consequences of accepting at two places

[greenpepper]

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i'm in a really really tough situation. i recently accepted at an institution via email but have not sent in my deposit. at the time, it was my favorite out of all the places i had interviewed with, so i was very excited to be going there. just a few days later, i received an urgent email from a very prestigious school explaining that they were sorry for the delay and wanted to know if i was still interested in their program. they explained that my application got lost, but that they consider me a top candidate. i'm not sure how much i actually buy "lost my application," but in the end, i didn't really care. i was fairly certain i was going to still go to my first institution because on the surface, their reserach interests seemed to be a better fit for me. however, i decided to meet with a few profs at the second institution just to check it out. i assumed there would be other applicants coming that day, but it turned out it was just me. after the meeting, i realized that this new program is an even better fit for me AND the funding is remarkable. i'm angry that i wasn't invited to the real interview weekend with this second institution so that at least i would have known i was still being considered, but at the time of my acceptance, i had to assume i was rejected because the weekend had passed weeks before.

WHAT DO I DO??? im so upset. i've heard of horrible things happening to students who accept and then renig where the new institution takes back the offer in defference to the first and then you have no place to go!!! i understand the gravity of the situation and the questionable integrity, but i have worked WAY too hard to be here to sacrifice my education, career, and future opportunities based on an ill-informed committment. it concerns me that i would make enemies, but it concerns me even more to be left in the cold with no place to go next year.

what is protocol? what have you heard of happnening in this sort of situation?? please advise!!!

 

[PhDToBe]

APA guidelines state that an applicant can rescind an acceptance until April 15th. You're in an even better spot, because you did not sign anything. You can go to the second school. The first school might not like what you've done, but you'll be helping someone on the waitlist out.

Also, I am going to PM you..

 

[ygolohcysp]

Hi there,

First off, I am so sorry that happened to you-- that is absolutely a nightmare. I don't really know what the proper protocol is, but I can tell you what happened to a friend of mine in a similar position last year. She did a phone interview with school A, and then flew out for an in-person interview for school B. School B was her hands down top choice, but following the interview they informed her that they ended up only having funding for one student, and that they were going to take a current RA. She was understandably upset, but she had an acceptance from school A, so she committed to school A. This all happened mid- March, and then the beginning of April comes around, and school B calls her to say they found money, and they could take her on. She was so confused about what to do, and she decided to stay with her commitment to school A. Unfortunately, she does not love this school, and is trying to get through as quickly as possible. I think if she had to choose all over again, she would have made the risky decision to back out of her commitment to school A, and gone to her ultimate school B.

This may have just added to your confusion, but hopefully it is a good example of this happening to someone, and what they chose to do. I do not envy your position at all! Good luck with everything, I'm sure you'll end up where you are supposed to be (for whatever reason)!

:-/

 

[deleted176373]

This is an easy one... I actually have been in this exact same position (nearly). It was late March and I told Texas A&M that I would be attending, after receiving a "firm" rejection from USUHS, my favorite program. April 12th I received a call asking me if I was still interested in attending USUHS. Not only YES, but HELL YA!

Per APA graduate school guidelines, any decisions AFTER April 15th are final, those made before April 15th are NOT binding. So I called up Texas A&M and thanked them for considering me but that I would have to withdraw my initial acceptance of their offer. I told them that I appreciated their generous offer, but that the offer I received was from my number one choice and that I really could not in good conscience not go to a program that was a better match for me. They wished me the best of luck as I did for them and told them that I would follow up with a letter in writing. They stated that there was no need to do so, but I did anyway. I sent it with delivery confirmation and saved a copy for myself.

I recommend that you act in your own best self-interest and remember that decisions are only binding AFTER April 15th. Before that date, no harm, no foul.

Mark

 

[greenpepper]

THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR WONDERFUL ADVICE!!! I am sooooo happy I know about this forum. I welcome more if anyone has more to offer.

Much love and luck to all!

greenpep

 

[psychanon]

I'm just echoing everyone else, but please take the offer that is best for you. It's honorable of you to want to keep your commitment, but honestly, this is a huge decision that will affect your life for years to come. You don't want to end up in ygolohcysp's friend's position just so you can keep your word-- that's both not the right thing for you nor (ultimately) the right thing for the program. Plus, since you mentioned having to send in a deposit at the first place.....if it is not funded, then reneging on an acceptance is not quite as big a deal. And if the second place is funded....you know what the best choice is here. Congratulations-- you are very lucky!

 

[ILGirl]

As everyone has mentioned, you can do this.

In my acceptance packet, there was some information on this topic. According to the letter in the packet, the APA guidelines state that you need to get a release from the school that you originally accepted prior to accepting another offer.

What the release entails? I do not know.