flatsilver
New Member
- Joined
- Aug 8, 2018
- Messages
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Feel free to read, reply, or not read and reply, but please do not reply with anything that says I do not need to go to a top school or questioning why I want to go to a top school, I've heard it all and I've defended myself against it all. This is an honest post, with an honest question, and I'm honestly tired of everything/my current life. And to those who say I'm doing fine, thank you, go ahead call me neurotic if you want, but I'd like to do much better. I definitely see points of improvement and red flags, especially for top schools and MD/PhD, and I'd like to address them. I had a plan but I underestimated the job market.
I graduated last year, took the MCAT this January, and I am currently a scribe at an outpatient clinic for typically a maximum of 20 hours/week (since ~3 months). The rest of my time I dedicate to non-clinical volunteering, shadowing, mainly job searching, or family matters. I kind of dread being a scribe because it was my intent to do research for my 2 remaining gap years (I apply next year) and that's what I want to do because I believe that will be the best for my application + career plans (see below*).
I've been searching for an academic research position for about 7 months. I've applied to 100+ entry-level academic positions (bench and clinical), and done about 30 phone interviews and about 10 in-person interviews. No offer...kind of, I was given an offer via email 3 months ago but then the PI said "nevermind" and gave it the graduating undergrad in the lab.
I personally think my interviews aren't the problem. I believe I am able to answer all their questions, provide examples when appropriate, never awkward silent moment, speak about my previous experiences, and talk about what I can bring to the lab. Out of the non-silent rejections and feedback I've gotten, it was always someone with more experience chosen over me, Master's degree, interned at the lab, had 1-2 more years of experience, had experience with more relevant lab techniques or data collection, etc. My most recent interview, which I thought I had a great chance, the PI invited me for 3 rounds of interviews, told me he had already rejected the other candidates after the 2nd round, but eventually gave it to someone who was a volunteer in the lab. I've also been to 5 scribe interviews and received 5 offers. I am open to the possibility that the fault lies with my interviews, but I'm not sure.
I've also emailed 40+ different labs asking to be a volunteer/intern in their lab. I received two interviews, one of them said they don't usually take premeds after finding out I'm premed and the other just simply said they didn't have space after the interview. I can't even work for free for crying out loud.
*Why do I want to do research so badly? Well, for multiple reasons. 1.) First and maybe most important reason is that I would very much like to get into a top MD school. 2.) Second, I plan on going into academic medicine and will apply to MD/PhD, however I'm thinking of giving up on the MD/PhD as of late. 3.) Third, a red flag on my application is that I do not have a letter from my past PI with who I worked 2 years/800 hours. I never had much interaction with the PI and the grad student is pissed off at me. And I honestly don't think top schools, especially MSTP programs, will let this slide. I'd like to get a letter from a PI to hopefully mend the weakness on my app. 4.) Fourth, I'd like a publication. I know it isn't necessary, but I'd like at least a shot at one to spice up my cookie cutter ECs. If it means anything to you guys, during my job search and interviews I came across two PIs who are MSTP adcom and they agree for more prestigious MSTP the lack of publication is a relative disadvantage. It becomes less of a disadvantage as you move down the rankings. They also both agreed that my research experience isn't quite up to par.
The question is, what do I do now? Do I transfer to another scribe location for more hours and give up on research/PI letter? Do I keep searching for academic research? Do I apply to industry jobs and forget the hope for publications and maybe even the PI letter of rec? Try for a new "wow-factor"?
tl;dr - I want to try my best for a top school, and I understand it is never guaranteed but I want my app to be as strong as possible. However, I don't think my research is up to par, especially for MD/PhD. No letter from PI, no significant contributions worthy of a top school. My ECs don't have a wow-factor. I'm on my second gap year, which were dedicated to getting quality research in the first place, spent 7 months looking for a research job, no offers and now I'm a scribe. I feel miserable and regret taking the gap year because it isn't as productive as I intended. Help. What do I do in this situation? How can I improve my app and make the most of my gap years?
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I graduated last year, took the MCAT this January, and I am currently a scribe at an outpatient clinic for typically a maximum of 20 hours/week (since ~3 months). The rest of my time I dedicate to non-clinical volunteering, shadowing, mainly job searching, or family matters. I kind of dread being a scribe because it was my intent to do research for my 2 remaining gap years (I apply next year) and that's what I want to do because I believe that will be the best for my application + career plans (see below*).
I've been searching for an academic research position for about 7 months. I've applied to 100+ entry-level academic positions (bench and clinical), and done about 30 phone interviews and about 10 in-person interviews. No offer...kind of, I was given an offer via email 3 months ago but then the PI said "nevermind" and gave it the graduating undergrad in the lab.
I personally think my interviews aren't the problem. I believe I am able to answer all their questions, provide examples when appropriate, never awkward silent moment, speak about my previous experiences, and talk about what I can bring to the lab. Out of the non-silent rejections and feedback I've gotten, it was always someone with more experience chosen over me, Master's degree, interned at the lab, had 1-2 more years of experience, had experience with more relevant lab techniques or data collection, etc. My most recent interview, which I thought I had a great chance, the PI invited me for 3 rounds of interviews, told me he had already rejected the other candidates after the 2nd round, but eventually gave it to someone who was a volunteer in the lab. I've also been to 5 scribe interviews and received 5 offers. I am open to the possibility that the fault lies with my interviews, but I'm not sure.
I've also emailed 40+ different labs asking to be a volunteer/intern in their lab. I received two interviews, one of them said they don't usually take premeds after finding out I'm premed and the other just simply said they didn't have space after the interview. I can't even work for free for crying out loud.
*Why do I want to do research so badly? Well, for multiple reasons. 1.) First and maybe most important reason is that I would very much like to get into a top MD school. 2.) Second, I plan on going into academic medicine and will apply to MD/PhD, however I'm thinking of giving up on the MD/PhD as of late. 3.) Third, a red flag on my application is that I do not have a letter from my past PI with who I worked 2 years/800 hours. I never had much interaction with the PI and the grad student is pissed off at me. And I honestly don't think top schools, especially MSTP programs, will let this slide. I'd like to get a letter from a PI to hopefully mend the weakness on my app. 4.) Fourth, I'd like a publication. I know it isn't necessary, but I'd like at least a shot at one to spice up my cookie cutter ECs. If it means anything to you guys, during my job search and interviews I came across two PIs who are MSTP adcom and they agree for more prestigious MSTP the lack of publication is a relative disadvantage. It becomes less of a disadvantage as you move down the rankings. They also both agreed that my research experience isn't quite up to par.
The question is, what do I do now? Do I transfer to another scribe location for more hours and give up on research/PI letter? Do I keep searching for academic research? Do I apply to industry jobs and forget the hope for publications and maybe even the PI letter of rec? Try for a new "wow-factor"?
tl;dr - I want to try my best for a top school, and I understand it is never guaranteed but I want my app to be as strong as possible. However, I don't think my research is up to par, especially for MD/PhD. No letter from PI, no significant contributions worthy of a top school. My ECs don't have a wow-factor. I'm on my second gap year, which were dedicated to getting quality research in the first place, spent 7 months looking for a research job, no offers and now I'm a scribe. I feel miserable and regret taking the gap year because it isn't as productive as I intended. Help. What do I do in this situation? How can I improve my app and make the most of my gap years?
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