Seems to be the season for rants...So why not?

[bigDee]

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I can tell that the OP is quite intelligent and often, although unfortunately, community colleges do not foster an academic/intellectual fervor. I believe that you would enjoy taking courses at a university rather than a CC. Universities offer more resources to bright students (such as Honors programs, research, major related clubs, etc) and you encounter far fewer mediocre students. Although you're still at a CC, focus on getting the best possible grades and taking classes in preparation for university. In my short life, I've realized the beauty of this quote: " Honor them when they honor you; disrespect and disregard them when they vilely treat you." You obviously know what you want to do but you should realize that not everyone is happy with your successes.

By the way, I'm an African American who listens to Black Sabbath and reads classic literature so I know what it is like to be seen as an oddity.

This really doesn't fix anything. Going to a university with more academically competent people won't change anything. There will always be people who will ask how you did on a test and if you tell them your score they may judge you for it or compare themselves to you.

OP I understand your problem and I think a lot of the advice you heard here is correct. This is how I would play it. Whenever someone asks how you did on a test just give them a vague answer. Don't say "I dont care about my grades and neither should you" because that's not going to get you anywhere socially. But give a vague response like "I did good" and when/if they press for more details just straight tell them what you made. Don't say it excitedly, don't try to modestly downplay it, just tell them. If someone is super curious how you did there's no reason to hide it, in an attempt to prevent them from judging you. If they really are a judgmental person then they will always find some way to measure your self worth compared to them so you might as well let the cat out of the bag right now.

I understand what you said earlier about there being a friendly environment where test scores were open and it fostered friendly competition. But I don't think it ends there at the point where people are just curious what you made and use it to motivate themselves. This can work with some people your friends with but some people really take it to heart and will use grades as a measurement of your selfworth as a person.

It's the same thing with money. People may and most likely will judge you based on how much money you have especially if you have a lot more than them. Even if they consciously don't want to it may happen subconsciously.

 

[Freesia88]

Oh dear... its alive again!! That's it I am going to become a donor so I can kill this farking thread

 

[bigDee]

Oh I just realized this was an older thread. someone linked to it from another

edit: I'm curious on an update here on how things have been going for you this semester. Has there been another time when someone asked for you grade and how did you handle it?

 

[La Presse]

There is no way I can say this without coming across either as whiny or arrogant or worse both so I am just going to say it. Hopefully, I'm not the only person on here who feels this way, seeing as we're all overachievers to an extent.

Why is it that I feel like I have to apologize for or downplay the fact that I am an above the average student to get along with my class mates? I will admit that I get impatient with my classmates who are slackers and have been known to be patronizing, however it seems like I get along with everybody untill they see or hear about my score on the latest exam then it's like I am trying to show them up. I cannot offer advise regarding studying , ask a question in class or correct someone elses error without getting looks and eye rolls.

I am proud of my GPA ( I work my a** off for it, after all), I am proud of the fact that I am self aware and able to articulate myself clearly. I am proud of the fact that I am a conscientious and dilligent student. Why do i feel like I need to downplay that aspect to fit in?

Not to play the race card but I feel like the situation is made worse by the fact that I am black and African. It feels like I am expected to be just a little dumber than the average person, speak English with a heavy accent, totally clueless about urban lifestyles and modern technolgy. WTH?

As a fellow African-American, or rather African, the need for an ego is increased. However, I am notoriously known for being at the top of my game academically and am able to argue advanced concepts effectively in a Socratic discussion. Most people do not pull the race card, but when they do, they are very, very sorry.

I seclude myself from people Africans naturally because their presence fuels competition inherently. It's good to bRag and boast of your accomplishments. It's healthy and everyone does it.


Sent from my iPad using SDN Mobile app.

 

[bigDee]

I seclude myself from people Africans naturally because their presence fuels competition inherently.

You oughtta get past that man you shouldn't let there be any barrier between you becoming aquainted with any group of people, even your own, especially your own.

It's good to bRag and boast of your accomplishments. It's healthy and everyone does it.

It's actually not good to brag and boast about it. Just read what I posted above, when you tell people your accomplishments, especially bragging about it, people are going to judge you to be a pompous ass.

 

[La Presse]

You oughtta get past that man you shouldn't let there be any barrier between you becoming aquainted with any group of people, even your own, especially your own.


It's actually not good to brag and boast about it. Just read what I posted above, when you tell people your accomplishments, especially bragging about it, people are going to judge you to be a pompous ass.

That's great. I don't give a **** about what others think.


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[bigDee]

That's great. I don't give a **** about what others think.


Sent from my iPad using SDN Mobile app.

I think its great if you don't let other people's opinions affect you. But to not care about what people think of you, is in my opinion, grossly irresponsible.

How people think of you may be correlated with how they treat you, and it's certainly correlated with what they are willing to do for you. You'll never know when you'll need someone's help to do something you otherwise couldn't possibly do on your own. For all you know, there could be a few students in your class who don't like you, and when they talk to the professor about other unrelated issues in private, they may happen to mention how much of an ass you are. So when it comes time for you to ask for a LOR, even if you're very nice to the professor there's no way he can ignore the fact that multiple random people called you an ass.

And you also know it's a big no no to boast about yourself in an interview right? I'm just giving you a heads up. All this applies to every aspect of life too, not just grades.

 

[La Presse]

I think its great if you don't let other people's opinions affect you. But to not care about what people think of you, is in my opinion, grossly irresponsible.

How people think of you may be correlated with how they treat you, and it's certainly correlated with what they are willing to do for you. You'll never know when you'll need someone's help to do something you otherwise couldn't possibly do on your own. For all you know, there could be a few students in your class who don't like you, and when they talk to the professor about other unrelated issues in private, they may happen to mention how much of an ass you are. So when it comes time for you to ask for a LOR, even if you're very nice to the professor there's no way he can ignore the fact that multiple random people called you an ass.

And you also know it's a big no no to boast about yourself in an interview right? I'm just giving you a heads up. All this applies to every aspect of life too, not just grades.

I have been educated well in social intuition, so it is assumed that I'll make the best of it.


Sent from my iPad using SDN Mobile app.

 

[Itisneverlupus]

OP, as I am not in class with you, I am simply going to speculate.

Perhaps they roll their eyes when you ask your questions. Maybe they don't know every single test score that you have received. However, I do go to school with several people that often ask questions they know the answers to, and begin explaining while asking the question. Others ask questions that may be a bit too far into depth for the scope of the lecture, and these questions are better off directed to the professor during office hours or outside resources (textbooks, internet, etc.).

There is nothing wrong with asking questions, but be advised that certain questions, and certain ways of going about asking them (tone) come off as arrogant. People tend to become very annoyed when they perceive questions from others as very high end, and often unnecessary. I also have a great deal of questions, but I write them down, continue with the lecture, and try to look them up for myself. Part of being a physician is learning how to search outside resources for reference. If I do not find what I am looking for, I will approach the professor outside of class.

best,

IINL