Personal Statement length?

[ciestar]

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Now I understand that the character limit is 5300.
However, with every draft I've written, I am up right under that number.

Is it true that less is more?

I am really frustrated. I utilized some of the help on here with my PS and Im still very confused. I feel like my PS is weak and it seems like I'm rambling, but I cannot find anything to cut out.

I just need some general advice.

 

[bearded frog]

​

 

[ciestar]

“Brevity is the soul of wit.”
― William Shakespeare, Hamlet

“I have only made this letter longer because I have not had the time to make it shorter."
― Blaise Pascal, The Provincial Letters

“The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending; and to have the two as close together as possible.”
― George Burns

“Writing is 1 percent inspiration, and 99 percent elimination.”
― Louise Brooks

So, basically, yes, less is more.
Thanks for those quotes, haha.

This is the problem I'm having. Apparently I'm not concise at all.

 

[bearded frog]

​

 

[mrh125]

it's exactly 5,300 including spaces. If you're under that number that's good, but dont focus on the number. Free-write and you can always eliminate extra adjectives. Writing a personal statement can be one of the most frustrating and overwhelming things ever (speaking from experience) and i'm on draft #45 or #50 by now. Start your personal statement with an example that tells a story and then link everything together with a few other meaningful experiences and write a conclusion. Demonstrate through the stories how these experiences shaped you. Focus on the meaning of the personal statement first of all and some structural elements (transitions) and once you get that I'd recommend hiring a writing tutor to help with grammar (this whole process is nitpicky as hell and the last thing you want is some adcom throwing a tantrum and rejecting you because the grammar isn't flawless) and make things flow better.

Reading some of other people's personal statements and don't be surprised at how exaggerated a lot of them seem. It's up to you if you want to do things that way. If you get to the point where half the people hate your PS and half the people like it just submit it and don't agonize over it anymore. If you writing style rambles (join the club 🙂 ) and isnt necessarily the strongest now's the time to accept it and there's no shame in working with a writing tutor.

Also practice writing clearly and concisely. take sentences and cut out anything redundant or any long lists of adjectives. If you don't have that skill at first (I didn't either this is the weirdest writing assignment ever) you'll get it. You can always shorten things later though. It's harder to make it longer than shorten.

Also, the more you stress the harder it gets. Don't be afraid to give it a break some days. There were some days where I just couldn't work on it and I accepted that.

 

[ciestar]

If someone has to read however many thousands of personal statements of applicants, nothing will make them more happier and think more positively of you, than if you are clear, direct, and concise.

Just don't use quotes in your actual statement... 😉

No quotes at all 😉
I think I might be over elaborating or using too many examples. Ugh, i think the issue is there's a lot I think that would fit but idk what should be removed.

 

[ciestar]

it's exactly 5,300 including spaces. If you're under that number that's good, but dont focus on the number. Free-write and you can always eliminate extra adjectives. Writing a personal statement can be one of the most frustrating and overwhelming things ever (speaking from experience) and i'm on draft #45 or #50 by now. Start your personal statement with an example that tells a story and then link everything together with a few other meaningful experiences and write a conclusion. Demonstrate through the stories how these experiences shaped you. Focus on the meaning of the personal statement first of all and some structural elements (transitions) and once you get that I'd recommend hiring a writing tutor to help with grammar (this whole process is nitpicky as hell and the last thing you want is some adcom throwing a tantrum and rejecting you because the grammar isn't flawless) and make things flow better.

Reading some of other people's personal statements and don't be surprised at how exaggerated a lot of them seem. It's up to you if you want to do things that way. If you get to the point where half the people hate your PS and half the people like it just submit it and don't agonize over it anymore. If you writing style rambles (join the club 🙂 ) and isnt necessarily the strongest now's the time to accept it and there's no shame in working with a writing tutor.

Also practice writing clearly and concisely. take sentences and cut out anything redundant or any long lists of adjectives. If you don't have that skill at first (I didn't either this is the weirdest writing assignment ever) you'll get it. You can always shorten things later though. It's harder to make it longer than shorten.

Also, the more you stress the harder it gets. Don't be afraid to give it a break some days. There were some days where I just couldn't work on it and I accepted that.

Thanks for all the tips! Thankfully grammar has never been a huge issue of mine. I'm a very colorful writer and that's where this is coming back to bite me! I'm very descriptive but I guess there's no place for that here.

 

[mrh125]

Thanks for all the tips! Thankfully grammar has never been a huge issue of mine. I'm a very colorful writer and that's where this is coming back to bite me! I'm very descriptive but I guess there's no place for that here.

Yea, if you're very descriptive you get called out for "telling" and not showing. Use your colorful writing to paint a picture of what happened to you and led you to medicine.

 

[ciestar]

Haha my descriptions are my feeble attempts to show and not tell. I might just be overdoing it.

 

[mrh125]

Haha my descriptions are my feeble attempts to show and not tell. I might just be overdoing it.

Do what you can and don't be afraid to try different things. It takes time to find the right style and what works.

 

[ciestar]

Do what you can and don't be afraid to try different things. It takes time to find the right style and what works.

Thanks 🙂
I do appreciate the encouragement

 

[mrh125]

Thanks 🙂
I do appreciate the encouragement

no problem, we all could use some encouragement 🙂 because this whole process is pretty hellish and demotivating in general.

 

[darkjedi]

I've read several dozen applicant PS's and the ones that I tend to like the most are those who are able to exude 'passion' in their writing. It comes through loud and clear what their motivations for pursuing medicine are. The oft-repeated phrase "show don't tell" is 100% correct. There's no real need to be highly descriptive, as it's more important to weave a story that is coherent and bound together through whatever passions you have pursued in life.

 

[MedWonk]

Now I understand that the character limit is 5300.
However, with every draft I've written, I am up right under that number.

Is it true that less is more?

I am really frustrated. I utilized some of the help on here with my PS and Im still very confused. I feel like my PS is weak and it seems like I'm rambling, but I cannot find anything to cut out.

I just need some general advice.

Short as you can get your point across and not sacrifice quality. Mine was 5300 exactly. I felt like I needed it to adequately express what I wanted, but I do think if I felt I could make it shorter I would've and would certainly recommend it.

 

[Plecopotamus]

Yea, if you're very descriptive you get called out for "telling" and not showing. Use your colorful writing to paint a picture of what happened to you and led you to medicine.

descriptors were not the reason you were told you were telling instead of showing.

 

[gyngyn]

I've read several dozen applicant PS's and the ones that I tend to like the most are those who are able to exude 'passion' in their writing. It comes through loud and clear what their motivations for pursuing medicine are. The oft-repeated phrase "show don't tell" is 100% correct. There's no real need to be highly descriptive, as it's more important to weave a story that is coherent and bound together through whatever passions you have pursued in life.

For example: enthusiasm in the PS: excellent. Actually using the word "passion,": best avoided.

 

[mrh125]

descriptors were not the reason you were told you were telling instead of showing.

who said I was referring to myself and what you've seen from me alone (i've drastically reworked whatever you saw)? I'm just posting a trend i've observed. If you list too many adjectives that becomes filler and more telling than showing is the point.

 

[ciestar]

For example: enthusiasm in the PS: excellent. Actually using the word "passion,": best avoided.

Well i guess it's great i didn't include the word passion one time

 

[gyngyn]

Well i guess it's great i didn't include the word passion one time

atta boy! Try to avoid "love" too...

 

[ciestar]

atta boy! Try to avoid "love" too...

No love either! I'm just wondering, is around 4200 characters too long? I rewrote the whole thing beginning to end and think this one is much better than before.

 

[Plecopotamus]

who said I was referring to myself and what you've seen from me alone (i've drastically reworked whatever you saw)? I'm just posting a trend i've observed. If you list too many adjectives that becomes filler and more telling than showing is the point.

I didn't need to read your drastically re-worked PS to make my comment. It could have been about the general "you" rather than you specifically and still been true -- excessive description is not what is meant by "telling" or "showing" -- both can be done in an excessively wordy fashion in which there is too much "filler" language, and both are defined techniques (or at times failure thereof) in writing. In fact, showing generally has the more wordy structure, but the words are much higher impact/value for the reader.

Telling: cataloging information, actions, emotions // dry
Showing: developing a full image in your reader's imagination // evocative

If either you are misinterpreting what they mean OR your private PS readers are misusing the terms show/tell because they are having trouble explaining themselves, you could be missing out on further opportunity to improve your PS.

From www.wright.edu/~david.wilson/eng3830/creativewriting101.pdf:
Here’s a very basic tell sentence: Bob felt scared.

It’s unambiguous, but not at all evocative — Bob may feel fear, but the reader isn’t likely to.

Consider this alternative: Bob’s face went ashen. His breathing came in ragged gasps.

True, the second example is a good deal longer than the first — ten words as compared to a bare three — but you get a lot more bang for your narrative buck. Like the first, the second example makes it pretty clear that Bob is scared, but unlike the first, it creates a distinct picture in the reader’s mind.

 

[LizzyM]

From www.wright.edu/~david.wilson/eng3830/creativewriting101.pdf:
Here’s a very basic tell sentence: Bob felt scared.

It’s unambiguous, but not at all evocative — Bob may feel fear, but the reader isn’t likely to.

Consider this alternative: Bob’s face went ashen. His breathing came in ragged gasps.

True, the second example is a good deal longer than the first — ten words as compared to a bare three — but you get a lot more bang for your narrative buck. Like the first, the second example makes it pretty clear that Bob is scared, but unlike the first, it creates a distinct picture in the reader’s mind.

I don't know.... I like the first one. With the second, I'm wondering if he's scared or having a heart attack... in which case he might be scared, too.... 😉


I am a fan of a 5 paragraph essay that follows a theme with three examples, each of which builds on the theme, with an opening paragraph that introduces the theme and a closing paragraph that sums it up and makes a final summary statement.

 

[Plecopotamus]

I don't know.... I like the first one. With the second, I'm wondering if he's scared or having a heart attack... in which case he might be scared, too.... 😉


I am a fan of a 5 paragraph essay that follows a theme with three examples, each of which builds on the theme, with an opening paragraph that introduces the theme and a closing paragraph that sums it up and makes a final summary statement.

I agree and also thought it left it interpretation for whether he was scared or . . . sick. But I'm just providing an example for mrh125, because he is conflating telling with wordiness, which may be a problem if the people reviewing his PS are saying he's telling not showing as part of their feedback.

Unfortunately, because most of the examples are for people doing creative writing, they are lengthy and use too many descriptors for us, and I figured I'd get feedback that it's unreasonable to lengthen the content so much when you have such space constraints. It's hard to illustrate with short examples out of context. One of the most common problems I see with PS's that are sent to me is applicants' compulsion to try to list all of their accomplishments with little evidence of who they are or how they feel about any of them. Nobody wants to read an unabridged CV.

 

[LizzyM]

I agree and also thought it left it interpretation for whether he was scared or . . . sick. But I'm just providing an example for mrh125, because he is conflating telling with wordiness, which may be a problem if the people reviewing his PS are saying he's telling not showing as part of their feedback.

Unfortunately, because most of the examples are for people doing creative writing, they are lengthy and use too many descriptors for us, and I figured I'd get feedback that it's unreasonable to lengthen the content so much when you have such space constraints. It's hard to illustrate with short examples out of context. One of the most common problems I see with PS's that are sent to me is applicants' compulsion to try to list all of their accomplishments with little evidence of who they are or how they feel about any of them. Nobody wants to read an unabridged CV.

Telling: "I have been fascinated by scientific research but I feel most useful when I am with patients. I think that a career that combines both would be most fulfilling for me and is what I plan to focus on in the future."

Showing: "My research with Dr. Tao on macrophage activity and my Sunday mornings with children in the pediatric ward made me realize that I want a career that combines both research and patient care."