Error in personal statement :(

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flagellamonster

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Through teaching, I hone the communication skills and empathy I will someday use to explain conditions to patients and reduce their confusion and feel more in control of their body.

I know I can't change anything but is it horrible to read?

Should have been...
Through teaching, I hone the communication skills and empathy I will someday use to explain conditions to patients and reduce their confusion.
 
Nothing you can change now. No point whining about it. As long as you show you can articulate your language at an interview, you should be fine.
 
Although it's not terrible, it is a bit ambiguous. How are you learning empathy through teaching? And feel more in control of their body is coming off as a bit power hungry.
 
My advice- always be direct on your PS. Don't add fluff. That sentence sounds like a load of extra words that didn't need to be there.
 
Depends how good your ps is. I think if you had a great ps and one odd sentence it would be fine. Did you have anyone else read it before submitting?
 
Can one hone empathy? That sounds so strange to me...

Even the intended version of that sentence seems a bit bulky. Regardless, I wouldn't worry about this. It is out of your control. Just remember there is beauty in brevity.
 
It's clumsy, but nowhere near as bad as when I see "and that''s why I want to attend KYCOM" .....the problem being my school isn't KYCOM. I tend to skewer interviewees when I see that.




Through teaching, I hone the communication skills and empathy I will someday use to explain conditions to patients and reduce their confusion and feel more in control of their body.

I know I can't change anything but is it horrible to read?

Should have been...
Through teaching, I hone the communication skills and empathy I will someday use to explain conditions to patients and reduce their confusion.
 
This is why you shouldn't go back and analyze your app after it's been submitted. You will drive yourself crazy when you identify mistakes. Either that or make sure that you've proofread your app MULTIPLE times prior to submitting it. My PS/activity descriptions were the first thing that I did, and when I went to work on my app I read over them at least two or three times every day to make sure I didn't have any mistakes. I was still catching the occasional error a few days after I started. It's hard to identify mistakes with writing that you're very familiar with.
 
It's clumsy, but nowhere near as bad as when I see "and that''s why I want to attend KYCOM" .....the problem being my school isn't KYCOM. I tend to skewer interviewees when I see that.

Skewer? If I was wearing boots... I would be shaking in them.
 
It's clumsy, but nowhere near as bad as when I see "and that''s why I want to attend KYCOM" .....the problem being my school isn't KYCOM. I tend to skewer interviewees when I see that.

Listen up, applicants. This is the most common and most deadly error you can make in a secondary. Be very, very careful if you re-work a secondary essay and use it for another school or if you have secondary essays ready to cut & paste into a secondary and accidentally use the wrong one.

Also, double check the spelling of the name of the school -- attention to detail is important.
 
2x listen up, future doctors. Malpractice lawyers grow fat and rich on these types of mistakes in Medicine.

I've even seen them in the PS!

Listen up, applicants. This is the most common and most deadly error you can make in a secondary. Be very, very careful if you re-work a secondary essay and use it for another school or if you have secondary essays ready to cut & paste into a secondary and accidentally use the wrong one.

Also, double check the spelling of the name of the school -- attention to detail is important.
 
I had a blatant misspelling in the second sentence that was missed by two proofreaders and myself, but here I am in med school. You can't change it now, don't worry about it.
 
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