That isn't completely true. Mood stabilizers are commonly used in pregancy, but it is a risk benefit thing. A woman with one manic episode a decade ago should be weaned off if planning to conceive. However, a severe bipolar patient should be kept on. A patient with some mood stabilizers is a more hospital home for a fetus than a dead patient.
As far as management, lithium increases the risk of ebsteins by 20x. Which means the chance is still something like 1:1000. Not very high if you ask me. Try treating patients with very low dose though. For anticonvulsants, 4mg folic acid daily to reduce NTDs. Again, risk vs benefit.