How to convey this without sounding desperate to POI?

[gradp]

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I got an interview to my top choice program, perfect research match, perfect program match, a GREAT program (especially for my research area, which is known to be one of, if not the, best). It is also in a wonderful location, and my fiance also just got accepted to that school for a different field.

Now this IS my top choice, and actually is my ONLY choice (I got 2 other interviews). My PI also knows the POI and has told me she's very pleasant to work with. Needless to say, I want sooooo badly to get in.

Should I convey this, and if so, how do I tell them how much I love their program without sounding hyper or desperate? If they accept me, I'd go in a heartbeat (funding issues aside). Can I just tell them straight out? How do schools or POIs take this? I don't want to seem fake or desperate, but I also want them to know how excited I am.

Thanks!

 

[psychologyrun]

First, know your stuff. Know what the POI has researched, know the overarching theories they use in their research. Connect your previous experiences to what they do, and have ideas of what you could research if you went to their lab. This is what you're mainly being assessed for.

In the informal parties/dinners, you can casually mention how much you would like to live in the city the program is in and you can mention that your fiance is coming there (if you're comfortable revealing your relationship status). I wouldn't say it too much or dwell on it, but you can get the information out there. Keep the focus on the program and how you can fit in and contribute.

 

[cara susanna]

Honestly, I think your enthusiasm will come across during interviews. There's no need to tell them you really, really want to attend--most of the people who are interviewing probably do as well. Definitely reiterate your interest after the interview though, when you email them a thank you.

 

[emily621]

I ran into this same "problem" last year. One program had been my top choice all three years I applied, and I FINALLY got an interview. I thought that I would love it before I got there, and everything about the weekend only confirmed my assumptions. I did say this in so many words to my POI and to the students in his lab at various points through the weekend, but in a very calm and measured way. I just reiterated how much I was attracted to the program and the lab before I got there, and how everything I learned throughout the interview only made me like it more. I think I did even say that they were by far my first choice, but again, not in a OMG I LOVE THIS PLACE YOU GUYS ARE THE BEST kind of way.

But other people are right too, you don't have to say it every 10 seconds either - chances are, your enthusiasm will come across while you are there, as well.

 

[paramour]

I agree largely with the aforementioned responses. I wanted to give a few words of caution as well, however. Don't build this program up so highly that it can't possibly live up to your expectations. Additionally, keep in mind that some places that "seem" perfect on all fronts really aren't once you get there (either after you interview or after you officially start). This takes me back to the previous point (and whether or not you can live with those imperfections?).

I've had similar thoughts with two programs where I interviewed (i.e., they're absolutely perfect fits.) With one of those programs, I learned some discouraging information on interviewing and after the interview. To be honest, I probably would have still lived with it had I been accepted and not waitlisted. It was a great opportunity regardless. With the other program, however, I had some serious twinges and then some after my interview. It truly was no where close to perfect as I thought it and to such an extent that I questioned whether I wanted the acceptance. In the meantime, a program that was no where near "perfect" on paper turned out to be absolutely fantastic in a number of unexpected ways.

Certainly let your enthusiasm show for the program during your interviews, but be open-minded and flexible that it may or may not be the most "perfect" match for you once you've completed your interview tour.

 

[weeblewobble]

I agree largely with the aforementioned responses. I wanted to give a few words of caution as well, however. Don't build this program up so highly that it can't possibly live up to your expectations. Additionally, keep in mind that some places that "seem" perfect on all fronts really aren't once you get there (either after you interview or after you officially start). This takes me back to the previous point (and whether or not you can live with those imperfections?).

I've had similar thoughts with two programs where I interviewed (i.e., they're absolutely perfect fits.) With one of those programs, I learned some discouraging information on interviewing and after the interview. To be honest, I probably would have still lived with it had I been accepted and not waitlisted. It was a great opportunity regardless. With the other program, however, I had some serious twinges and then some after my interview. It truly was no where close to perfect as I thought it and to such an extent that I questioned whether I wanted the acceptance. In the meantime, a program that was no where near "perfect" on paper turned out to be absolutely fantastic in a number of unexpected ways.

Certainly let your enthusiasm show for the program during your interviews, but be open-minded and flexible that it may or may not be the most "perfect" match for you once you've completed your interview tour.

I agree. I interviewed at a "top choice" of mine and was very attached to the idea of going, despite seeing some red flags at my interview. My preconceived notions about that school made it difficult to be open-minded about it afterwards, and even worse, it made it difficult to be open-minded about the others schools I interviewed at. I eventually took a couple of weeks to think things over and realized how much better a fit the program I am at now was and continues to be. So, as pragma noted, be cautious and open-minded- the way a school seems on paper may not be the same in person, for better, worse, or otherwise.

In any case, you'll come across enthusiastic and that'll do the talking for you. There's a delicate balance in between being enthusiastic and coming across "unprofessional" or "immature", unfortunately. It has seemed to me that professors want students to prefer their program (so that it is a safe bet that if they offer a place that the student will accept and not hold the spot while waiting for another school) but they don't want students to be too emotional about that preference (which can come across like the student "isn't ready" or some similar probably erroneous interpretation).

So with all that in mind, be enthusiastic and try to slip in comments or questions that show your enthusiasm without being direct (e.g., housing options; aspects of student life; minutiae of research/clinical duties). Maybe be more enthusiastic and direct with grad students, who can communicate things to your POI with a good spin.

 

[PsychedTriGirl]

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[gradp]

This is going to sound completely naive, but I guess I wonder how "well" would you recommend knowing a POI's research area? I have two interviews and have read like ten articles for each prof I am interviewing with...but it still doesn't seem like enough. How much is not enough or too much?

I was actually wondering this as well.

 

[cara susanna]

10 articles per POI sounds super extreme to me. I only read like two or three. Also, keep in mind that publications are usually years behind the professor's actual research, so he/she could have switched entire areas by now.

 

[PsychedTriGirl]

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[Doctor Eliza]

10 articles per POI sounds super extreme to me. I only read like two or three. Also, keep in mind that publications are usually years behind the professor's actual research, so he/she could have switched entire areas by now.

Agreed. They don't quiz you on what they have already written. You need some knowledge and need to be able to articulate specific aspects of their theories that relate to your own interests. You need to be able to answer how your unique ideas and interests will add to their work.

Good luck,
Dr. E

 

[ResearchGirlie]

Agreed. They don't quiz you on what they have already written. You need some knowledge and need to be able to articulate specific aspects of their theories that relate to your own interests. You need to be able to answer how your unique ideas and interests will add to their work.

Good luck,
Dr. E

Definitely agree. Read the papers more with an eye to how your interests fit and add to the topic rather than remembering specific details of their papers. If a person starts quizzing you about their prior articles then you don't want to work with them.

 

[dumbledoresgirl]

10 articles per POI sounds super extreme to me. I only read like two or three. Also, keep in mind that publications are usually years behind the professor's actual research, so he/she could have switched entire areas by now.

This. I interviewed with a professor who listed her research interests as "binge eating"...so I get to the interview with super awesome study ideas related to binge eating, only to find out all of her studies are now about sexual health. Needless to say, I wasn't prepared to talk about anything remotely related to sexual health Either way, there's only so much you can do to prepare, and you can really only go off of most recent publications / the POIs webpage if they have one. I agree, though, that 10 articles is way more than you need to read, and 2-3 articles are most likely sufficient (I would definitely not read more than 5!)

 

[PsychedTriGirl]

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[dumbledoresgirl]

Hmm I'm not sure if I would e-mail the POI at this point...I definitely did that when I was e-mailing them to see if they were taking students (asked for an article they had recently published / one that was representative of their future research direction) but I don't think I did that once interviews went out. Not saying that it would look bad by any means, I'm just not sure if that's something that is ok to do (maybe other people would have more insight into this). It's also quite possible that they just haven't published anything since 2010--they might have a bunch of papers under review that are just not listed on their website. But, if you want to double check, an alternative would be to e-mail one of their graduate students--you could ask if the publications listed on the professor's webpage are representative of the current research done in the lab, and that way you'll know for sure if the ones you found from 2010 are sufficient. Also, keep in mind that the experience I described with that POI who changed research areas and didn't bother to update her web page was likely uncommon, and I don't think you need to worry about that too much 🙂

Good luck with your interview!!

 

[Doctor Eliza]

Wow such good advice from everyone. I guess the last question I have is if a prof's page is out of date (which I find they often are) would it be inappropriate to email them to ask about any recent articles they submitted or that are in press? I have done a fair amount of online searches for one POI in particular and can't find anything after 2010. Would hate to have outdated info in an interview...
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I wouldn't do that. If they haven't been successful publishing since 2010 you risk putting them on the defensive before you even meet them. Read what you can and ask questions about works in progress when you meet.

Good luck,
Dr. E