personal statement panic

[Explosivo]

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Hey guys I feel like crap. I've been working on my PS for about a month now and this morning after looking at it for the umpteenth time I really hate it. I worked so hard on it thus far and I don't want to scrap it now. In general though I tend to hate most things I write so I'm wondering if any of you have similar experiences. I'm starting to panic b/c I really need to submit soon but I just can't seem to write a PS that I'll be happy with. This is really getting to me.

How did any of you overcome such feelings? My PS almost feels embarrasing and just sounds really dumb. Then again, I'm always my harshest critic but unfortunately I'm even scared of letting others read it b/c I think it's so awful. Maybe its b/c I read too many brilliant sample PSs that I'm trying to achieve that gold standard but I don't know. Are most PSs as good as the ones given out as samples? I wish I had never looked at any of those in the first place.

Any advice? 😕

 

[DrBlueDevil]

I bought a book of essays to help me write mine last year. ~90% of them were about how the author volunteered 2342529 hours/week in a hospital while curing at least 2 rare forms of cancer while tending to their sick parents/siblings while getting a 5.0 in school while working 8 jobs. I'd say don't worry if you don't have all these experiences to talk about...most people I know who got in didn't (and I didn't either). For that reason, I never felt like my essay was nearly as good or interesting as the ones I read in books, but I don't really think it matters.

 

[lola]

I personally never looked at any samples. I have the tendency to want to use other people's ideas when I read things before writing my own. As far as it sounding stupid, don't worry about that! Most personal statements sound a little silly -- especially to the person who wrote it. I, too, was a little embarrassed to show it to people, because I felt like I was exposing a part of me that I wasn't sure I wanted people close to me to know about. It's a bit weird, but I was more uneasy having people I know well read it than complete strangers. I say give it 5 or so people to read and see what they say. Suck up your embarrassment! They will probably be able to help you so that you feel a little more comfortable with it. I know my readers really helped on the sections I didn't like too much. Good luck!

 

[Bubbles]

Thanks for writing the post I have been wanting to write for the past month. At least there are two of us in the same boat!!!! I have the closest thing to a personal statement I have had in 6 months by just sitting down and not letting myself get up until I wrote one. I am not proud of my personal statement and I too feel insecure about sending it in. So many ideas, yet impossible to put it together on paper!!! I am just going with what I have and sending it in soon, my app has been waiting for the essay part for a month now. Good luck, I hear ya!

 

[Mutterkuchen]

There are many of us in the same boat. I think that Lola's advice is best, suck it up and find people to read it and offer critiques. If they think that it sucks, then so what. Do you want to go to medical school?

That said, I certainly understand. It is a "personal" statement.

 

[Tweetie_bird]

oh god,
you have no idea how much I am beginning to hate my PS. I keep going to others and have them read it, to pick out all the wrong things with it.

To me, mine seems entirely wrong. I have been working on it for the last 6 months and had 21 drafts. Yet, I am at a loss for words to describe how much I don't like it. Luckily, others have said it's "so-so" so I am just going off on what they are saying. My advice is, talk to as many people as possible.
Tweetie

 

[meatloaf king]

Writing is a hobby of mine, and as such I devote a lot of time to it. This, however, was torture. (too many revisions/re-writes to count) The personal statement is tough because you are exposing yourself. One thing that helped me is that I made a small list of things I wanted my essay to accomplish (2-3). (for me it was - not read as a resumee, exibit and establish qualities, and flow well) and a few core qualities (3-4, caring, dedicated, etc.) that I wanted to have the reader to carry away from the essay. After writing something that fit these requirements I handed it out to people in the English Dept. that didn't know me - and got their oppinions/corrections. Also asked them how they felt about me as a person after reading the essay the first time, because thats how the adcoms will see me. Above all - just be honest and true to yourself. Try to pile it too high and it'll sound sanctimonious.

 

[meatloaf king]

Post Script to above message:
I'll gladly review a few essays - I've got a little time now that I'm in summer classes. Just PM me and I'll give you my e-mail address.

 

[Explosivo]

Thanks for the responses guys. I feel better now. In any case I just lopped off my entire introductory paragraph which was bothering me more than anything else. I'll have to rewrite that first. Its funny though how the introduction is probably the toughest thing to write.

I'm not going to bed tonight until I hammer this darn thing out so it looks like I'm in for a long night. I used to bang out 5-6 page papers in a single night in college. Now I'm just paralyzed trying to write this 5300 character essay.