Who would win a.....

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MountainPharmD

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UFC style cage match fight between a retail pharmacist and a clinical hospital pharmacist?

Probably a dumb question...hands down the retail pharmacist would destroy the clinical pharmacist. We have mad skills.....

In case your wondering where this came from. The How do I deal with this thread has sort of turned into this so I thought I would start a new thread.....
 
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It's a toss-up. The retail pharmacist could knock 'em out with the phone that they always have in-hand, while the clinical pharmacist could throw their PDA.
 
It's a toss-up. The retail pharmacist could knock 'em out with the phone that they always have in-hand, while the clinical pharmacist could throw their PDA.

Yeah, but to throw the PDA they would have to get out of thier chair which would cause a nasty cramp.....Retail still wins....Plus my phone has a 50 foot cord so I could throw it and pull it back like a boomerang....
 
Is either side allowed to bring Trissel's Injectable Drugs into the ring? My favorite handbook that also doubles as a deadly weapon.
 
Retail, hands down.

1. Since we're standing all day and making short runs all over, the calves are developed. You will easily deliver lethal roundhouse kicks to the head.
...Or (if you don't wear compression hose) you have edema. You'll have to compete in the seated division.

2. We're multitasking masters of the universe; so that means we can see anything coming from all angles and respond accordingly...

3. We're mentally tougher. We don't try to hijack threads 'cause we don't like them. We duke it out until it's over. In short, we deal with the best of the best and the worst of the worst (patients).

Let the flames begin!:laugh:
 
That's really funny MountainDewd! :laugh: It reminds me of Celebrity Death Match.
 
Yeah, but to throw the PDA they would have to get out of thier chair which would cause a nasty cramp.....Retail still wins....Plus my phone has a 50 foot cord so I could throw it and pull it back like a boomerang....

What kind do you have? Mine keeps kinking up.😀
 
Is either side allowed to bring Trissel's Injectable Drugs into the ring? My favorite handbook that also doubles as a deadly weapon.

All weapons are allowable. You can't administer any drugs in any dose form or in any method of delivery, though.
 
I am going to bring my gang with me to keep order. They are a group of 80 year old ladies who hit the donut hole in July because they insist upon having brand name necessary on every prescription. All I have to do is point to the clinical pharmacists and say "those guys say you need to take generics because they are just the same". Fights over retail wins again.....

I can see it now.....Zpack "blah blah blah vanco dosing Q 80 hours blah blah blah" Priapism "no I just read a recently published cliical trial that says blah blah blah new drug blah blah blah q 90 hours novel drug blah blah blah". Then whack upside the head with a walker and a rascal power chair!
 
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UFC style cage match fight between a retail pharmacist and a clinical hospital pharmacist?

Probably a dumb question...hands down the retail pharmacist would destroy the clinical pharmacist. We have mad skills.....

In case your wondering where this came from. The How do I deal with this thread has sort of turned into this so I thought I would start a new thread.....

No match.
We can spray some sevo gas now generic then a shot of versed then start CI dexmedetomidine.

Then insert a foley and strap u with adult diaper.

We won't forget to intubate u.

Thread over.
 
No match.
We can spray some sevo gas now generic then a shot of versed then start CI dexmedetomidine.

Then insert a foley and strap u with adult diaper.

We won't forget to intubate u.

Thread over.

Ahhhh you forget speed is of the essence. It would take you a week to gather all the supplies. Then another week to draw up the power point presentation to explain to everyone what you want to do. Then another week to debate the appropriate course of action and make changes. And then another week.......

On your first day of gathering supplies the retail pharmacist would grab a copy of the HIPPA regulations and whack you upside the head with it all the while filling 500 scripts and spending 5 hours on the phone with an insurance company.....and not even break a sweat....Retail wins again...
 
Ahhhh you forget speed is of the essence. It would take you a week to gather all the supplies. Then another week to draw up the power point presentation to explain to everyone what you want to do. Then another week to debate the appropriate course of action and make changes. And then another week.......

On your first day of gathering supplies the retail pharmacist would grab a copy of the HIPPA regulations and whack you upside the head with it all the while filling 500 scripts and spending 5 hours on the phone with an insurance company.....and not even break a sweat....Retail wins again...
I love it!
😍
 
lol...next time you're teaching your foley/intubation tube insert class you let us know!

Z-pack forgets that just because these things happened at a hospital he worked at doesn't mean he can actually do them. Same goes for actual work. I am sure there were people who did do some work at a hospital he was at. That doesn't equate to him actually doing any real work....:laugh:
 
Ahhhh you forget speed is of the essence. It would take you a week to gather all the supplies. Then another week to draw up the power point presentation to explain to everyone what you want to do. Then another week to debate the appropriate course of action and make changes. And then another week.......

On your first day of gathering supplies the retail pharmacist would grab a copy of the HIPPA regulations and whack you upside the head with it all the while filling 500 scripts and spending 5 hours on the phone with an insurance company.....and not even break a sweat....Retail wins again...

I have young and fast interns, residents, and techs to do all that
 
I'm not gonna tell "YOU PEOPLE" again---READ the thread!

ALL WEAPONS ARE ALLOWED EXCEPT YOU CANNOT ADMINISTER DRUGS IN ANY WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM!!!

So I guess Z-pac won't be able to use his big, swinging clinical penis.

Thread's not over, b*tch.
 
Z-pack forgets that just because these things happened at a hospital he worked at doesn't mean he can actually do them. Same goes for actual work. I am sure there were people who did do some work at a hospital he was at. That doesn't equate to him actually doing any real work....:laugh:

Can I be on your team? Tag me, dude!
 
I'm not gonna tell "YOU PEOPLE" again---READ the thread!

ALL WEAPONS ARE ALLOWED EXCEPT YOU CANNOT ADMINISTER DRUGS IN ANY WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM!!!

So I guess Z-pac won't be able to use his big, swinging clinical penis.

Thread's not over, b*tch.

Forgive Z-pack...He is what we call "administration". They never listen to anything or anyone.
 
Nuclear pharmacists.......please......Come on you can't even sneak up on anyone because
you glow in the dark....

Now you've done it. She's gonna start hijacking the thread by talking about pictures or antibiotics in Israel or attics...

Roundhouse KICK to the head, followed by a FLYING Jimmy Snooka!:laugh:
 
Now you've done it. She's gonna start hijacking the thread by talking about pictures or antibiotics in Israel or attics...

Roundhouse KICK to the head, followed by a FLYING Jimmy Snooka!:laugh:

You got that right!!! So loo what kind of camera lense would you use to capture a fast action shot such as a round house kick to the head?:meanie:

Spiriva will tell us!!!!!:laugh::laugh::laugh:
 
OK. The clinical RPh wheels itself out in its comfy chair to the center, grasping a metallic-covered PDA with razors sticking out...

My first move would be to pull out my glass pill tile, then hurl some big, metal spatulas at 'em to distract...

Then I tag MountainPharmD...
 
lol!

Hey Mountain...you never tell us anything about your bikes...what are you riding these days?

NOOOOOO!!!!

Don't answer! She's found our weakness. Damn you, Spiriva!

Change in plan. I whip out my cyclocross bike and bunnyhop over ya. Then I trackstand for the crowd!!!!!
 
I am on team hospital but think about all the crap retail pharmacists put up with. We deal with nurses who want stat tylenol while they deal with gunpoint in the drivethrough with a waiting room of patients who are eating snickers waiting for their metformin.
 
I think Pharmavixen has everyone beat. :nono: She works in a prison pharmacy.
 
Since I do not travel anywhere without my ivory tower or high horse, the cage would have to accommodate them or I would not agree to the match. Once the starting bell has rung, I will just sit atop the tower (like it is supposed to be when comparing clinical to retail pharmacists, duh) and lob heavy textbooks, which I use to obtain my clinical pearls that make me sound smart, at the peons (retail pharmacists) standing at the base of the tower trying to chop it down with their tablet counting spatulas.

Once all of the retailers have been sufficiently pummeled, I will travel on the high horse to all the nearest Walgreens and get all of their customers (errr....patients) out of their donut holes because physicians actually take me seriously when I want to discuss pharmacotherapeutic decision making. I will convince them that the patient does not need linezolid, or aliskiren, or nebivolol, or extended release carvedilol, and will make physicians, patients, and the health system happier. I win!!!
 
I am on team hospital but think about all the crap retail pharmacists put up with. We deal with nurses who want stat tylenol while they deal with gunpoint in the drivethrough with a waiting room of patients who are eating snickers waiting for their metformin.

Point taken. Let's add idiot nurses to the cage. Show me your moves, hospital girl...
 
Since I do not travel anywhere without my ivory tower or high horse, the cage would have to accommodate them or I would not agree to the match. Once the starting bell has rung, I will just sit atop the tower (like it is supposed to be when comparing clinical to retail pharmacists, duh) and lob heavy textbooks, which I use to obtain my clinical pearls that make me sound smart, at the peons (retail pharmacists) standing at the base of the tower trying to chop it down with their tablet counting spatulas.

Once all of the retailers have been sufficiently pummeled, I will travel on the high horse to all the nearest Walgreens and get all of their customers (errr....patients) out of their donut holes because physicians actually take me seriously when I want to discuss pharmacotherapeutic decision making. I will convince them that the patient does not need linezolid, or aliskiren, or nebivolol, or extended release carvedilol, and will make physicians, patients, and the health system happier. I win!!!

Blah, blah, blah. You can't travel anywhere, silly! You're attached to some MD's rectum...

I do my Trinity-suspended-in-midair-butterfly kick to your head. That should stop you from talking...permanently.

Agent Smith will say, "Clinical pharmacists, your man is already dead."
 
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Oh, and the answer is wherever I'm working that day. I'll beat all your asses.

Come in the cage and back that up, nebulous job boy!

I think I spelled "nebulous" right...

Extended erection boy, look that up for me, willya?
 
Correction: automatic fire weapons, nuclear devices, and biological weapons are not allowed.

Thank you for reminding us of weapon possibilities, military pharmacists.
 
After a Public Citizen lawsuit, the FDA is recommending Black Box warnings for fluoroquinolones concerning the medication class's ability to cause tendon damage. You retail mofos need to pay attention to this one for your customers on repeat courses of ciprofloxacin for that UTI that just will not go away, although I know you are too busy counting (cash, tablets, and capsules) and closing down at 1700 on the dot to counsel the patient or make a useful intervention.
 
After a Public Citizen lawsuit, the FDA is recommending Black Box warnings for fluoroquinolones concerning the medication class's ability to cause tendon damage. You retail mofos need to pay attention to this one for your customers on repeat courses of ciprofloxacin for that UTI that just will not go away, although I know you are too busy counting (cash, tablets, and capsules) and closing down at 1700 on the dot to counsel the patient or make a useful intervention.

Look. Look at the clinical pharmacist pleading for his life.

Full body SLAM.
 
Or the 6th course of levofloxacin you've dispensed this winter for that nagging sore throat and sniffle.
 
MountainPharmD, need a tag.

Gotta mow my lawn now.

In the words of Gov. Schwartzenegger, "I'll be back".
 
Or the 6th course of levofloxacin you've dispensed this winter for that nagging sore throat and sniffle.

Called the doc. Told him. He says "no" 'cause that's not what the PharmD at the hospital recommends...

Neck CHOP followed by KICK in the groin.
 
Since I do not travel anywhere without my ivory tower or high horse, the cage would have to accommodate them or I would not agree to the match. Once the starting bell has rung, I will just sit atop the tower (like it is supposed to be when comparing clinical to retail pharmacists, duh) and lob heavy textbooks, which I use to obtain my clinical pearls that make me sound smart, at the peons (retail pharmacists) standing at the base of the tower trying to chop it down with their tablet counting spatulas.
That was obvious. If you can't come down into the real world, you aren't of any use in a fight, which we already knew.

MountainDewd, I'll need to barrow your telephone boomerang because that erection lasting longer than 4 hours hasn't learned how to go back down a ladder. He's been climbing for so long that he's pasted up the point of no return. The lowly "peons" will have to save him, but only if he's lucky.
 
Or the 6th course of levofloxacin you've dispensed this winter for that nagging sore throat and sniffle.
It's July. Helloooooo... is anybody home in there? Earth to SDN, Earth to SDN. I think we have a confused resident who has lost his connection with the outside world.
 
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