Perverts

Panacea Financial Contract Review
This forum made possible through the generous support of SDN members, donors, and sponsors. Thank you.
L

leaverus

New Member
Verified Member
15+ Year Member
Joined
Jan 23, 2004
Messages
672
Reaction score
274
Members don't see this ad.
Just finished a MAC for a 44yr old dude with a 10"-long (i know the length because the patient measured the object prior to insertion) squash lodged in his rectum transversely between the sacrum and pubic symphysis 😱; took the GI guy 45 mins of struggling before it came out. He tried grabbing it with various instruments, finally made a hole in the middle, stuck his finger through and slowly wiggled it out. Also saw a shaving cream can when i was a resident. Just curious what other "WTF were you thinking?" objects you guys have seen.
 
leaverus said:
Just finished a MAC for a 44yr old dude with a 10"-long (i know the length because the patient measured the object prior to insertion) squash lodged in his rectum transversely between the sacrum and pubic symphysis 😱; took the GI guy 45 mins of struggling before it came out. He tried grabbing it with various instruments, finally made a hole in the middle, stuck his finger through and slowly wiggled it out. Also saw a shaving cream can when i was a resident. Just curious what other "WTF were you thinking?" objects you guys have seen.
Click to expand...

Had the similar case couple of weeks ago - an 84 (sic!!!) y.o. guy managed to insert a foot-long sponge-like cylinder about 10 cm in diameter( I have no idea what could it be, except... sponge). GI doc struggled 45 min and finally gave up - a surgeon fished it out in 30 seconds...
 
An intact light bulb.


leaverus said:
Just finished a MAC for a 44yr old dude with a 10"-long (i know the length because the patient measured the object prior to insertion) squash lodged in his rectum transversely between the sacrum and pubic symphysis 😱; took the GI guy 45 mins of struggling before it came out. He tried grabbing it with various instruments, finally made a hole in the middle, stuck his finger through and slowly wiggled it out. Also saw a shaving cream can when i was a resident. Just curious what other "WTF were you thinking?" objects you guys have seen.
Click to expand...
 
I have seen a few- latex dildo (14"), glass votive candle holder, potato, coke can (initially we thought the posting was for Cocaine in the rectum), 2 light bulbs and the winner has to be the unmistakable outline of a glass Vicks 44 bottle.
 
Maglite. Not the mini size, but the cop-crackin-your-skull-with-it kind. Delivered it like a baby in the OR (no epidural).
 
Fastrach said:
Maglite. Not the mini size, but the cop-crackin-your-skull-with-it kind. Delivered it like a baby in the OR (no epidural).
Click to expand...

PR or c-section like? (Similar case was written up in the throwaway journal Emergency Medical Services for a 3 part series in the 90s on genital/anal trauma - softball up the ass, femoral head extractor couldn't get out, to the OR, where, as was written, they "delivered a bouncing baby softball" after abdominal entry.)
 
leaverus said:
Just finished a MAC for a 44yr old dude with a 10"-long (i know the length because the patient measured the object prior to insertion) squash lodged in his rectum transversely between the sacrum and pubic symphysis 😱; took the GI guy 45 mins of struggling before it came out. He tried grabbing it with various instruments, finally made a hole in the middle, stuck his finger through and slowly wiggled it out. Also saw a shaving cream can when i was a resident. Just curious what other "WTF were you thinking?" objects you guys have seen.
Click to expand...

During my residency I moonlighted prolifically as an ER doc.

RIGHT GUARD deodarant with the ROLL ON BALL.

Had a dude come into my ER with the Right Guard Roll On Ball

bottle

completely

up his terd cutter.
 
.....and jammed a large toenail clipper up the old wagon wheel. Kid starts asking his pop, as he's drifting off during the conscience sedation, "Dad, do we have more toenail clippers at home?. "How big are they?" This took place in the ED, needless to say dad was at the bedside. The look on dads face was just awful.
 
8-inch cucumber. Transferred in to the trauma service. Somewhere along the line someone got a CT scan. Yes, you can see the seeds on CT just like when you slice it for a salad.
 
Last edited:
:laugh::laugh:I seriously don't get it. Is there some DSM IV classification/criteria for this type of thing? It seems too "common" for there not to have been studies on this weird a.ss (pun intended) behavior.

I'm not willing to accept that this "crap" could be considered an extreme end of the spectrum of "normal" human "sexuality".... (somehow I feel I'm not alone in this belief either)
 
Had a middle-aged gent for a T9-10 transthoracic laminectomy, which was subsequently aborted after a foley catheter was unable to be placed and the urologist discovered a foreign body in the guy's urethra. We ended up taking the pt to cysto, and found a 3" long metal cylinder lodged in the guy's urethra. Post-op, the pt stated, "I don't have a clue where that came from."
 
I love that response...and I needed that laugh...

🙂
 
Mr-Garrison-Mr-Slave--8961.jpg
 
Couple of years ago we had a patient come in with a similar profile as the OP. Had an orangina bottle (google image it) stuck the wide side up. Patient presented with "abdominal pain". Physically looked like the dude was prego. They had to remove it by surgery. Blown!

Had a few kids also come in with the "experimentation" excuse, except they were using mommy's toys 😱
 
Did not see this personally (though I wish I had), but when I was on ER we read a journal article about rectal foreign bodies and one of the cases was a guy that stuck one of those propane tanks you take on camping trips up there.... I wonder if he was trying to light his farts on fire and get to the moon or something.
 
veetz said:
Had a middle-aged gent for a T9-10 transthoracic laminectomy, which was subsequently aborted after a foley catheter was unable to be placed and the urologist discovered a foreign body in the guy's urethra. We ended up taking the pt to cysto, and found a 3" long metal cylinder lodged in the guy's urethra. Post-op, the pt stated, "I don't have a clue where that came from."
Click to expand...

an ex-gf's friend works at a urology clinic. apparently some JUDGE refused to take off his c.ock ring..... they urged him to do so, but it seems the ED was really playing with this dudes head (seriously no pun intended on that one).

Gern, apparently (allegedly?) the dude i mentioned had some outflow obstructions that were becoming seriously problematic as well. Don't know the ultimate outcome as this was a few years back and I never bothered to "follow up" on the issue........
 
Man, that orangina (how is that pronounced - rhymes with vagina??) is shaped exactly like our specimen:
gourd.jpg


At least my guy had the "good sense" not to use something that can shatter into hundreds of tiny sharp pieces.

Gern, the mental image of that old dude's chicken being literally choked makes me CRINGE :scared: Ouch!!
 
Apollyon said:
PR or c-section like? (Similar case was written up in the throwaway journal Emergency Medical Services for a 3 part series in the 90s on genital/anal trauma - softball up the ass, femoral head extractor couldn't get out, to the OR, where, as was written, they "delivered a bouncing baby softball" after abdominal entry.)
Click to expand...

Under GA put him in steep reverse-T, pushed down on his belly and pulled it out, no pfanny incision required.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top