Wow, hard decision. From my perspective, $60-$80K is a ton of money and isn't enough to make me want to pay out-of-state rates when I could get the same education at in-state rates. However, I would ask you to consider a few questions.....
1. As a graduate student, can't you change to in-state after a year? If you are really determined to go to Michigan, why not transfer your residency there so you'll only be out-of-state for the first year, and then get in-state rates for the rest?
2. What about other 'hidden' expenses, like cost of living, wardrobe, vehicle maintenance, utilities, etc? Unless you've included that in your $60-$80K difference, I'd guess that over 4 years of school, just the difference in cost of living alone would make it a $100K gap.
3. I love North Carolina and would live there in a heartbeat if it was realistic right now, so I admit my view is biased. But what is it about Michigan that attracted YOU, what's YOUR feeling about the school? If you're ambivalent about Michigan compared to UNC, I recomend you tank Michigan and go with the substantially cheaper school.
4. If you feel the schools are "very similar," that's just a ton of money you could save on loans that, ultimately, you'llhave to pay back. Think about what that means after graduation- you could be driving a nice new mid-price car, or you could be limping the old beater along while you pay back those ginormous loans. You could be making payments on a house you own, or you could be renting a 2-bedroom cheezer. You could be planning and starting the life that you expect to have with this major career choice, or you could be looking at holding that off for another 5-10 years while you get those loans paid down.
I don't envy your position, having to make what is, for you, a difficult choice. For me, it's not difficult at all- UNC all the way!
