This video series should help you:
Generally, remember that bases abstract protons and nucleophiles attack in substitution reactions.
Two important categories to have straight are strong base/strong nucleophiles compared to strong nucleophiles only. For example, RO- like HO- (hydroxide) CH3O-, CH3CH2O-, ect. are both strong bases and strong nucleophiles. On the other hand, CN-, H2S (or any sulfur that is neutral or with a negative one formal charge), N3-, halides, among others, are strong nucleophiles only.
An important thing to remember is that substitution and elimination reactions both require good leaving groups to occur.
For SN2 reactions, they most often occur on primary substrates, usually with a strong base/strong nucleophile OR with a secondary substrate with a strong nucleophile only. Preferentially, the solvent would be aprotic in most SN2 reactions.
For halogens acting as nucleophiles in PROTIC solvents, the nucleophile strength goes:
F- < Cl- < Br- < I-
For APROTIC solvents:
I- < Br- < Cl- < F-
For E2 reactions, they most commonly occur on secondary or tertiary substrates with strong base/strong nucleophiles or strong bases only (only one you really need to remember is tert butoxide). Remember that bulky bases like tert butoxide favor the Hoffmann product while strong bases that aren't bulky favor the Zaistev product. Remember E2 has the huge limitation: the beta proton must be antiperiplanar to the leaving group.
Big thing to notice: a secondary substrate reacted with a strong base/strong nucleophile will go E2 over SN2.
E1 and SN1 undergo carbocation intermediates and thus prefer tertiary substrates. A big indicator that a reaction will go E1 or SN1 is a weak base/weak nucleophile. The only example I can think of off the top of my head is some form of ROH, like HOH (water), CH3OH, CH3CH2OH, ect. So basically if you get ROH and a tertiary substrate, you are likely looking at an E1 or SN1 reaction. Heat can be used to favor E1 over SN1.
Remember SN2 reactions kinetically depend on concentration of substrate and concentration of the nucleophile, whereas for SN1, it only depends on concentration of substrate.
Please let me know if you have questions. I tutor/SI for organic chem and would love to help you if you are still struggling.