I'm MS1 at a US MD. I've been on the border of bottom quartile/3rd quartile all year long and have no motivation to study more than 2-3 hours per day anymore. I was a great student in college but the amount of work here has messed me up. After doing poorly on the first few tests in which I put in a good amount of effort (no fails though) I lost motivation. When I do study, I'm watching TV on the side so it's very ineffective. I think I'm depressed and have been feeling borderline suicidal, I have no social life, I've put on weight from drinking and eating comfort food and lack of exercise (I have a fast metabolism so I'm talking like 4 beers/day and a ton of fries and pizza), my hair is falling out, and my extremely successful parents are sick of my complaining. Besides paying my bills they don't care about me. They are pressuring me to complete med school and become a doctor otherwise it will make them look bad, they will write me out of their will, and I'll be left with nothing. I have seen a psychiatrist who recommended medication but wasn't much help otherwise. What do I do?
How to keep pushing on?
- Thread starter unsur3
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Get to your school's counseling center STAT!!!
Also, you're an adult now. You're able to vote, drink, drive, smoke, work, pay taxes, run for public office, and fight and die for your country. Therefore, you're old enough to grow a spine and tell your parents that this is your life, and not theirs.
If you went into Medicine because your parents pushed you into doing something that you didn't want to do, then it might be time to bail. Getting an inheritance is not worth being miserable. If you get a job, you won't be left with nothing.
Also, you're an adult now. You're able to vote, drink, drive, smoke, work, pay taxes, run for public office, and fight and die for your country. Therefore, you're old enough to grow a spine and tell your parents that this is your life, and not theirs.
If you went into Medicine because your parents pushed you into doing something that you didn't want to do, then it might be time to bail. Getting an inheritance is not worth being miserable. If you get a job, you won't be left with nothing.
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^Unfortunately, we get scores on our board exams unlike in dental, so getting the lowest scores in class can translate (not always of course) to a lower board score, which matters for getting a residency.
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You need to go and seek out other avenues of help man. Try the counseling center, try a new psychiatrist or try the meds the old one offered. Also remember that you shouldn't be embarrassed to be low in the class it happens to people in every school and damn near everyone ends up in the top 2% of earnings in america. Another piece of advice would be get off SDN, most of the people here are either elite in their class or want you to believe they are elite. You need to focus on yourself and I would think seeing the stuff people put on here would make things worse.
Hundreds of medical schools students have been in your situation but they still make it. Just keep pushing. Getting a job in the real world is much more depressing and less rewarding than medicine. The first 2 years are tough but it gets better,
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OP, it sounds like you're making so many excuses for yourself or making yourself seem vulnerable or miserable.
If you want to recover, you have to do some soul searching. You have to find out what your motivation to become a doctor. Fame? Reputation?
Going to a counseling center will help sort out your innermost feelings, however, the most important thing is your own willpower. Your willpower is what keeps you going.
You want to become a doctor because it's your passion, not for any other reasons.
It doesn't matter if you were a great student in college. When you become a medical student, you're competing with people at your level or better. Your lack of motivation can be due to the fact that you're not scoring as well as you wanted despite the number of hours you put in.
Even so, you can push through it by your will power. Simply take things one step at a time. In class, stay focus. Outside of class, set a time to study in blocks. Rest in between if you need it. if you feel tired, go for a 1 hr workout. Don't make any excuses for yourself.
If you can't take care of own self mentally and physically, how do you expect to help patients?
Sent from my SM-N920V using SDN mobile
If you want to recover, you have to do some soul searching. You have to find out what your motivation to become a doctor. Fame? Reputation?
Going to a counseling center will help sort out your innermost feelings, however, the most important thing is your own willpower. Your willpower is what keeps you going.
You want to become a doctor because it's your passion, not for any other reasons.
It doesn't matter if you were a great student in college. When you become a medical student, you're competing with people at your level or better. Your lack of motivation can be due to the fact that you're not scoring as well as you wanted despite the number of hours you put in.
Even so, you can push through it by your will power. Simply take things one step at a time. In class, stay focus. Outside of class, set a time to study in blocks. Rest in between if you need it. if you feel tired, go for a 1 hr workout. Don't make any excuses for yourself.
If you can't take care of own self mentally and physically, how do you expect to help patients?
Sent from my SM-N920V using SDN mobile
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If you're only doing it because of your parents, I would seriously rethink medicine. It's a really long road and you have to work really hard. If you don't like it at all, it's gonna be miserable. I know because I was in your shoes. Don't listen to people who just tell you to push on, because they don't understand what it's like for You. This is a career that consumes your life for many years. You gotta think if it's right for you. Also don't listen to the poster above who said every other real world job is depressing. That's ridiculous. Being a doctor isn't the only great job out there, and even half of doctors say they're not satisfied with their job and wouldn't choose medicine again. My suggestion would be to see a counselor and sort out what's going on. Don't be afraid of your parents though. It's gonna be you who has to do this job for the rest of your life, not your parents. You won't be left with nothing if they cut you out of your will, you can get a job and make your own money. Besides, I'm willing to bet that's an empty threat anyway. And if you want to quit, now's really the best time to do it, before you've spent any more time or money.
I basically see myself at MS1 in your post, and if I could go back and tell myself one thing it would be seriously consider quitting. It's too late for me now, but it's not too late for you.
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1. GO TO YOUR SCHOOL'S COUNSELING CENTER - now. Do not make any major decisions while you're stressed and upset. You sound like you are in a bit of a bad place right now and you need some unbiased, helpful counseling from a professional source. This is not shameful, or a sign of weakness. Med school is an incredibly stressful time, and especially if you are the type of person who sets high expectations for themselves, can be emotionally devastating when you aren't achieving at the level you are used to.
2. Know that you can still be a good doctor as a 4th quartile student during M1/M2. Hell, I floated between the 3rd and 4th quartile and failed head/neck anatomy and I'm a pediatric craniofacial surgeon now!
3. Stress eating/drinking and weight gain are my stress responses too, and I get how bad that can make you feel. Working with your counselor you can identify some behavioral changes you can make that help you regain some feeling of control over your life and get your head back in the game
4. Hang in there! Med school is the worst... I still have vivid memories of studying all night long and crying because I was barely passing and I had NO idea what else to do. I cruised through undergrad as one of the top students in ever class and in med school, literally, I was putting in 100% effort and I was nowhere close to even the class average.
All responses were good but this one really helped.. thanks I really appreciate it. I'll get in touch with counseling soon. I know if I drop out I'll feel worse, not because of my parents' expectations but because I'll feel a sense of failure. Thanks again.
