Help with personal statement?

[sunshinerc]

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I have been struggling with writing my personal statement and I could really use some help with editing, what to add/remove/etc. It seems like everything I've tried to write sounds cliché or fake. I'm not sure how to translate my positive qualities into a coherent essay.

I have a (very) rough draft with a basic theme that includes my interest in medicine and some things that I've done and what I've learned from them. I feel like in trying to stick with a theme, I just repeated some of the same phrases over and over. I'm also not sure how to give my personal statement a strong conclusion.

Yes, I realize that I'm kind of late in the application process with getting help. I had issues with self-deprecation while working on this, thus prolonging the process.

Any tips, critiques, and editing would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

 

[mathnerd88]

You can send it to me. I'll try to give you feedback but I still got secondaries of my own to finish.

 

[femmegoblue]

You can also send it to me, I have had several people tell me mine is pretty strong and I'm great at editing!

 

[sunshinerc]

Thank you both! I'll send it in a personal message.

 

[hopefulERdoc251]

sure send it!

 

[AwayFromReality]

I had to do a lot of research to figure out how to create a well balanced theme throughout and how to remove cliches. It took a while but I think I was successful. Be happy to help you out.

 

[sunshinerc]

Thanks, again! I also did a lot of searching and asking about what to put in and kept getting contradicting information. My pre-med advisor would tell me one thing and the internet would say another.

 

[hopefulERdoc251]

You gotta do what's best for you. Some people went about talking through multiple experiences to become a doctor. I talked about one experience and how that epitomized my desire and motivation to help people...ect.