Personal statement strategy...too pathetic?

[P.M.]

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I have the body of my personal statement all done I just need the intro and conclusion. I'm thinking of writing about how my parents and I immigrated to the U.S. from India and how they had to start from scratch. They were doctors but could not get residency and they even had to deliver pizza for a little and we were on food stamps/welfare. Because I had to help them a lot and take care of my siblings while my parents went to school I had to mature at a young age. Now I feel like I can face any challenge and can understand hardships my future patients may be facing. I don't want to sound like adcoms owe me admission or like my parents pressured me to become a doctor. Do you think this strategy is too personal or pathetic?

 

[Optimus-Prime]

Just be honest, hardship is far from pathetic

 

[TheBigB]

You can write a pathetic essay regardless of the subject. Keep in mind, this is an essay about you, not your parents. Mention the difficulties, but focus on what you've learned from them and what you've accomplished despite having them. As far as picking another subject, this is your story. It's obviously shaped you, and it can be a great medium to communicate your developed empathy and such.

 

[Lamel]

I don't see how that's bad, as long as you focus on yourself, and don't focus too much on your parents' hardships.

Whether or not you seem like you're being pushed into medicine will likely be decided at the interview, and from your background I would expect that question. So be prepared the answer.

 

[nemo123]

As long as you don't make it sound like you're whining about your past or blaming your past for anything, you should be fine (and like others have said, make sure it focuses on you). If you want another set of eyes to look over your PS for you, you can send your PS to the readers on the PS list.

 

[zzxxzz]

I have the body of my personal statement all done I just need the intro and conclusion. I'm thinking of writing about how my parents and I immigrated to the U.S. from India and how they had to start from scratch. They were doctors but could not get residency and they even had to deliver pizza for a little and we were on food stamps/welfare. Because I had to help them a lot and take care of my siblings while my parents went to school I had to mature at a young age. Now I feel like I can face any challenge and can understand hardships my future patients may be facing. I don't want to sound like adcoms owe me admission or like my parents pressured me to become a doctor. Do you think this strategy is too personal or pathetic?

As I'm sure you know, this was the experience of many, many Indian medical school applicants, except many didn't have the benefit of having physicians as parents.

Be very careful how you write this. I'd think of something else, personally.

 

[P.M.]

Thanks for the replies! This is what I have to work with and I just have to get it done. After all, I doubt anyone can come up with something adcoms have never heard before.

 

[singads]

Make sure you explain what you learned from all the hardships. Just don't write the hardships. And as someone said, make it about you. The more you write about others, the less they know about you.