relationship, does it make it?

This forum made possible through the generous support of SDN members, donors, and sponsors. Thank you.
D

dreams

Full Member
10+ Year Member
15+ Year Member
Joined
Jun 24, 2007
Messages
297
Reaction score
1
Members do not see this ad.
just wondering if some of you med students could let me know if you had a relationship going into school, did it last? If so any secrets? If not anything you would have done differently?
 
dreams said:
just wondering if some of you med students could let me know if you had a relationship going into school, did it last? If so any secrets? If not anything you would have done differently?
Click to expand...

It certainly can last, but you have to make it a priority. It is very easy to let school consume your life because there is so much to do that you could conceivably spend every waking moment studying. You have to carve out time where you turn it off. It was hard for me first year, but you adjust and this year is much better. As for 3rd/4th year, I don't know.

Good luck.
 
The relationship lasting will end up depending on the other person. If your significant other is the needy type who wants you to spend all your free time with them, the relationship is doomed. If they are the type of person who is laid back, supportive, and understanding, then you will most likely make it. My hubby proposed to me mid-way through my first year of med school. We got married the summer before 2nd year. Every step of the way he's been supportive, rooting me on and cheering me up when I'm down on myself. I also have been great at warning him about rough times. Before third year started, I made sure he knew that I'd be around a lot less and stressed out more when I was around. He was very understanding and helpful in relieving my stress and anxiety. I don't know what I would have done without him. He made med school so much better for me. Now, I'm preparing him for the horrors or residency...
 
katrinadams9 said:
...We got married the summer before 2nd year. ... Now, I'm preparing him for the horrors or residency...
Click to expand...

My wife and I married the summer between her M1 and M2 year. We had kid #1 the summer before her M4 year. She did an IM residency. Kid #2 came her PGY3 year.

As a spouse, the first two years were pretty straight forward since her schedule was a lot like undergrad. By the second year she was talking almost completely in the language of medicine, which was a bit alienating. Third year was a big change, with a completely new schedule. It was pretty easy to adjust, though. Her intern year was the worst -- an incredible amount of inpatient/on-call time and we now had a son to watch after. I suppose it was the transitions that were the hardest. Once you get into the routine, it really doesn't seem so bad. Plus, you realize that you can put up with just about anything for four weeks.

The worst part was how many days would go by without seeing her. She'd be up before me, gone all night, arrive home post-call while I was at work, slept through until the next morning. I made it a habit to take the children by the hospital for a family dinner in the cafeteria when she was on call. Sometimes she's get paged and have to take off, but often it was enough that the kids remembered what she looked like (LOL).

I'm satisfied with how we handled it. I don't think I would have done anything differently.

Now it's my turn as the medical student. It will be interesting to see things from the other side of the coin.
 
dreams said:
just wondering if some of you med students could let me know if you had a relationship going into school, did it last? If so any secrets? If not anything you would have done differently?
Click to expand...

I second Goose on this one: you have to make it a priority. Also, I think it's important to talk with your SO about what your schedule will be like and set expectations long before the first day of class. I had multiple conversations with my boyfriend (who is not a student) before school started, and I think I actually scared him by emphasizing how I wouldn't have much time to spend with him. Turns out, it hasn't been bad at all. I find ways to work our relationship into my day -- I sometimes drop him off at work on my way to school, or we cook dinner together, or we'll work out together. Sometimes he'll come over and read a book on my couch while I study -- even though we're doing different things, it's nice just to be in the same room.

It's also important to understand that your boyfriend/girlfriend will likely have to compromise their time so that they can spend time with you. Try to be sensitive to that, and don't make them feel like their schedule is less important than yours just because yours is more demanding. If your SO is not a med student, I would also make an attempt to have friends and interests outside of school. There is a big world out there, and non-med students get irritated when all you can talk about is what you dissected in anatomy lab that day.

This has just been my experience as an M1... I'm sure it becomes tougher as one goes through M3/4 and residency.
 
As an M1, it hasn't really been a problem. I was married a year before school started, and we both had a good idea of what to expect. If anything, I think we were braced for the worst and we didn't get it.

I second the post about having people in your life from outside of med school. It's sooooo nice not to talk about school 24/7. Your classmates will be moret han happy to listen to you complain, and your SO's will be more than happy to hear about your successes, so it's a good balance.
 
I am planning to get married the summer after first year (i'm starting school in the fall). Any tips from those who did that on handling the planning, etc. on top of med school? I'm trying to start really early because I know it will be overwhelming, plus the school i'm likely going to has a short summer break.
 
rivilyndoc said:
I am planning to get married the summer after first year (i'm starting school in the fall). Any tips from those who did that on handling the planning, etc. on top of med school? I'm trying to start really early because I know it will be overwhelming, plus the school i'm likely going to has a short summer break.
Click to expand...

I did the same. She planned it all, thank god. You've just got accept the fact that many things will be a surprise on your wedding day. If you're a girl and want to be involved in everything regarding planning, I got nothing for you. Make quick decisions. 🙂

Good luck.
 
I also got married between 1st and 2nd year of med school. Wedding planning isn't really all that much work -- it's really what you make it. If you aren't too picky, you won't have to worry about it very much at all. But it can also go the other way -- if you are worried about everything being "just so," it will take up a lot of your time. Get the big things taken care of early - reception site, ceremony site, officiant, food, and from there it shouldn't really be a lot of work unless you are very particular. We wanted something kind of unique and were also on a tight budget (we paid for the wedding ourselves), so it was a bit of extra work and fuss for our casual wedding in a park than a more traditional formal wedding would have been. Even so, it was really quite manageable. Feel free to PM me if you have specific questions about wedding planning stuff!

As far as relationships - I agree with the above, that both you and your partner have to make it a priority. I had perhaps the best situation because my husband works from home, but it was still taxing at times. When you are stressed, it's going to put some degree of stress on the relationship. The best thing you can do is find ways to minimize and deal with your stress so you don't take it out on your partner.
 
dreams said:
just wondering if some of you med students could let me know if you had a relationship going into school, did it last? If so any secrets? If not anything you would have done differently?
Click to expand...

Hey. Well it's truely something that you have to go into with someone that you really like...and want it to work with. My first year of med school I was dating a guy that I knew that i didn't want to make it work with...and that relationship was hard...because i didn't put forth anything to make it work...I was "busy" all the time. Broke up with him and had some alone time...and met the love of my life. And i wanted it to work with him...and it did. I'm in Blacksburg, Va and he's in Baltimore and we still made it work. Saw each other when we could...made him and school a priority. He knew not to make me choose because med school was something I was working on before him.
Well anyway a year after dating we became engaged and we are getting married this November...so it can work if you want it to. 😍
 
I feel like one of the make-or-breakers in my class was distance. The long distance ones can be pretty hard. But they can work. You've got a better shot if you live in the same town. My boyfriend and I met the December before med school, and now we're in the same class. We try not to study together, unless we know we're not going to see each other any other way that week, and we have Friday night dates. And for one of our classes we sit together, because it's not as intense a lecture. We just try and respect each others' needs, be there when we can (although sometimes it's tough since we both stress out at exactly the same time, during exams), and make our time together count, so that it's quality, and not centered around school. The toughest problem we had was when everyone in our histology group thought we'd really want to work together, so we worked at the same microscope for a month-and-a-half. (We don't work very well together in a work setting.) So we both learned a lot, and got better at it, and quickly learned better ways to respect each others' habits. But we're doing great. Best of luck!
 
I have a feeling that it much easier for us girls to make our relationships work than for guys. Women need sooo much more attention than men do, even if you are not a needy girl... girls still need more than boys. So I think that in order for a guy to make it work while in med school, they really need to be able to devote time to their partner regardless of how much work med school is. My husband doesn't really care too much if I have to spend 2 weeks straight just studying 24/7; he just gets to spend more time on the computer, and he knows we'll hang out after test block is over. For a guy, his girlfriend/wife will likely not be able to tolerate 2 weeks of zero attention. I wouldn't be very pleased if the roles were reversed. So guys may have to sacrifice studying more than girls do in order to make it work, or they need to find a rare girl out there that is very low maintenance.

As other posters have said, it really is all about whether or not it is worth it to you to put in the effort. If you want it to last, you'll try hard to make it do so. If you are only half-heartedly into it, it probably won't work out.
 
It's incredibly difficult, whether or not your significant other is in medicine.
 
if you are an attractive female, it will not work. give up, and let me take you out.

on a more serious note, it depends on two people, you and the partner, 50% each. however, your story is a little more complicated.

what do you want? to be the best damn surgeon in the world, or be a family practitioner and work 9-5. do you want that 250/99 step 1 or a 200/80 enough to get you in some community peds program? if the former, your partner better be very, VERY understanding. if the latter, then itll be tough, but ur 50% is doable.

the partner's 50%. he/she will not understand the concept of studying for an exam 2 weeks in advance and still feeling behind. he/she will not understand how someone can work >80hrs a week and be at the hospital overnight. he/she will get jealous that your patients get more of your attention than him/her. it happens, how well can they control it?

i want to be the best damn surgeon in the world. i work hard for what i want. this meant studying >8 hrs a day, research >4hrs a day. with all that other stupid stuff, eating, showering, sleeping, my girlfriend was getting very little time. she said she understood. she claims she still does, even after leaving me for another guy, who's not in medicine, and is living a very average life.

we don't live average lives. your partner must understand that, and you must find a balance, and that may mean giving up stellar grades/step 1 score/research to get that top neurosurgical/ortho/plastics/gen surg spot in the country. that may mean not putting in ridiculous hours on your clerkships to go home to your boyfriend/girlfriend, and foregoing honors (time does not equal good grade, but it certainly helps, especially for surgery).

whats important to you, how understanding is he/she? when u can really answer this, you have your answer.
 
-Goose- said:
It certainly can last, but you have to make it a priority. It is very easy to let school consume your life because there is so much to do that you could conceivably spend every waking moment studying. You have to carve out time where you turn it off. It was hard for me first year, but you adjust and this year is much better. As for 3rd/4th year, I don't know.

Good luck.
Click to expand...

Agreed. He/she has to be your best friend at all times and you have to check yourself. It's tough to make time. I know a woman who got married in school and has made it a priority to devote every Saturday to her man. I'm trying that, but it's really hard when you know things are going to hit the fan on Monday. I think it works to devote a certain expected time slot you both can look forward to during the hellish week.

Caboose.
 
My S.O. and I get along great. However, I'm not going to lie and say it's not hard sometimes.

Our situation is really interesting because our schedules have always been kind of opposite. When we were together in college, she was in an ungodly hard major, working crazy hours, etc. I was no slouch being premed, but nothing that compared to the time she was putting in. And after I was accepted and sitting pretty, she was working her absolute hardest.

One time when she came home particularly frustrated and found me playing videogames on the couch she said tersely (and I remember this vividly) "I can't wait until you're in med school and have to work hard"

Now, we're flipped. Her hell in school got her a good job that she gets lots of free time in. I'm in med school working my nuts off. It turns out she was wrong, she kinda preferred the old way, where I was available to her more times than not in the limited time she had off. Now, she has plenty of free time, but it's hard to work me into it.

But in a way, it's given us an appreciation for eachother. We know that time apart isn't because there isn't love or passion or desire there or whatever, it's just the reality of the situation, and don't hold it against the other.
 
dreams said:
just wondering if some of you med students could let me know if you had a relationship going into school, did it last? If so any secrets? If not anything you would have done differently?
Click to expand...

Yes, and yes. The secret is to make at least one day of the week about them. Threwout med school I made saturday night and all day sunday about my girl. We called it super sunday, and I basically did whatever she wanted which mainly included shopping, movies, beach, bicycling etc. During the weekdays I'd study once I'd get out of school until about 7pm and then we'd go to the gym together, I'd come back from the gym study for a few more hours and then we'd cuddle in bed/sleep. So this is where we spent most of our time together. During third year medicine, surgery and ob/gyn rotations was probablly the hardest on our relationship with the overnight call. But those where just 1-2 months periods at a time, no biggy.

Now in my internship it is a whole different ball game. I've been on 3 hard months straight and it has taken it's toll. Worked halloween, thanksgiving, christmas, new years. We used to love going out on these holidays together not anymore. With the overnight/night float weeks, long hours, I get home I'm to tired to chat much, and I have to study at little for step 3 each day. On weekends when I do have one day off I usually just spending it sleeping in to try and make up for lost sleep. We don't work out much together anymore, mainly cuz I'm too tired to work out as often and when I do workout I go straight to the gym when I get off to save time driving back to the gym. She just doesn't get off early enough to meet me at the gym. She also has a hard time sleeping when I'm not in bed with her. So for the few weeks I've been on night float she goes out with her friends, and starts telling me she enjoys it when guys give her attention. She tells me she needs a BF who gives her attention and can take her out. She also wants more commitment from me but I say I don't want to get married or can afford kids until I'm out of residency. I have a hard time taking care of myself as it is now, let alone a family on what I make. So she moved out and left me. I've been pretty sad and just had the vent.🙁

So to the op med school and relationships no problem. Residency and relationships=problem.
 
Wow, Long Dong. Apparently she didn't realize how good she had it. I'm sorry that happened to you.

*hugs*
 
It depends on too many factors to list. My wife is completing her residency this summer and I'm currently an M1. The residency is the hardest because of the changing hours and horribly long shifts in your internship. We have two kids (one just born) and that doesn't help much. It is nice to be with someone who has been through what your going through and can therefor be understanding...
 
Well, it's been more than a semester and so far I'd say a decent amount of the relationships are holding up. And even the ones that didn't make it only tended to have ended very recently.

Some girl's even still in a (long distance) relationship she had just started before med school, which personally baffled me but seems to work for them (they do fly up/down a decent amount).

Anyways, as of yet no divorces =p
 
I'm a second year. I'm still with my girlfriend, who is currently a third year law student 5 hours away in Vermont (I'm at NYMC). We're both busy and have spent a lot of lonely nights apart, but we've been together long enough to know when to give for the career and when the career needs to give for the relationship. If you're dating one of those people that builds their entire life around the relationship, you're not going to be able to reciprocate as a medical student. You'll strike a balance point somewhere between you, your mate and school.

If both of you are flexible in your planning and in your expectations of the relationship while you're in school, it can work out just fine. It's not going to be smooth sailing the whole time, but it's not impossible if you think the relationship is worth it.

Edit: I forgot to say that she discussed coming down here to move in with me for 3rd and 4th year and I told her straight up what it's going to be like: Me gone for 50-80 hours a week of in hospital time, plus studying outside of that for exams with her basically having no one else that she knows around to support her while she tries to get her feet under her professionally. I told her I didn't want to put her through that just so we could "live together" . She, being the patient woman that she is, got pissed off that I didn't want her to move in with me. Fortunately, she came to her senses after thinking about how much it would suck to not have any support network in a new state with a boyfriend who's not aroun. I'm looking at EM, which will give me SOME flexibility in the future, but in the meantime, we'll just deal with how things are.
 
Came into medical school with a long distance girlfriend, and that didn't work out. We'd been together a year and a half, and just got tired of not seeing each other often enough.

Then, I started dating another girl a couple of hours away, and thought things were great. She was two years ahead of me in school. We were 'perfect for each other' and all that, but once she moved away to start her residency in another state, things slowly fizzled to where we ended up breaking up a year and a half into her residency. I'm going into surgery, she's in peds, and really wanted me to go where she is for residency, but I hated the program and the fact that she'd already moved off from me once. Why should I have to follow her and choose a program I already didn't like?

That was the surest sign, to me, that we did not need to get married. Neither one of us were willing to compromise our careers even an inch to make things work out. That happens in medicine sometimes. I talked to my program director about it, and he said there's a lot of unrealized selfishness that goes into medicine, the surgical disciplines in particular. Things like, "I have to work these hours, I have to learn this stuff, I have to take care of this patient, I have to cover for this other resident..." and so on and so forth. It's tough, and takes a very understanding person to make it last.

On the other hand, my PD also said, "Son, you know for the rest of your life YOU are going to be a surgeon. You can always marry someone else." 😀
 
Raidergate said:
Things like, "I have to work these hours, I have to learn this stuff, I have to take care of this patient, I have to cover for this other resident..." and so on and so forth. It's tough, and takes a very understanding person to make it last.
Click to expand...

Yeah that's basically all the conversations I had with my exgirlfriend the last few months and would end it with I'm tired and need to sleep. She got tired of hearing it so she left.
 
Long Dong said:
Yeah that's basically all the conversations I had with my exgirlfriend the last few months and would end it with I'm tired and need to sleep. She got tired of hearing it so she left.
Click to expand...
That hot white girl left you dong? Bummer!🙁
 
This is such a great thread, because every one of us goes through this at least once during our medical journey...

When i first started med school, I had been in a relationship with my b/f for 2 years, we talked about getting engaged and all that stuff, and he was a great guy up to that point.... but then school started and I was super busy and an hour and a half away...we broke up at the end of my first semester. In a fantastically twisted sort of way med school is a really good way to dodge bullets and weed people out in the dating world. If they can withstand the test of time--awesome! If not, you just saved yourself trouble down the road. Either way, it's a pro instead of a con.

You're going to want to find someone that is really understanding, patient, emotionally strong, NOT needy (a different guy I recently dated was too needy and couldn't deal....hence, end of relationship), and will tell you when you're being a pain in the *** without starting a blow out fight the night before an anatomy exam. Most ppl not in med school won't understand why you just can't call off work, or not study (like you did in undergrad), and that is going to be frustrating to you at times. On the other hand, prying yourself away from powerpoints and books for an hour to pay attention to your significant isn't going to kill you.... the relationship should be a team effort. You are going to have to remember to put yourself in your s.o's shoes, especially when rotations and residency come around... you just can't work 100 hours a week and be normal... and your other half is going to have to put up with your cranky zombie butt during this time. So if you think this person is worth it, then keep it going.... many relationships work out, and many don't. It all depends on you and the other party.

Being single during med school is a good deal too, I have no complaints😀 I hope everything works out for you the way it's meant to be.
 
Captain Fantastic said:
My wife and I married the summer between her M1 and M2 year. We had kid #1 the summer before her M4 year. She did an IM residency. Kid #2 came her PGY3 year.

As a spouse, the first two years were pretty straight forward since her schedule was a lot like undergrad. By the second year she was talking almost completely in the language of medicine, which was a bit alienating. Third year was a big change, with a completely new schedule. It was pretty easy to adjust, though. Her intern year was the worst -- an incredible amount of inpatient/on-call time and we now had a son to watch after. I suppose it was the transitions that were the hardest. Once you get into the routine, it really doesn't seem so bad. Plus, you realize that you can put up with just about anything for four weeks.

The worst part was how many days would go by without seeing her. She'd be up before me, gone all night, arrive home post-call while I was at work, slept through until the next morning. I made it a habit to take the children by the hospital for a family dinner in the cafeteria when she was on call. Sometimes she's get paged and have to take off, but often it was enough that the kids remembered what she looked like (LOL).

I'm satisfied with how we handled it. I don't think I would have done anything differently.

Now it's my turn as the medical student. It will be interesting to see things from the other side of the coin.
Click to expand...


Depressing yet insightful yet positive all in one. Thanks !
 
Long Dong said:
Yes, and yes. The secret is to make at least one day of the week about them. Threwout med school I made saturday night and all day sunday about my girl. We called it super sunday, and I basically did whatever she wanted which mainly included shopping, movies, beach, bicycling etc. During the weekdays I'd study once I'd get out of school until about 7pm and then we'd go to the gym together, I'd come back from the gym study for a few more hours and then we'd cuddle in bed/sleep. So this is where we spent most of our time together. During third year medicine, surgery and ob/gyn rotations was probablly the hardest on our relationship with the overnight call. But those where just 1-2 months periods at a time, no biggy.

Now in my internship it is a whole different ball game. I've been on 3 hard months straight and it has taken it's toll. Worked halloween, thanksgiving, christmas, new years. We used to love going out on these holidays together not anymore. With the overnight/night float weeks, long hours, I get home I'm to tired to chat much, and I have to study at little for step 3 each day. On weekends when I do have one day off I usually just spending it sleeping in to try and make up for lost sleep. We don't work out much together anymore, mainly cuz I'm too tired to work out as often and when I do workout I go straight to the gym when I get off to save time driving back to the gym. She just doesn't get off early enough to meet me at the gym. She also has a hard time sleeping when I'm not in bed with her. So for the few weeks I've been on night float she goes out with her friends, and starts telling me she enjoys it when guys give her attention. She tells me she needs a BF who gives her attention and can take her out. She also wants more commitment from me but I say I don't want to get married or can afford kids until I'm out of residency. I have a hard time taking care of myself as it is now, let alone a family on what I make. So she moved out and left me. I've been pretty sad and just had the vent.🙁

So to the op med school and relationships no problem. Residency and relationships=problem.
Click to expand...

SoCuteMD said:
Wow, Long Dong. Apparently she didn't realize how good she had it. I'm sorry that happened to you.

*hugs*
Click to expand...

^ SCMD beat me to it; my thoughts exactly.
 
you guys made me feel a lot better. i will be applying this summer. my boyfriend and i have been together since senior yr of high school (cute no?).. weve been through quite a bit together and plan to move in together for our senior yr in college. he will be applying to chem phd programs and we are trying to find places in the same city...
i want to try very hard for us to live together for med school as that may make things easier? we shall see each other a little more often at least i think. any opinions?

until i saw long dong message.. so sorry.. *hug*
 
Long Dong said:
Thanks guys.



Yeah everytime someone says my ex GF was pretty hot, I say dang did I mess up.🙁
Click to expand...

At least you got that derm residency.
And at least she wasn't with you for your money.
 
Re3iRtH said:
At least you got that derm residency.
And at least she wasn't with you for your money.
Click to expand...

Hey Long Dong, seeing you're an intern, how do you have time to get on these forums? is derm res not as demanding as other fields?
 
sendwich said:
Hey Long Dong, seeing you're an intern, how do you have time to get on these forums? is derm res not as demanding as other fields?
Click to expand...

Hmm, also interested in this... (what kind of s1 score / course grades did you have?)
 
Re3iRtH said:
At least you got that derm residency.
And at least she wasn't with you for your money.
Click to expand...
Yep broke as a joke. Competing with all these rich guys in LA and OC promising my EX this and that.

sendwich said:
Hey Long Dong, seeing you're an intern, how do you have time to get on these forums? is derm res not as demanding as other fields?
Click to expand...
I'm an intern doing a transitional year right now doing my 2 months of peds. There is alot of down time in the hospital doing not much of anything just waiting around for kids to be delivered/meconium deliveries/c-sections, but I still have to be here ~12-14 hours a day, 6 days a week. Alot of rotations have been like that even trauma surgery we round in the morning and then pretty much wait all day and night for traumas to come in somedays/night are busier then others. But there is always a few minutes of downtime threwout the day or night.

As for derm I start later this summer, and yes derm is not that demanding mostly Mon-Fri about 8-6 at the program I'm going to. Only thing is where I'm going is one of the few places that has an inpatient derm service, those hours might be longer with call, this is only for 5 months though.

exi said:
Hmm, also interested in this... (what kind of s1 score / course grades did you have?)
Click to expand...

As for step 1 the average for derm was around 238 last year. My step 1 was 259, step 2 250, honored half of my 3rd year rotations (no honors given at my school in year 1&2), eventually published 2 papers, and 1 pathology poster.
 
i got married in my first year of medical (yes, DURING! my first year... it was fine 🙂 and we went on our honeymoon over spring break)

this year things are fine.. my husband is incredibly supportive, he has been with me through everything so he knows the drill, and i 'prep' him for what is to come - currently it is for boards in a few months. friday nights are his nights - i don't study or do anything school related, just spend time with him!

we are actually in the process of trying to conceive - hoping for a baby here in third year sometime!

My relationship/family is my priority - not medicine - that is how i run my life, that is the choice i made/am making. It is absolutly different for everyone, but it definatly takes work at times to help him understand my schedule and to work through the hectic times that will come up in the future will not be easy, but we can do anything together!

good luck!
 
Anyone know of med student/pharmacy student marriages? Or suggestions about being married M1 year?
 
Long Dong said:
Yep broke as a joke. Competing with all these rich guys in LA and OC promising my EX this and that.


I'm an intern doing a transitional year right now doing my 2 months of peds. There is alot of down time in the hospital doing not much of anything just waiting around for kids to be delivered/meconium deliveries/c-sections, but I still have to be here ~12-14 hours a day, 6 days a week. Alot of rotations have been like that even trauma surgery we round in the morning and then pretty much wait all day and night for traumas to come in somedays/night are busier then others. But there is always a few minutes of downtime threwout the day or night.

As for derm I start later this summer, and yes derm is not that demanding mostly Mon-Fri about 8-6 at the program I'm going to. Only thing is where I'm going is one of the few places that has an inpatient derm service, those hours might be longer with call, this is only for 5 months though.



As for step 1 the average for derm was around 238 last year. My step 1 was 259, step 2 250, honored half of my 3rd year rotations (no honors given at my school in year 1&2), eventually published 2 papers, and 1 pathology poster.
Click to expand...

Heheh thats pretty funny. I actually had no idea you went into derm,
I just read about your Step 1 score earlier on here. And I said "at least
you got derm" more as a joke. Is it really that easy to just gauge that
someone with a score like that will do derm? Maybe I shouldn't be
surprised one bit.
 
here's the thing: once you get to med school you realize quickly that your time really isn't yours anymore (especially for 2nd and 3rd year). it's hard for someone not in medicine to understand the pressure at work, of overnight call, and that when you come home from it sometimes you just need to crash and tell everyone to f&*k off while you sleep. this is never something that an SO wants to hear, and they usually won't tolerate it that easily, at least not for the long haul. however, if you have the upper hand in the relationship (you know if you do or do not) you might be fine. i know that i was much, much more fun before medical school and now my GF jokingly calls me "boring." which is true. it's like we med students are feeling the pull of the black hole of a great professional life. it feels like moving toward a magnanimous ghost on the other side of graduation. the pressure/responsilibity definitely reshapes who you are, and thus who your SO sees you as. (this hospital elevator music is killing me, by the way; "just the two of us" followed by "carribean queen.") 🙄
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

ecobio
Bench research... Worth it as a med student?
Replies
9
Views
679
Tenk
Tenk
S
  • Question Question
MD/MBA for entrepreneurial aspirations, worth it? will it help?
Replies
11
Views
2K
djo208
D
A
Away rotation for neurology - should I do it?
Replies
2
Views
1K
collegestud2013
C
EvanHansenFan
What does it take to match into a top IM Program?
Replies
2
Views
3K
Shunsui
Shunsui
J
Non-US IMG Anesthesia application: how likely is it?
Replies
2
Views
978
jpedro
J
Top