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- Nov 19, 2004
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Hi everyone
I have a problem which I would like to discuss and please I will appreciate any kind of response. About 2 and a half years ago my fiance broke up with me. We were engaged for a year and I knew him for two years. The reason for the breaking up was weird. But, I am going to tell you so you can get the whole background. I met him in one of my classes he was a physician from middle east but he was unable to get a residency at that time. We became friends, he was doing his masters in computer science at that time and I was an under grad. Soon after we started dating I changed my major and so one day he asked me why i didn't take a specific course and I said it was waived for me. He thought I was serious and went and argued with the dean about not waiving the course for him and as a result I told him the truth and went and appologized from the dean, who said that it wasn't my fault the guy wanted to pick fight with him from the moment he came to this dept. Anyways later my fiance applied for residency and lied on the application ( i didn't know about that lie till much later), and got the residency, he didn't mention that he wasn't practicing for last 5 years. On the other hand when he left for residency he didn't tell anyone in the department and continued receiving his stipend. When the dean figured it out he went after him and fired him. Now the guy (my ex-fiance) became scared from the residency program director finding out about his lie (because the dean was calling every where to findout about him as he had lied to state of florida and received the pay checks) and so my ex-fiance went ahead and told the program director about his lie. The program director kind of gave him a sign that he might be fired for lying on his residency application. So he called me up and broke the engagment and said it all happened because of my not telling him about the change in major. He said that this is why the dean went after him. Later within six months he got married to a senior staff/faculty at his residency. Anyways it has been more than two years now, the first year and a half was very difficult as he was my first love but then I got over it. In fact now I am happy that it didn't workout. Actually during my masters I became very involved in medical informatics and now I am planning to go to medical school. Now today over the internet while searching for some medical informatics information I came across my ex-fiance's information including pictures. He seemed very happy. That seemed to bother me because I was raised believing that people who cheat or deceive others are never happy. What is bothering me is that he was the one who lied and cheated and hurt others and he is the one who is settled in his residency and is married. On the other hand I didn't do anything to bother anyone and I am the one who is taking the MCAT and has to go through the whole medical school requirements and is not settled. I became so angry after seeing this. I hadn't thought about him in a while but today it just annoyed me and the whole day I was upset. I don't know what to do about it. So please could anyone give me any advice. How should I deal with this anger or take this thinking out of my head or what should I do.
I have a problem which I would like to discuss and please I will appreciate any kind of response. About 2 and a half years ago my fiance broke up with me. We were engaged for a year and I knew him for two years. The reason for the breaking up was weird. But, I am going to tell you so you can get the whole background. I met him in one of my classes he was a physician from middle east but he was unable to get a residency at that time. We became friends, he was doing his masters in computer science at that time and I was an under grad. Soon after we started dating I changed my major and so one day he asked me why i didn't take a specific course and I said it was waived for me. He thought I was serious and went and argued with the dean about not waiving the course for him and as a result I told him the truth and went and appologized from the dean, who said that it wasn't my fault the guy wanted to pick fight with him from the moment he came to this dept. Anyways later my fiance applied for residency and lied on the application ( i didn't know about that lie till much later), and got the residency, he didn't mention that he wasn't practicing for last 5 years. On the other hand when he left for residency he didn't tell anyone in the department and continued receiving his stipend. When the dean figured it out he went after him and fired him. Now the guy (my ex-fiance) became scared from the residency program director finding out about his lie (because the dean was calling every where to findout about him as he had lied to state of florida and received the pay checks) and so my ex-fiance went ahead and told the program director about his lie. The program director kind of gave him a sign that he might be fired for lying on his residency application. So he called me up and broke the engagment and said it all happened because of my not telling him about the change in major. He said that this is why the dean went after him. Later within six months he got married to a senior staff/faculty at his residency. Anyways it has been more than two years now, the first year and a half was very difficult as he was my first love but then I got over it. In fact now I am happy that it didn't workout. Actually during my masters I became very involved in medical informatics and now I am planning to go to medical school. Now today over the internet while searching for some medical informatics information I came across my ex-fiance's information including pictures. He seemed very happy. That seemed to bother me because I was raised believing that people who cheat or deceive others are never happy. What is bothering me is that he was the one who lied and cheated and hurt others and he is the one who is settled in his residency and is married. On the other hand I didn't do anything to bother anyone and I am the one who is taking the MCAT and has to go through the whole medical school requirements and is not settled. I became so angry after seeing this. I hadn't thought about him in a while but today it just annoyed me and the whole day I was upset. I don't know what to do about it. So please could anyone give me any advice. How should I deal with this anger or take this thinking out of my head or what should I do.