Depressing Jokes from Older Folks

[ishaninatte]

I've been confronted by this situation a number of times, so I thought I'd throw it out on SDN to see what kind of input I get.

Ok, so you are talking to an older person, whether they be a relative, patient, or friend, and they begin to make jokes, or comment, about how few the years are that they have left alive. Even if it's a genuinely funny joke, it sucks to laugh because they're talking about their own mortality. It's not that dying should be taken totally serious all the time, it's just that I feel uncomfortable laughing in those situations. I think it'd be best to illustrate with a couple examples, and folks out there on the interweb can weigh in with the proper responses.


#1) Conversation with Grandfather:

A: I'm not really seeing anyone right now, and I've been thinking of taking a 'dating break' since I've been so busy lately.

G: That's a good idea, you keep working hard at school. I probably won't be around to meet your wife anyways.

A: (response?)


#2) Conversation with Older Patient

OP: I was considered pretty wild not so long ago. If I were ten years younger I'd show you a good time. If I were ten years older, I'd be dead.

A: (response?)

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[tank you]

i know what u mean, usually i dont respond or i change the subject

 

[CircleTheDrain]

Its not hard!



#1) Conversation with Grandfather:

A: I'm not really seeing anyone right now, and I've been thinking of taking a 'dating break' since I've been so busy lately.

G: That's a good idea, you keep working hard at school. I probably won't be around to meet your wife anyways.

A: (response?) What! I do plan on getting married within the next twenty years you know!


#2) Conversation with Older Patient

OP: I was considered pretty wild not so long ago. If I were ten years younger I'd show you a good time. If I were ten years older, I'd be dead.

A: (response?) So at this stage in your life I can out run you? 😉

 

[Hoberto]

Its not hard!



#1) Conversation with Grandfather:

A: I'm not really seeing anyone right now, and I've been thinking of taking a 'dating break' since I've been so busy lately.

G: That's a good idea, you keep working hard at school. I probably won't be around to meet your wife anyways.

A: (response?) What! I do plan on getting married within the next twenty years you know!


#2) Conversation with Older Patient

OP: I was considered pretty wild not so long ago. If I were ten years younger I'd show you a good time. If I were ten years older, I'd be dead.

A: (response?) So at this stage in your life I can out run you? 😉

These are the perfect responses. Usually, not always, when people behave like this they are trying to bring you down or push their own depression\jealousy\remorse\guilt\whatever on you. Don't fall for it. Make a funny remark and move on.

If the person is genuinely upset that's a different matter, but not something for you to fix.

 

[PineappleGirl]

My usual reply to this stuff is "awwwww, no, stop" and then a quick change of the subject to something nice and happy in the present.