the material..all the classic surgical topics, hands on procedures, concise rounding, and it gave me that proud/motivated feeling to think about working in the field. Psych on the other hand, besides the fact that every day seems very different, appeals to my "social aspect" side. I am very interested in substance abuse and mental health issues. I liked that you can actually spend time with patients getting to know them, and actually trying to build a trusting relationship. Not to mention all the attendings I encountered (and residents) were fairly happy, well adjusted, smart, fun people, who still seemed to have time to enjoy life.
My problem now is
A) The obvious. A bad step 1 score will make Surgical (or really any) programs run for the hills. Attendings have voiced that to me, in spite of thinking I did well on their service, that I gave good presentations, was very interested, had no qualms about staying late, and did very well when pimped. Even on Psych although I did well, my attending seemed to take two steps back when I approached this topic. Obviously I would at least be a little more of a consideration for a Psych program. But generally my problem has been received in the same way.
B) These reactions have really set me back, and have once again made me question whether or not I should continue to move forward with my studies. Not a good mindset to be in. It is making me feel like even though I have kept on trucking and done decent, the bitter reality (and label) is just always around me despite having a good attitude. All of the advice I have sought has either been negative, in terms of "sorry, you just didn't do well, and therefore you are not competitive for this or that", or really just misguiding (consider a specialty you think you will match into...bad advice).
C) Loans...I know some are lucky enough to not have them. But more than half of current students are in my position. Reliant on them. As of right now I am ~$160k in debt. If I finish school I will be somewhere between $220-240k. Given my situation, which I think is referred to as "a rock and a hard place", I am pretty confused. Big money was never really a driving goal for me, but this Sisyphean boulder in the form of loans is really complicating my decisions. Loan payments of ~$2000 a month, if one is not earning a "doctor's wage", are no joke. To even be able to live normally (say $36-48k per year) I would have to earn $60-72k per year.
Do I keep the boat afloat and just finish out as well as possible? I know a decent step 2 score can be somewhat redeeming, but it is not a fix-all. I had a friend who was a few years ahead of me who was in a similar boat and didn't match on his first try. Ended up having a pretty rough year (unemployed) reapplying for the match, only to end up in a specialty he wasn't really passionate about (and is subsequently thinking about leaving medicine). I do not want to end up applying to something out of necessity, because I know myself, and know that would be the same case for me.
Any advice would be great!
I am sure this topic has come up a million times before, but anyone out there (current 4th years, residents, attendings) that did poorly on step 1, but still made it into a field they were interested in?
If so, what did you do to help out your residency apps? Any advice would be great.
My situation : Typical mid-west school. Did ok through med I/II, lettered in a few things, did research, overall nothing stellar and nothing bad, attributed some of that to problems with depression (organic causes; end of a loooong term relationship of 8 years, and death of a sibling who was very supportive). Studied for step 1, seemed to be in the average-above average range of things. Nerves were pretty racked the day of the exam (had only been able to sleep ~3 hours combined the two nights before the exam). Took it. Time was not an issue. Waited nervously for weeks.
Got my score....189/77...ouch.
Contemplated dropping out.
Decided I was too interested to see if I would enjoy 3rd year and all the clinical experiences. Anything had to be better than med I/II right (..zzzz..)?
So far have done fairly average in my clinical rotations.
Trouble is, it is time to start thinking about scheduling for 4th year...stress..
I haven't hated anything (well, IM rounds kind of bore me, to tears). But overall I think I have been able to find the positives/interesting parts of each rotation and view the experience as such.
The two areas I have felt most intense about have been General Surgery and Psych. I know. Odd combo. Of the two, Gen Surg really stood out to me. I love the material..all the classic surgical topics, hands on procedures, concise rounding, and it gave me that proud/motivated feeling to think about working in the field. Psych on the other hand, besides the fact that every day seems very different, appeals to my "social aspect" side. I am very interested in substance abuse and mental health issues. I liked that you can actually spend time with patients getting to know them, and actually trying to build a trusting relationship. Not to mention all the attendings I encountered (and residents) were fairly happy, well adjusted, smart, fun people, who still seemed to have time to enjoy life.
My problem now is
A) The obvious. A bad step 1 score will make Surgical (or really any) programs run for the hills. Attendings have voiced that to me, in spite of thinking I did well on their service, that I gave good presentations, was very interested, had no qualms about staying late, and did very well when pimped. Even on Psych although I did well, my attending seemed to take two steps back when I approached this topic. Obviously I would at least be a little more of a consideration for a Psych program. But generally my problem has been received in the same way.
B) These reactions have really set me back, and have once again made me question whether or not I should continue to move forward with my studies. Not a good mindset to be in. It is making me feel like even though I have kept on trucking and done decent, the bitter reality (and label) is just always around me despite having a good attitude. All of the advice I have sought has either been negative, in terms of "sorry, you just didn't do well, and therefore you are not competitive for this or that", or really just misguiding (consider a specialty you think you will match into...bad advice).
C) Loans...I know some are lucky enough to not have them. But more than half of current students are in my position. Reliant on them. As of right now I am ~$160k in debt. If I finish school I will be somewhere between $220-240k. Given my situation, which I think is referred to as "a rock and a hard place", I am pretty confused. Big money was never really a driving goal for me, but this Sisyphean boulder in the form of loans is really complicating my decisions. Loan payments of ~$2000 a month, if one is not earning a "doctor's wage", are no joke. To even be able to live normally (say $36-48k per year) I would have to earn $60-72k per year.
Do I keep the boat afloat and just finish out as well as possible? I know a decent step 2 score can be somewhat redeeming, but it is not a fix-all. I had a friend who was a few years ahead of me who was in a similar boat and didn't match on his first try. Ended up having a pretty rough year (unemployed) reapplying for the match, only to end up in a specialty he wasn't really passionate about (and is subsequently thinking about leaving medicine). I do not want to end up applying to something out of necessity, because I know myself, and know that would be the same case for me.
Any advice would be great!