- Joined
- Feb 11, 2006
- Messages
- 3
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I've always wanted a place to tell doctors how to properly dictate - and here I find you! Pay attention or you'll be... dictating... for... speech... recognition... so.... you .... can.... save... money.... (or watching a computer screen instead of your patient as you point and click your way through an EMR - but hey, what's a little of your time worth? It only takes 2x longer than dictation).
When dictating...
Never ever learn how to use the "pause" button of any recording device. In spite of the fact that transcriptionists get paid by the characters that show up on the finished document - and not the dictated minute - they won't mind a bit as you talk to your co-workers, the patient, the pizza delivery boy, answer the phone, cough, sneeze and/or yawn. If possible, make sure some of the conversation includes at least one reference to the stupid person who types up your reports and how many mistakes they make.
You will earn brownie points for asking the person next to you how to use the "pause" feature. You will not earn brownie points if you take their advice: "I don't know - I never use it."
When using a portable device, it's perfectly acceptable to go to the bathroom or have sex without turning the recorder off or - amazingly - stopping your dictation. After all, we SHOULD be able to figure out that the "oh baby," "don't stop," and "I'm coming" aren't part of the patient record.
Make sure if you have a patient whose name is "Smith" or "Jones" that you spell it. These are difficult names that are often misspelled. Likewise, there's no need to spell the name of the referring physician who lives 150 miles away and whose name sound like "Rotisserian or something like that," especially if you have the chart in front of you.
If the patient tells you they take "peanutbutterballs," there's no need for you to clarify with them further. By all means, dictate "peanutbutterballs" as a current medication - we'll have no trouble figuring out what the patient means, even if you can't.
Never stop dictating when you're yawning. You'll save yourself a good 10 seconds and get home much faster.
Absolutely, your grammar, punctuation and spelling are far superior because you have more diplomas than I have, but I will draw the line at deliberately misspelling words just so you can always be right.
You should know that if you take pride in how fast you can talk when you dictate, somewhere there are transcriptionists wondering if this pride extends to how fast you can finish the sex act.
You're working at a 600-bed facility that generates enough dictation to keep 100 people busy (and that's only if it's not sent to India, in which case there are 300 people being kept busy). Assume the same person will always transcribe your dictation, so don't worry if you rush through your "usual" review of systems, past medical history, and exam - they've heard it before and will know exactly what you mean.
Mumble, stumble and bumble your way through a dictation. Take 15 minutes to say what could have and should have been said in 5, then tell a couple jokes - everyone will laugh. Really.
If the ambient noise level is loud, don't tell anyone to quiet down and never, ever move to a quieter area. Either talk louder and hope you can be heard above the noise, or cup your hand around the mouthpiece and whisper.
Cell phones are great inventions if you can't get a handheld recorder. Don't forget to keep right on dictating even when you notice you've lost signal through the tunnel and around the airport. Make sure you complain about the number of blanks left by the stupid transcriptionist.
Three pages is NOT a "brief history of present illness."
There's a nasty habit in transcription known as "cherry picking." That's when the worst dictators are passed over on purpose because nobody wants their production pay impacted by the worst dictators. If you ever find you're one of the dictators being passed over by the cherry pickers, make sure you have a friend with you when you go out to the parking lot.
When dictating...
Never ever learn how to use the "pause" button of any recording device. In spite of the fact that transcriptionists get paid by the characters that show up on the finished document - and not the dictated minute - they won't mind a bit as you talk to your co-workers, the patient, the pizza delivery boy, answer the phone, cough, sneeze and/or yawn. If possible, make sure some of the conversation includes at least one reference to the stupid person who types up your reports and how many mistakes they make.
You will earn brownie points for asking the person next to you how to use the "pause" feature. You will not earn brownie points if you take their advice: "I don't know - I never use it."
When using a portable device, it's perfectly acceptable to go to the bathroom or have sex without turning the recorder off or - amazingly - stopping your dictation. After all, we SHOULD be able to figure out that the "oh baby," "don't stop," and "I'm coming" aren't part of the patient record.
Make sure if you have a patient whose name is "Smith" or "Jones" that you spell it. These are difficult names that are often misspelled. Likewise, there's no need to spell the name of the referring physician who lives 150 miles away and whose name sound like "Rotisserian or something like that," especially if you have the chart in front of you.
If the patient tells you they take "peanutbutterballs," there's no need for you to clarify with them further. By all means, dictate "peanutbutterballs" as a current medication - we'll have no trouble figuring out what the patient means, even if you can't.
Never stop dictating when you're yawning. You'll save yourself a good 10 seconds and get home much faster.
Absolutely, your grammar, punctuation and spelling are far superior because you have more diplomas than I have, but I will draw the line at deliberately misspelling words just so you can always be right.
You should know that if you take pride in how fast you can talk when you dictate, somewhere there are transcriptionists wondering if this pride extends to how fast you can finish the sex act.
You're working at a 600-bed facility that generates enough dictation to keep 100 people busy (and that's only if it's not sent to India, in which case there are 300 people being kept busy). Assume the same person will always transcribe your dictation, so don't worry if you rush through your "usual" review of systems, past medical history, and exam - they've heard it before and will know exactly what you mean.
Mumble, stumble and bumble your way through a dictation. Take 15 minutes to say what could have and should have been said in 5, then tell a couple jokes - everyone will laugh. Really.
If the ambient noise level is loud, don't tell anyone to quiet down and never, ever move to a quieter area. Either talk louder and hope you can be heard above the noise, or cup your hand around the mouthpiece and whisper.
Cell phones are great inventions if you can't get a handheld recorder. Don't forget to keep right on dictating even when you notice you've lost signal through the tunnel and around the airport. Make sure you complain about the number of blanks left by the stupid transcriptionist.
Three pages is NOT a "brief history of present illness."
There's a nasty habit in transcription known as "cherry picking." That's when the worst dictators are passed over on purpose because nobody wants their production pay impacted by the worst dictators. If you ever find you're one of the dictators being passed over by the cherry pickers, make sure you have a friend with you when you go out to the parking lot.