Help! Rejecting offer after accepting it

[polarbearscafe]

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I have accepted an offer and rejected another offer yesterday, but since then I had extreme uneasiness and I kind of regret my decision. I fear that other school that I rejected may have been a better option. I was wondering if what my options are and the consequences. Right now I am not sure if the school I rejected has extended other offers and I am not sure if it is possible to reject an offer after accepting it (the school I accepted will be very unhappy regardless).

This is a really distressing situation for me and I understand the severity of any actions I might take. I am not necessarily going to change my decision, but any help and advice is really appreciated.

 

[temppsych123]

The sooner you deal with this issue, the better. You may be SOL with the place you rejected (e.g., if the faculty member you would have worked with has already extended an offer to another person, they're unlikely to want to retract their second offer to be able to take you now), but if you catch the person before they make another offer, you might have a shot, depending, of course, on why you're changing your mind, whether the person feels sympathetic for you, how much they wanted you in the first place, etc. Either way, you're right, it won't look good, but I guess if you've already made up your mind to try to take back the rejection, do it soon. And deal with that side of things before dealing with the acceptance (e.g., don't tell the place you accepted that you rescind your acceptance until you know if the place you rejected is still willing/able/interested in taking you).

 

[deleted343839]

If I recall correctly, you had two attractive offers from reputable programs. Whatever you decide, whatever happens, remember that you're going to get good training and you'll be OK in the end.

 

[Wendi22]

If I recall correctly, you had two attractive offers from reputable programs. Whatever you decide, whatever happens, remember that you're going to get good training and you'll be OK in the end.

Agree with this so much. I had a WAY worse situation than this and ended up having to go through the cycle again. Basically I picked a school that was really expensive and had to back out or go into massive debt. By the time I realized all this, it was WAY to late to go back and take the cheaper school. I understand the distressing feeling you are experiencing cause it was certainly hard. Things still worked out in the end and I am happy now.

My situation is different than yours but I can speak to what happened when I rejected the offer after originally accepting it. I called my advisor and apologized via phone. Given that it was due to financial reasons, the school was understanding and I maintained a good relationship with some individuals there. However, I do feel that if it had been for other reasons it may not have gone well. Maybe weigh the pros and cons of this carefully because I will not lie...it is a tricky situation. A little more information about the specific reasons for your regret may be helpful but I understand it is hard to share without revealing too much 🙂