starting personal statement with an experience related to medicine, not good?

[clubwestpua]

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I wrote my personal statement while waiting for my transcripts to be processed.

My initial interest in dentistry, so called the hook, starts with my experience at homeless clinic. But my experience at clinic was more medicine related since I checked vital signs and recorded patients' symptoms and medications, and the only dental part was arranging an appt to a free dental clinic which is another place. I did write my inspirations gained while shadowing dentists and volunteering at student dental clinic in one of body paragraphs. Do you think this is a risky move since I let them know that I was once a premed and volunteered at this homeless medical clinic?

 

[Stacker]

I wrote my personal statement while waiting for my transcripts to be processed.

My initial interest in dentistry, so called the hook, starts with my experience at homeless clinic. But my experience at clinic was more medicine related since I checked vital signs and recorded patients' symptoms and medications, and the only dental part was arranging an appt to a free dental clinic which is another place. I did write my inspirations gained while shadowing dentists and volunteering at student dental clinic in one of body paragraphs. Do you think this is a risky move since I let them know that I was once a premed and volunteered at this homeless medical clinic?

I think it was a bad idea unless you're withholding from us some connection of that medical experience to the dental experience. Did you somehow suggest that through that medical experience you discovered that it was not for you subsequently leading you to become interested in dentistry? It also depends how much space your medical experience takes up in your essay compared to the dental one.
I hope you don't take my interview spot. 🙂

 

[RU1992]

^Above post is right. You have to show some way that the medical experience allowed you to realize something wasn't right and shifted you towards dentistry. I did the same thing in my personal statement. It's not bad that you were originally pre-med and shifted to dentistry; heck, you could argue that you're now certain that dentistry is for you. Once again, I'm in your same shoes.