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Dear all,
I am not a therapist, but need an answer to the following question on the code of professional ethics.
I wish to write to the therapist of someone I was at one time involved with to provide a piece of information that I am relatively confident the therapist does not have a clear picture of.
I need to know whether the therapist is obligated to disclose to her client that I was in touch. Conversely, is there any way I can myself make a request for confidentiality in this correspondence?
I do not harbor any ill will in doing so. Here is the situation:
I was not aware until well after a breakup that the person I was involved with was (with high probability) a narcissist. As you know, narcissism is close to the hardest disorder to treat, and a good part of that is due to the narcissist's unrelenting determination to conceal any perceived flaws they have.
My reason for wanting to share this assessment is not that I am still "hooked" emotionally; this is simply a very intelligent person with whom I once shared a deep friendship (beyond the ended romance), and I see no reason why these behaviors should continue to sabotage other people's overtures at friendship -- or ruin others' intimate relationships with the client in the future. I experienced about three months of verbal abuse after the breakup when trying to maintain a friendship. There are a number of other DSM-like behaviors that are a perfect match for narcissism. They include rejection of even-handed olive branches because of even a whiff of shared responsibility for tensions. Personally, I did not welcome discovering this match -- it is not a misdiagnosis. This turned my picture of this person on its head, and made me lose hope that friendship was going to be possible. Every observation has held up since: even a long spell afterwards, I am finding the same narcissistic disdain and resentment for me blocking any headway.
I am confident that the therapist does not have this piece of the picture. The opposite is the case. From all that I heard recounted while we were still together, it is clear now that this person is simply snowing the therapist, and probably using these sessions to shore up psychic defenses rather than examine them in a clear light.
If it is at the therapist's discretion to disclose correspondence, then how can I best make the case that this information is relevant to treatment, and should be kept confidential? It is a personality disorder, after all.
Thank you for your advice.
Sincerely,
PointTaken
I am not a therapist, but need an answer to the following question on the code of professional ethics.
I wish to write to the therapist of someone I was at one time involved with to provide a piece of information that I am relatively confident the therapist does not have a clear picture of.
I need to know whether the therapist is obligated to disclose to her client that I was in touch. Conversely, is there any way I can myself make a request for confidentiality in this correspondence?
I do not harbor any ill will in doing so. Here is the situation:
I was not aware until well after a breakup that the person I was involved with was (with high probability) a narcissist. As you know, narcissism is close to the hardest disorder to treat, and a good part of that is due to the narcissist's unrelenting determination to conceal any perceived flaws they have.
My reason for wanting to share this assessment is not that I am still "hooked" emotionally; this is simply a very intelligent person with whom I once shared a deep friendship (beyond the ended romance), and I see no reason why these behaviors should continue to sabotage other people's overtures at friendship -- or ruin others' intimate relationships with the client in the future. I experienced about three months of verbal abuse after the breakup when trying to maintain a friendship. There are a number of other DSM-like behaviors that are a perfect match for narcissism. They include rejection of even-handed olive branches because of even a whiff of shared responsibility for tensions. Personally, I did not welcome discovering this match -- it is not a misdiagnosis. This turned my picture of this person on its head, and made me lose hope that friendship was going to be possible. Every observation has held up since: even a long spell afterwards, I am finding the same narcissistic disdain and resentment for me blocking any headway.
I am confident that the therapist does not have this piece of the picture. The opposite is the case. From all that I heard recounted while we were still together, it is clear now that this person is simply snowing the therapist, and probably using these sessions to shore up psychic defenses rather than examine them in a clear light.
If it is at the therapist's discretion to disclose correspondence, then how can I best make the case that this information is relevant to treatment, and should be kept confidential? It is a personality disorder, after all.
Thank you for your advice.
Sincerely,
PointTaken
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