Step 1 studying and dealing with family

[sneakysnek]

---

Members don't see this ad.

Recently i've been invited to several family gatherings, all of which i've had to decline. I've had to explain to my family members that I can't take any days off because of my dedicated period, to which they just reply "but you can study a bit at aunt Marie's place" or other nonsense. It's hard for them to comprehend exactly how much i'm studying - i've even told them, but it somehow doesn't sink in.

This has been taking an emotional toll on me lately because I feel like I let them down, like i'm avoiding them. This creates a loop of thoughts whether I should just go to these gatherings or not, and why they won't understand my situation etc. Also this is a part of the family I only meet once or twice a year, hence why it feels so wrong to not sacrifice a day or two for them.

How would you guys approach this?

 

[Tenk]

Assuming your test isn’t in the next two weeks, just go to one. It’s just one day and sometimes it’s good to take a break. One day of studying won’t make your score. Added stress can definitely break your score.

 

[ciestar]

Taking breaks is okay.

 

[studentdocftw]

I took every Sunday off during my dedicated. Maybe did a light review of weak subjects...watched a movie...hung out with friends...that one day off was crucial to my sanity and continued efficiency during the other 6 days of the week.

 

[mistafab]

I took off 1 day every week all of med school, including dedicated. How efficient are your really if you never take a break? The added anxiety from avoiding your family is just not worth the trouble.

 

[mrbreakfast]

Like everyone else, I agree that you really don't have an excuse not to spend a few hours at a family BBQ or whatever.

I didn't take any days off during dedicated but took a lot of scheduled "light days." I scheduled each day into 3 sections of study (morning, afternoon, evening) and later on in dedicated was taking a break for one of those three sections several times a week, just to go to the park or something.

 

[libertyyne]

Take a day off and go, or if you don't want to, don't. This profession is going to make you miss a lot of events. It is a good time to come to terms with that and accept that. People outside are not going to understand. That's ok as well. You have to be selfish and be ok with it.

 

[Mass Effect]

If you don't want to go, don't go. But using studying as an excuse is a cop-out. If you're studying all day every single day, you're doing something wrong.

 

[deleted407021]

If you don't want to go, don't go. But using studying as an excuse is a cop-out. If you're studying all day every single day, you're doing something wrong.

That’s not a very charitable read of OPs post.

 

[Mass Effect]

That’s not a very charitable read of OPs post.

The OP is of the mindset that he/she can't take "any" time off and has to study all the time. I gave advice to dispell that mindset. Not sure where it was indicated that I had to be charitable or that I wasn't?

 

[Sephirakra]

Recently i've been invited to several family gatherings, all of which i've had to decline. I've had to explain to my family members that I can't take any days off because of my dedicated period, to which they just reply "but you can study a bit at aunt Marie's place" or other nonsense. It's hard for them to comprehend exactly how much i'm studying - i've even told them, but it somehow doesn't sink in.

This has been taking an emotional toll on me lately because I feel like I let them down, like i'm avoiding them. This creates a loop of thoughts whether I should just go to these gatherings or not, and why they won't understand my situation etc. Also this is a part of the family I only meet once or twice a year, hence why it feels so wrong to not sacrifice a day or two for them.

How would you guys approach this?

This is one of those rare situations in which not being able to stand one's family is a blessing. I never attend any gatherings, and it's wonderful.

Just look for reasons to hate your family, and this guilt will disappear! /s

 

[jurassicpark]

It's up to you. Everyone copes with studying and stress differently. If you feel not having those extra few hours is going to make the difference than absolutely your family needs to understand your concerns, needs and priorities right now. Missing out on a BBQ or two is not the end of the world. That being said, I always made time for Battlefield, or Counterstrike.

 

[Planes2Doc]

It was hard to take breaks, but at the end of the day, they really did help and kept me on track. Hopefully they will understand the sacrifices you need to make for your medical career, literally. Honestly, unless people are in medical school, they do not understand what the workload entails. A guy I used to be friends with asked me why I didn't have a job in medical school. When I explained to him about the workload, he had the audacity to tell me I'm "doing it wrong."

On a side note, Step 1 will be the most important exam of your life. Study hard.