M1 struggling

[Lifeblood_20]

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I started M1 two months ago and had a good start. However, this past three weeks I have been feeling like I am slipping into a bout of depression/anxiety. I am having trouble focusing during lectures/self-study, and after having 8 hours of classes every day I have been feeling too exhausted at night to do any meaningful studying. I have trouble falling asleep so I get more exhausted day by day. I have stopped exercising. I don't have the social energy to talk with any classmates. I feel so guilty because the material and activities are really, really interesting, but I am just not able to engage. Earlier this week I had a moment of panic as I gauged how much material I feel behind on, and after that, whenever I try to study, I feel either so rushed to catch up or so unmotivated because what's the point of studying this little bit if I am behind on so much.

I have struggled with mental health issues in college and know I didn't properly address them. I will try to work on it. But I just wanted to organize my thoughts here and listen to what advice you might have. Thank you.

 

[Osminog]

Sorry you're feeling this way. Schedule an appointment with a mental health counselor at your school. Also consider seeing a psychiatrist for potential pharmacological intervention. Med school will get quite a bit more challenging and stressful, so it's important to nip this problem in the bud while you're still in M1.

 

[Kardio]

8 hours of classes every day I have been feeling too exhausted at night to do any meaningful studying

8 hours!?

 

[acstylin]

Force the exercise!!! I can’t stress this enough and I’m not the type of person that loves exercise. Even if you feel like there is no way you can do it, you’ll be shocked at how much more effective your studies are. You’ll sleep better and feel better about yourself. Make that change right now then see how you feel in a week. It won’t fix all your problems but it will fix more than you think.

 

[Goro]

Sorry you're feeling this way. Schedule an appointment with a mental health counselor at your school. Also consider seeing a psychiatrist for potential pharmacological intervention. Med school will get quite a bit more challenging and stressful, so it's important to nip this problem in the bud while you're still in M1.

This!!!

Medical school is a furnace, and I've seen it break even healthy students. The #1 reason my school loses students to withdrawal, dismissal or LOA is to unresolved mental health issues.

 

[frosted2]

Sorry you are feeling this way. Please reach out if you ever need to vent or chat. I second the exercise. Even on days I don't even want to get out of bed, I at least try to swim a few laps. I always feel better afterwards.

FWIW, I do think it is normal to feel somewhat "behind" in med school. For that, I find it helpful to make a list of everything I have to do and use "scratching things off" as motivation and to show myself that I can do it.

EDIT: journaling helps tremendously... whenever I feel like I literally can't even look at another slide, listen to the 10 millionth lecture, etc. I write those feelings down in a very brutally honest manner (cause who else is going to read it?) and write until I've gotten my feelings out. When I go back and read it later, it feels good to know that I was in such a s****y place and was still able to get myself through it.

You've got this!!!

 

[Osteosaur]

Medical school can feel incredibly isolating because everyone around you seems incredibly perky and put-together while they struggle with the same anxieties you do. Definitely seek out a counselor, but just be aware you're not alone and not somehow an outlier who doesn't deserve to sit in class.

COVID has probably made it hard to socialize in a way that isn't superficial. But look to the class ahead of you for third party resources or anything to make studying more efficient. Lots of people have gone through this bull**** before you and they found ways to make it easier. Don't reinvent the wheel or sit there like its undergrad and diligently writing notes will help.

Are lectures mandatory? I was miserable the first three months of medical school as well. Sitting in lectures, all that "first pass, second pass, look again at the two week mark!" nonsense the people with Master's in Education threw my way did nothing. I discovered Anki half way through and never looked back. It boosted my efficiency and lowered my stress level tremendously. This is me speaking as an 'average' student.

 

[Lifeblood_20]

Thank you everyone for the advice and kind words. I have been doing better this past week. I am making myself get outside every day for some exercise. I enrolled in therapy at my school's counseling service so hope that helps.

I will keep this thread updated if I encounter any bumps along the road, as mental health is an often neglected/taboo topic in medicine and I hope to raise more awareness.

 

[deleted1100659]

your career isnt worth your life, I would wager half your class or more is on some sort of mental health medication, so those that may find fault with you about it are simply projecting their own insecurity.

My first semester in medical school was by far my hardest and I almost had to drop out; once I learned to take care of myself better I excelled. I started in the bottom 5 and finished in the top half not because I became smarter, but I just learned how to keep myself happy while I did miserable things.

For me what helped was I avoided as much class as possible as would watch lectures at 1.5x or 2x speed and specifically just look for concepts I didnt understand or valuable parts of the lecture

 

[Lifeblood_20]

It's been 6 months since I started this thread, thought I would give an update. I am finishing up my M1 year and doing very well. For anyone who comes across this -- seeking mental health help is so important and I am grateful for the advice/support I got on here and irl.