Is anyone else nervous about starting med school?

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take the shot

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All I have dreamed about for the past 15 years is going to med school. Until I actually starting working on this goal I felt depressed, stagnant and only half alive. I worked incredibly hard to do well in my coursework and on the MCAT. I found out in November that I was accepted to the allopathic school of my choice: my dream was coming true and I was elated.

Now, here we are, just weeks away from actually starting. I find myself wondering if I am crazy to take this on. God, all the intense work I put in, the fear I wasn't going to get in...I accomplished what I've always wanted and now I have these crazy emotions hitting me. I have been so excited to start but now I am nervous about all that's coming my way. Just wondering if anyone about to start is also feeling this.

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Nontrad, your MDApps is amazing. So informative and really helpful. The adding of the figures at the end is a little depressing, but informative nonetheless. :p

Take the shot, I'm still a good year or so away from even applying, but I was a PR undergrad major, and now after 2 years, pre-med is finally here. You want something so bad, you work really hard for it, then you get it and it's like, "Oh ****. Really?" I'm nervous, but so relieved to finally be starting the journey.

Best of luck to both of you!
 
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I think if you were not at least a little nervous, that would be worse. It just means you are thinking about the difficulties lying ahead and nervous about the upcoming life adjustments.

I am so excited to get started, but I am nervous as well. Most of this is d/t upcoming move, change in income/insurance, etc. There is also the piece as to how I will adjust to the new teaching styles, increased volume, and long hours.

The move will happen, and we will deal with the change in income, etc. that come along with the venture. As far as school starting and the academics, it will come, I will adjust, and move forward.

Sounds easy, doesn't it? ;)
 
I think if you were not at least a little nervous, that would be worse. It just means you are thinking about the difficulties lying ahead and nervous about the upcoming life adjustments.

I am so excited to get started, but I am nervous as well. Most of this is d/t upcoming move, change in income/insurance, etc. There is also the piece as to how I will adjust to the new teaching styles, increased volume, and long hours.

The move will happen, and we will deal with the change in income, etc. that come along with the venture. As far as school starting and the academics, it will come, I will adjust, and move forward.

Sounds easy, doesn't it? ;)

:laugh: Ya, piece of cake! (About the move, let me know if you need anything. I can't move your crap, but I can provide some passive entertainment for your kids, and you know, pb&j sammiches).

OP, I'm freaked out, too. Part of it for me is that I'm about to have a baby on top of everything else, but frankly a lot of it is that, like you, I've been pre-med for a lot of my long adult life, and now I'm not... but I'm not a med student yet, either. I suspect that once it starts - once I'm sitting in classes, studying with other people and practicing how to auscultate a lung, the excitement will supercede the anxiety and ennui. I bet this is pretty common, the summer before M1...
 
Nervous? Yup.

Still though, I'm eager to get started. I'm tired of being unemployed.
 
Now, here we are, just weeks away from actually starting. I find myself wondering if I am crazy to take this on. God, all the intense work I put in, the fear I wasn't going to get in...I accomplished what I've always wanted and now I have these crazy emotions hitting me. I have been so excited to start but now I am nervous about all that's coming my way. Just wondering if anyone about to start is also feeling this.
Are you crazy? Yes, you are, so don't worry about that. ;) But, going to medical school as a non-traditional is an experience that I wouldn't have missed for the world, so - welcome aboard.

As a 47-year-old MS-IV, what I'm thinking is - there is no way to explain to you what's coming. All I can say is, you've made it this far in the process so there's about a 99% chance that you'll make it through just fine. You already have the "right stuff."

My own experience was - I thought that, after two years of pre-med courses at night while working a full-time professional job during the day, nothing could phase me. I was wrong. The memorization skills required in the first year of medical school were intimidating and overwhelming. My own adjustment to medical school was quite difficult - I lost of a lot of weight first semester and cried a lot - and wondered what in hell I'd done to my life. But, I adjusted, I rose to the occasion, did well, and survived. And you will, too, or you probably wouldn't have gotten in as a non-trad. By the second semester of first year I was pretty much an old pro at doing what was expected. Second year was much more interesting and more fun and I knew what to expect. Third year - well, as a non-trad, I was perhaps even more exhausted and stressed than some of my classmates. But I was finally beginning to practice real medicine on real patients - and I loved it. And you will, too!

Try to be flexible. Your lifestyle will change more than you can imagine. It's tough to adjust to having very little social life... and spending most of your days studying. You will recognize almost immediately that the change in economic circumstances is no big deal, because you will no longer have time to do things that cost money (I'm not trying to be funny - I'm serious about that). I used to care a fair amount about my hair and my clothes but in medical school that quickly became dead-last on my list of priorities - I don't know how many mornings I went to class with torn jeans with dirty hair under a ballcap and couldn't have cared less.

Lastly, TALK about your stress. Your classmates can be a huge source of emotional support, because they're going through the same thing. Your sig other and family will be a great source of comfort, but you'll get frustrated because they'll say things like "it can't possibly be that bad" when it bloody well is. One of my teachers said in my first year "only a physician or a medical student can understand what it's like to go through medical school." That's very true, so don't waste time being frustrated that your family can't truly understand how you feel. That's just how it is.

Enjoy your summer. Welcome to medical school. First year is going to be the rollercoaster ride from hell - but there are plenty of highs to go with the lows.
 
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Are you crazy? Yes, you are, so don't worry about that. ;) But, going to medical school as a non-traditional is an experience that I wouldn't have missed for the world, so - welcome aboard.

As a 47-year-old MS-IV, what I'm thinking is - there is no way to explain to you what's coming. All I can say is, you've made it this far in the process so there's about a 99% chance that you'll make it through just fine. You already have the "right stuff."

My own experience was - I thought that, after two years of pre-med courses at night while working a full-time professional job during the day, nothing could phase me. I was wrong. The memorization skills required in the first year of medical school were intimidating and overwhelming. My own adjustment to medical school was quite difficult - I lost of a lot of weight first semester and cried a lot - and wondered what in hell I'd done to my life. But, I adjusted, I rose to the occasion, did well, and survived. And you will, too, or you probably wouldn't have gotten in as a non-trad. By the second semester of first year I was pretty much an old pro at doing what was expected. Second year was much more interesting and more fun and I knew what to expect. Third year - well, as a non-trad, I was perhaps even more exhausted and stressed than some of my classmates. But I was finally beginning to practice real medicine on real patients - and I loved it. And you will, too!

Try to be flexible. Your lifestyle will change more than you can imagine. It's tough to adjust to having very little social life... and spending most of your days studying. You will recognize almost immediately that the change in economic circumstances is no big deal, because you will no longer have time to do things that cost money (I'm not trying to be funny - I'm serious about that). I used to care a fair amount about my hair and my clothes but in medical school that quickly became dead-last on my list of priorities - I don't know how many mornings I went to class with torn jeans with dirty hair under a ballcap and couldn't have cared less.

Lastly, TALK about your stress. Your classmates can be a huge source of emotional support, because they're going through the same thing. Your sig other and family will be a great source of comfort, but you'll get frustrated because they'll say things like "it can't possibly be that bad" when it bloody well is. One of my teachers said in my first year "only a physician or a medical student can understand what it's like to go through medical school." That's very true, so don't waste time being frustrated that your family can't truly understand how you feel. That's just how it is.

Enjoy your summer. Welcome to medical school. First year is going to be the rollercoaster ride from hell - but there are plenty of highs to go with the lows.
Thank you so much for taking the time to write about your experiences as a med student. The support really helps. I look around and see several other people/couples my age who are gearing toward vacations, fun, and relaxing...after working hard to accomplish much, now they can settle in and enjoy the fruits of their labor. I could have such an easy life and instead take on one of the hardest pathways possible. I think I am also worried how this is going to impact my husband who has been so supportive.

I also love that you commented on how you stopped caring about your hair and clothes! Going to the mall and checking out the season's new shoes and clothes used to rev me up. It just doesn't seem to be enough to keep me satisfied but I sure wish it was. My life would be so much simpler if I could be like most people I know but I've never been that way. Remember all the kids we hung out with when we were young who were easy-going, playful and never took things too seriously? I always needed more complex work and have always been deeply analytical. Emotions are tricky for me to understand but maybe my feelings are related to wishing I was not the intense, driven, deep-thinking individual that I am, always wanting to learn more.

I am glad you shared your description of "roller coaster of emotions" that you experienced. I'll remember that when I am heavy into the first semester.
 
:laugh: Ya, piece of cake! (About the move, let me know if you need anything. I can't move your crap, but I can provide some passive entertainment for your kids, and you know, pb&j sammiches).

...

:D Moving, or should I say, starting to in about 10 days... Nanon, I will totally take you up on the passive entertainment... that is of course, if you are not already in the hospital ;)
 
Of course I'm scared--it's only natural to get cold feet before you embark on something life-changing and difficult.

With apologies to "My Fair Lady":

"I'm starting med school in the morning,
Ding-dong the bells are gonna chime,
Feather and tar me!
Call out the Army!
But get me to the school on time ..."
 
There are days when I get butterflies just thinking about what I got myself into.

Like you, I am scared, nervous, excited, and everything in between:)
 
I have a close friend (pediatric attending) recently graduated. She gave me the best visual description of M1. She said it is like trying to drink water from a fire hydrant. :laugh:

I have kept lots of paperwork from my journey including the acceptance letter. I am planning on needing to pull those out to remind me how far I have come. That will help push me to keep going when things get rough.;)

Good luck to everyone! :thumbup:
 
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it's like getting married!
Funny you bring this up. When I think about it, I felt exactly the same way when I got married. My husband still laughs when he recounts how I recommended that we just keep dating: 2 days before we were supposed to get married and on the day we were moving out of our individual homes to the one we had built. And this was a guy who was the best thing that ever happened to me and with whom I was crazy in love. Something about the commitment thing scares me to death. I can only hope med school turns out to be as great as my marriage. Just have to take a flying leap and not look back.

I also appreciate what student 1799 said about how it's "natural to get cold feet before you embark on something life-changing and difficult". I think that getting accepted feels so great that it's easy to forget just what it REALLY means to go to medical school
 
I definitely have cold feet.

My kids are having a lot of separation anxiety (which I am grateful that they are being able to work through somewhat before we are actually separated). This certainly makes me question whether this is at all reasonable of a life goal... :(
 
I definitely have cold feet.

My kids are having a lot of separation anxiety (which I am grateful that they are being able to work through somewhat before we are actually separated). This certainly makes me question whether this is at all reasonable of a life goal... :(

I feel you. I just moved my family 2000 miles for this, and I'm starting to see some stress-related behavioral issues with my son (and my husband, for that matter... lol). It's all so much heavier - all of the decisions, all of the planning, when you're doing it for an entire family.

When I went back to work, my son had a lot of separation anxiety. What worked for us was extended cuddle time when I was home, and making sure there were lots of friends and family around. And finally, we got him into a kick-ass pre-school program. I'm hoping it works again when I go to school...
 
I am also a non trad that is scare to death......I knew my letter was coming that week. I remember telling a friend of mine "Either way, next week my life will never be the same. I am going to find out I got in, or find out I got rejected."

I spent so much time hoping, planning and dreaming about getting into school that when I knew the letter was coming I was like "Oh man I hope I get in, I hope I get in." when I opened my letter, sat down and realized I got in I was like "I got in! I got in! OMG I got in.........Oh no. What am I gonna do? I got in?!" I still laugh about it.........be afraid of what you wish for.

I have a friedn that is an MSIII. Just like me, he has a wife with two wonderful kids. We had dinner a couple wekends ago and I was asking how he balances it. He looked me straight in the eye and said "My wife mentions divorce once a day!"

I keep trying to prepare my wife, for what I THINK is going to happen..............."Sometimes you just gotta say WTF" --Joel Goodson
Risky Business
 
Kids are flexible and tend to adjust better than adults. I am worried about how my DH is going to handle all of this. I almost feel as if I am trying to scare him sometimes as I warn him about how different/horrible/stressful/chaotic our family life is about to become. But I feel like I need to try to prepare him so it is not a total shock when it comes. :scared:

My baby (** I know, she's two, but she is still my baby**) is the one I worry about most as far as the kids- my oldest is in school already, and the next oldest is so psyched about being able to go to school that she's been packing her bags for about 2 months. My little one still gets upset when one of us goes to work. We are starting her PT over the summer to give her a better transition. :xf:

Nanon- I am losing it trying to coordinate ~200 miles over 4 weeks. You guys picked up and moved 10 times the distance in no time! :bow:
 
Seriously, my highest regard goes to you med student mothers. It's hard enough as a new father looking ahead to balancing time with my wife and daughter (and future kids), but that juggling act is legions harder for mothers, especially when children are young.

My deepest admiration goes out to all of you!
 
Seriously, my highest regard goes to you med student mothers. It's hard enough as a new father looking ahead to balancing time with my wife and daughter (and future kids), but that juggling act is legions harder for mothers, especially when children are young.

My deepest admiration goes out to all of you!

Thank you!
 
Seriously, my highest regard goes to you med student mothers. It's hard enough as a new father looking ahead to balancing time with my wife and daughter (and future kids), but that juggling act is legions harder for mothers, especially when children are young.

My deepest admiration goes out to all of you!

:D Thanks so much!
 
I think we are doing the right thing keeping their environment the same - they will be staying in our house with my husband, near our friends and family. But I am still worried about only seeing them on the weekends. I will just have to study my ass off all week long so I can really be on as mom for them when I am home.

And thanks fogie! Your comments are much appreciated.
 
Yup, nervousness and excitement are fighting a war in my body on an hourly basis at this point. I was thinking the other day, though, that I feel more alive than I have in years. It would be really odd not to be fazed by such a major transition, but I'm looking forward to stretching myself to adapt...I was getting a little set in my ways, and miss the adventure.

You parents are amazing, I really respect what you are doing, along with your kids and SOs!
 
I think we are doing the right thing keeping their environment the same - they will be staying in our house with my husband, near our friends and family. But I am still worried about only seeing them on the weekends. I will just have to study my ass off all week long so I can really be on as mom for them when I am home.

And thanks fogie! Your comments are much appreciated.

i think all you parents will be pleasantly surprised at how much time you will actually be able to spend with your kids in the first two years. not so much in the third year, but at least you'll have that two year buffer. this is especially true if you are going to a school with minimal attendance requirements. that there is key.

i just finished my 2nd year. it was definitely a shocker at first, but after about 1.5 months, you get used to it. overall, i was definitely more stressed out as a non-trad pre-med working full-time than i have been so far in med school. (going to a p/f school is also really nice.)

btw -- to fogie -- as a future female parent, what makes you say it's harder for the mothers than fathers? just curious. i'm having my first child in a few months, and i'm wondering what is going to make it harder for me than for my husband. is there something more than the breastfeeding that will differ between us? not trying to be testy, just wondering what to expect ...
 
When I went back to work, my son had a lot of separation anxiety. What worked for us was extended cuddle time when I was home, and making sure there were lots of friends and family around. And finally, we got him into a kick-ass pre-school program. I'm hoping it works again when I go to school...

Dude, you sound like a cool mom. My parents moved all the time and I never got extended cuddle time. In fact, I don't even think I got cuddle time.
 
...after working hard to accomplish much, now they can settle in and enjoy the fruits of their labor. I could have such an easy life and instead take on one of the hardest pathways possible. I think I am also worried how this is going to impact my husband who has been so supportive.

I'm glad so many of you are here and experiencing this. My wedding is 50 days away. We were going to start having kids after that. He's the only one I've been willing to consider having kids with. I always thought I wanted kids by the time I was 30 (I'll be 30 in 6 months). We just bought a wonderful home in a great neighborhood for the kids. All the savings went into it (right before the housing meltdown). The night before the letter came I was walking the dogs with my fiance saying how nice life with him was and if even if I didn't get accepted it would be okay as our lives were opening up for another journey. We live very comfortably, I only work part-time, and have a lot of hobbies.

Then it came. And I almost said no. The glitch is that I would have to move 2000 miles away and put my life on hold again. Or at least it feels like I'm putting it on hold again. Just when I decided I was going to go forward. I've been working for this for 6 years and I would say no if it came down to it for a life with him. Yet, there would be a part of me that wondered. In the end it was him who convinced me to go. He didn't want to be a part of any regret in my life. We could still have children in a few years, this won't come again. There's no way my husband could move with me. There's just no work in the area that would give him 1/2 of the salary he gets right now. He would lose what he's been working for. Add on top of that the sixty thousand in loans every year.

So every now and then I tell myself I can still say no. I'm pretty sure I want to do this. I'm just feel like I'm on the ledge about to jump in. Like cliff diving (which I've done). I like the sensation but it scares the bejesus out of me.
 
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Thanks for starting this thread, take the shot. I feel exactly the same way. I'm leaving a very secure, pleasant job with tons of autonomy and free time to embark on this crazy rollercoaster of madness. I have questioned myself so many times since I got my first acceptance phone call (my first emotion was total thrill, and the next, half a second later, was dread).

In fact, for about five months, I meditated on the idea that I didn't have to go just because I was accepted. The choice for me went something like this: I could keep my easy, lots-of-free-time, mildly rewarding job, or I could go a quarter of a million dollars into debt to pursue a difficult, challenging dream that I wasn't sure I could handle on one or more levels. But my easy job had more than once had driven me to the point of despair that I wasn't being fulfilled and making use of my talents, and every time I imagined not going to med school, I couldn't. When I finally told my boss that I was leaving, I still felt a little nervous, but my fear was mostly replaced by relief and excitement now that my decision was made.

I guess we all know that it's going to be challenging - but that's what we signed up for, right? I'm glad I'll have you all along for the ride here in the nontrad forum! I think we need a class of 2013 thread for us all to check in on during our MS 1 year (mine starts in less than a month).

And Non-Trad Tulsa, thank you so much for all of your thoughtful posts. I find your perspective very resonant with my own, at least at this point, and your thoughts were a comfort when my anxiety about the decision was at its maximum.
 
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btw -- to fogie -- as a future female parent, what makes you say it's harder for the mothers than fathers? just curious. i'm having my first child in a few months, and i'm wondering what is going to make it harder for me than for my husband. is there something more than the breastfeeding that will differ between us? not trying to be testy, just wondering what to expect ...

I just think the emotional and physical toll of post-partum and the maternal instinct demands more from moms than dads in that first year.My wife has a harder time getting sleep than me. Nursing and pumping every 2-4 hrs is draining. She feels guiltier than me when she's away from the baby. Not only do I think she's shouldering more burdens than I am, but she's handling it better than I ever would. I'm honestly in awe of her.
 
I just think the emotional and physical toll of post-partum and the maternal instinct demands more from moms than dads in that first year.My wife has a harder time getting sleep than me. Nursing and pumping every 2-4 hrs is draining. She feels guiltier than me when she's away from the baby. Not only do I think she's shouldering more burdens than I am, but she's handling it better than I ever would. I'm honestly in awe of her.

I think this varies and depends on the situation. For me, my wife spent two months traveling for work when my son was 7 months old. The bond that my son and I have is very strong and I already get emotional about the time I'm about to lose with him. Either way, I think that life is all about quality and not quantity. When you're at school/work give 100%. When you're at home give 100%. Am I rambling on...ahh to many dos equis!
 
I think this varies and depends on the situation. For me, my wife spent two months traveling for work when my son was 7 months old. The bond that my son and I have is very strong and I already get emotional about the time I'm about to lose with him. Either way, I think that life is all about quality and not quantity. When you're at school/work give 100%. When you're at home give 100%. Am I rambling on...ahh to many dos equis!

Oh I agree, I don't think either situation is better or worse and varies family to family. But I just think having children requires greater sacrifices and juggling from mothers in the beginning. If I want to have more children in the next few years (and I do) I don't have to go through 9 months of pregnancy, morning sickness, hormones, labor, postpartum, pumping, and more hormones. I won't have to study while recovering from an episiotomy. I won't suddenly be told I have to be on complete bed-rest during a core rotation. I won't have to be a resident while waddling around with swollen feet, backpain, pro-dromal labor, mastitis, etc. I'll have more flexibility on when and how much time I take off with each child. It's just plain easier for me to have children during medical training than for moms. Which is why I have so much respect for women who manage to pull it off. My sister-in-law had two children during medical school. My close friend gave birth twice during residency. I honestly don't know how they did it.
 
Oh I agree, I don't think either situation is better or worse and varies family to family. But I just think having children requires greater sacrifices and juggling from mothers in the beginning. If I want to have more children in the next few years (and I do) I don't have to go through 9 months of pregnancy, morning sickness, hormones, labor, postpartum, pumping, and more hormones. I won't have to study while recovering from an episiotomy. I won't suddenly be told I have to be on complete bed-rest during a core rotation. I won't have to be a resident while waddling around with swollen feet, backpain, pro-dromal labor, mastitis, etc. I'll have more flexibility on when and how much time I take off with each child. It's just plain easier for me to have children during medical training than for moms. Which is why I have so much respect for women who manage to pull it off. My sister-in-law had two children during medical school. My close friend gave birth twice during residency. I honestly don't know how they did it.

Did your wife put you up to this? Just kidding! I agree with this totally.
 
Oh I agree, I don't think either situation is better or worse and varies family to family. But I just think having children requires greater sacrifices and juggling from mothers in the beginning. If I want to have more children in the next few years (and I do) I don't have to go through 9 months of pregnancy, morning sickness, hormones, labor, postpartum, pumping, and more hormones. I won't have to study while recovering from an episiotomy. I won't suddenly be told I have to be on complete bed-rest during a core rotation. I won't have to be a resident while waddling around with swollen feet, backpain, pro-dromal labor, mastitis, etc. I'll have more flexibility on when and how much time I take off with each child. It's just plain easier for me to have children during medical training than for moms. Which is why I have so much respect for women who manage to pull it off. My sister-in-law had two children during medical school. My close friend gave birth twice during residency. I honestly don't know how they did it.

:thumbup:

Totally agree that it is a time of uncertainty, and for us pre-med/med students/residents/attendings that is particularly hard. We are used to planning everything out to the minute, and ignoring our own needs to follow that plan.

Then you get pregnant. And unfortunately that plan we no longer control. It's a little hard for some of us to handle ;)

But, after that whole pregnancy thing and once you hit that 6-8 week pp mark, the stress level totally depends on the situation you have in your household. We do a pretty straight 50/50 split on duties, so once we got past that point, it was less stressful.

Gotta love it when you are with someone who cooks, cleans, does laundry, and is an awesome parent! :love:
 
:thumbup:

Totally agree that it is a time of uncertainty, and for us pre-med/med students/residents/attendings that is particularly hard. We are used to planning everything out to the minute, and ignoring our own needs to follow that plan.

Then you get pregnant. And unfortunately that plan we no longer control. It's a little hard for some of us to handle ;)

But, after that whole pregnancy thing and once you hit that 6-8 week pp mark, the stress level totally depends on the situation you have in your household. We do a pretty straight 50/50 split on duties, so once we got past that point, it was less stressful.

Gotta love it when you are with someone who cooks, cleans, does laundry, and is an awesome parent! :love:

Word!!! :D Otherwise, I would lose what is left of my flimsy composure. Btw, I went into labor the other night, and then stalled at 4cm. :mad: No, it's all good. Little guy is only 36 weeks, and needs a few more days to bake. But I gotta say, this kinda sucks. Lots of things women are. Weak is rarely one of them. ;)
 
Yikes Nanon, I'm glad he's hanging out for a bit longer! I hope your hubby is forcing you into rest and relaxation to keep it that way. :)
 
That's the best way to have a baby! 4 cm one day. Then the next 6 a couple of weeks later. Really shortens your labor the day of... :)
 
Word!!! :D Otherwise, I would lose what is left of my flimsy composure. Btw, I went into labor the other night, and then stalled at 4cm. :mad: No, it's all good. Little guy is only 36 weeks, and needs a few more days to bake. But I gotta say, this kinda sucks. Lots of things women are. Weak is rarely one of them. ;)

That's what my baby did at 37 weeks!!! :rofl:

They didn't check me, cuz they knew it would be c/s, so they did some monitoring, then decided to call everyone in for the c/s.

My darling child then decided she would wait to make her appearance; I went from :eek: every three minutes to :sleep:.

Apparently she needed the extra 1.5 weeks to grow (10-7 at birth) :rolleyes:

Good luck with everything!!! (and let me know if you need a sitter- I will be there off and on starting Thursday night!):soexcited:
 
Thanks for starting this thread, take the shot. I feel exactly the same way. I'm leaving a very secure, pleasant job with tons of autonomy and free time to embark on this crazy rollercoaster of madness. I have questioned myself so many times since I got my first acceptance phone call (my first emotion was total thrill, and the next, half a second later, was dread).

In fact, for about five months, I meditated on the idea that I didn't have to go just because I was accepted. The choice for me went something like this: I could keep my easy, lots-of-free-time, mildly rewarding job, or I could go a quarter of a million dollars into debt to pursue a difficult, challenging dream that I wasn't sure I could handle on one or more levels. But my easy job had more than once had driven me to the point of despair that I wasn't being fulfilled and making use of my talents, and every time I imagined not going to med school, I couldn't. When I finally told my boss that I was leaving, I still felt a little nervous, but my fear was mostly replaced by relief and excitement now that my decision was made.

I guess we all know that it's going to be challenging - but that's what we signed up for, right? I'm glad I'll have you all along for the ride here in the nontrad forum! I think we need a class of 2013 thread for us all to check in on during our MS 1 year (mine starts in less than a month).

And Non-Trad Tulsa, thank you so much for all of your thoughtful posts. I find your perspective very resonant with my own, at least at this point, and your thoughts were a comfort when my anxiety about the decision was at its maximum.
Ditto...I feel exactly the same way. For me it comes down to: can I accept my life the way it is or do I really need med school to fulfill my passion and life. Despite my nerves, I know this is where I have to be. This is right out of my inspiration song for getting in to med school, Go the Distance "...and a voice keeps saying this is where I meant to be"
 
I'm glad so many of you are here and experiencing this. My wedding is 50 days away. We were going to start having kids after that. He's the only one I've been willing to consider having kids with. I always thought I wanted kids by the time I was 30 (I'll be 30 in 6 months). We just bought a wonderful home in a great neighborhood for the kids. All the savings went into it (right before the housing meltdown). The night before the letter came I was walking the dogs with my fiance saying how nice life with him was and if even if I didn't get accepted it would be okay as our lives were opening up for another journey. We live very comfortably, I only work part-time, and have a lot of hobbies.

Then it came. And I almost said no. The glitch is that I would have to move 2000 miles away and put my life on hold again. Or at least it feels like I'm putting it on hold again. Just when I decided I was going to go forward. I've been working for this for 6 years and I would say no if it came down to it for a life with him. Yet, there would be a part of me that wondered. In the end it was him who convinced me to go. He didn't want to be a part of any regret in my life. We could still have children in a few years, this won't come again. There's no way my husband could move with me. There's just no work in the area that would give him 1/2 of the salary he gets right now. He would lose what he's been working for. Add on top of that the sixty thousand in loans every year.

So every now and then I tell myself I can still say no. I'm pretty sure I want to do this. I'm just feel like I'm on the ledge about to jump in. Like cliff diving (which I've done). I like the sensation but it scares the bejesus out of me.
Holy cow...my thoughts are with you as you work through this very tough decision.
 
nothing personal but that avatar/pic is creeping me out.
There are days when I get butterflies just thinking about what I got myself into.

Like you, I am scared, nervous, excited, and everything in between:)
 
I have to say Nanon, anytime I think my life is getting crazy - you top me! I too just moved 2000 miles with the kids and dog in tow - but not while 30+ weeks pregnant! You just reminded me to take a breather and relax. There is so much racing through my head about what I still need to do before school starts and here you are doing it just fine with a new baby on the way. Best of luck to you and your family, I know how hard you have worked for this and I know you will continue to do so. :love:

Oh, and btw - yes - I am absolutely nervous. You'd have to be crazy not to be!
 
Started packing today- the front porch I love to sit on in the morning is now littered with boxes and stuff. :(

Finished my last day of volunteering at a local ER- will miss everyone there, as they have been patient and included me on the more involved/cool cases. :)

It is all becoming a little more real now- I think it is good we are moving over the next few weeks rather than end of July/beginning of August. :)

Now if I could just figure out a way to get out of the last few weeks of my job, I'd be set! :laugh:
 
I have to say Nanon, anytime I think my life is getting crazy - you top me! I too just moved 2000 miles with the kids and dog in tow - but not while 30+ weeks pregnant! You just reminded me to take a breather and relax. There is so much racing through my head about what I still need to do before school starts and here you are doing it just fine with a new baby on the way. Best of luck to you and your family, I know how hard you have worked for this and I know you will continue to do so. :love:

Oh, and btw - yes - I am absolutely nervous. You'd have to be crazy not to be!

:laugh: I freak out every single day. Yes, things are moving along... but this has been the single hardest thing I've ever done in some ways. I'm trying to keep some perspective about it, but just knowing what classes I'll be taking next semester has sowed the seeds of real panic.

Good luck to you and yours, too! This is gonna be one WILD ride!!! :luck:
 
I not too nervous about med school. Its rescidency that I know will suck.
 
I am with you completely OP. In all of the years that I have prepared for admissions, studied for the MCAT, and survived the admissions hell....I have never had more doubts than I have now that I am 47 days from orientation. :scared::scared:
 
:thumbup: The maternal connection -especially one fortified by nursing and coddling and hormonal impulses is unique. Surely there are fathers who are just as torn by the sacrifices that this process requires, but a mother who has nursed and cared for a child from infancy will experience a visceral loss. Said feelings have caused me to seriously consider whether this whole process is worth completing. I don't think it really hits you until the reality of the time you'll be away from your child is staring you in the face.

I am a father that is torn.....I am not even considering giving up. It is too late to turn back now anyway. Though it does help to know that others are stressing out just as much.....

What do you think? Is it the fear of the unknown or the "I just want to stop thinking about it and just start it already" syndrome????
 
had some of the same inclinations...after working toward this for a couple years, and getting that e-mail, I finally had the ability to say "OK, now they want you.. do you want this?" Kind of like pushing against a brick wall and then noticing an open door; do I go in? What about all this energy that went toward getting through this wall?

thanks for posting all the great posts above; my kids are older (5+) and we're done; it must take massive dedication to go through this when kid(s) are young, especially for you moms. I feel like a wimp for being concerned about starting, while not even having to relocate for school or wake up with an infant. I am going to miss that "all the bills are current, have extra $$ to go out to a club this weekend, cars are running fine, making monthly student loan payments on time, no problem paying for any emergency expenses" feeling, I suspect. Oh well, it's only another 9 yrs until being in this situation again..
 
Well, after spending 8 hours working and then another 7 hours packing, driving, and unpacking, I have to say I am no longer nervous. I am over the moon excited!
:biglove: :soexcited::highfive::soexcited::biglove:

Driving into the city and getting into the apartment that will be home for at least the next four years was a very satisfying and almost comforting feeling. It just feels right. :D
 
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