ever feel very discouraged and overwhelmed by the competition? esp as a nontrad?

[pinkzebra]

my biggest problem is the fact that i really want to stay in boston. as nontrads, many of us have families we have to think of in the application process. at such a trying time in my life, i dont want to have to uproot my family. our daughter is 6 and at an incredible school - i am applying in two cycles to begin fall of 2013, so that means she will be almost 9 when i (hopefully) begin medical school, therefore 13 when i graduate. there is just no way that i would move her and my husband anywhere temporarily. we both love it here and have a big support system, so i really dont see us leaving unless it was somewhere close like CT or NY (he has fam in NY). even then, the thought is devastating. that unfortunately narrows down my school choices to tufts and BU, both of which i LOVE, but both of which are very tough to get into. i would say umass as well, but it is over an hour away from us. we need to be close to the city so moving closer to it wouldnt work, and commuting would be hellacious.

i guess im just venting/freaking out a little! the thought of the competition makes me a little crazy! anyone else ever feel this way?

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[LingoLaine]

Yes, for the exact same reasons I really need to stay in Colorado. There is only one MD school here. (The new DO school is too far from my husband's workplace to be a possibility). I have applied to Colorado only, and have yet to hear a peep from them this cycle. I will reapply next year and if still not accepted, will spread my wings out of state for a third application round.

I lived in Boston for 5 years and loved it. I met and married my husband there, and though I love it and miss it and wouldn't mind moving back there, I've got to say that real estate prices elsewhere can certainly help with the standard of living while in med school.

 

[pinkzebra]

lol i definitely agree, it is VERY expensive here. i grew up here for most of my life, though, and really couldnt see myself living anywhere else. there are so many other places i love, but the thought of leaving here is devastating.

 

[gunito]

Yes, for the exact same reasons I really need to stay in Colorado. There is only one MD school here. (The new DO school is too far from my husband's workplace to be a possibility). I have applied to Colorado only, and have yet to hear a peep from them this cycle. I will reapply next year and if still not accepted, will spread my wings out of state for a third application round.

It's in Parker, which is probably 35 min from CU Denver.


I had a 2.2 cgpa (now 2.65ish) and I just stay positive and see everything as an opportunity to show what I can do. Fortunately my girlfriend isn't tied down to work or anything so we can go anywhere.

 

[FiremedicMike]

I guess its just my personality (type A) but the competition doesn't concern me at all. I'm in the same boat as you, where moving is not much of an option, but being from Ohio, I have a few more options, I also don't mind driving an hour one way, especially considering the distance learning paths that are available, meaning I would only have to occasionally drive.

 

[FrkyBgStok]

i wouldn't say it is the competition necessarily, as in i don't think i compare. I really want to stay where i am at and i am just worried i won't be good enough. i fear they are gonna look at my app and say, "yeah he is competitive, but he is a douche" and then i have no chance.

 

[mauberley]

The way I see it, you can't control the competition. Only thing you can control is yourself and what you present on your application and in your interviews. That's more than enough to worry about without freaking out over everyone else.

But if it's just more the competitive nature of applying that's freaking you out, well, yes, I wholly sympathize. It doesn't help that you (quite reasonably) have limited your options--a lot of people cast a wide net because med school is so hard to get into in the first place. What tended to discourage me was my feeling that, for traditional applicants, there's a pretty set path to follow in undergrad that is what I feel most schools are more comfortable evaluating. Once you're out of that situation and have worked for awhile, it's not as straightforward to present yourself, especially on the primary app, and on the secondary app as well, to a lesser extent. I felt like the interviews were where my qualities would best come through, but getting past the filter of the written application is tough.

 

[1fastmedic]

I certainly can understand not wanting to uproot your family and leave your comfort zone. I have a wife and 2 girls (9 and 4) and they both go to good schools and my family is here, so we have a support group as well.

In my opinion, you NEVER turn down an acceptance to medical school. I discussed this with my wife way back before I even started pre-med. We both wanted to stay close to home, but decided that the benefits of becoming a physician usurped the benefits of staying here near home. I wanted to stay in NC, but an acceptance came early from a school in SC and I accepted. I would have accepted one further away if it had come. Regardless, my goal was to get into medical school, and I have achieved that goal, even though it wasn't near home like I wanted. Yes, I have to sell the house, uproot the family, etc., but eventually I will be a practicing physician and my family will benefit greatly from it.

Once you are a physician you will have unique opportunities. My wife has a great job, but she is willing to sacrifice it to enable me to complete this. Kids are resilient, they will adapt well. And hopefully your spouse will be willing to go. I hope that you are accepted close to home because it is ideal. However, if you get an acceptance, YOU GO, regardless of the location. A chance to matriculate in med school may be a once in a lifetime shot. I'm sure I read a forum on here where a guy turned down a DO acceptance to wait for MD acceptance, and so far no one else has accepted him. Don't let that be you! So, again, if you get acceptance, you go, regardless of location. Good luck!!

 

[Doctorella]

I think the commute to UMass from Boston is about an hour, on public transportation, and only about 40min by car. It's doable There were people in my SMP that commuted from Worcester, and although it's a pain, I think the cost savings of going to UMass would make it totally worth the trouble!

 

[cabinbuilder]

my biggest problem is the fact that i really want to stay in boston. as nontrads, many of us have families we have to think of in the application process. at such a trying time in my life, i dont want to have to uproot my family. our daughter is 6 and at an incredible school - i am applying in two cycles to begin fall of 2013, so that means she will be almost 9 when i (hopefully) begin medical school, therefore 13 when i graduate. there is just no way that i would move her and my husband anywhere temporarily. we both love it here and have a big support system, so i really dont see us leaving unless it was somewhere close like CT or NY (he has fam in NY). even then, the thought is devastating. that unfortunately narrows down my school choices to tufts and BU, both of which i LOVE, but both of which are very tough to get into. i would say umass as well, but it is over an hour away from us. we need to be close to the city so moving closer to it wouldnt work, and commuting would be hellacious.

i guess im just venting/freaking out a little! the thought of the competition makes me a little crazy! anyone else ever feel this way?

Not to sound too harsh ( I am a mother too) you really need to seriously look at how badly you want to get into medical school. To only limit yourself to one city is really not well thought out. Plus to say that your child is only 6 yrs old seems a little crazy to me. Bear in mind even if you were to get into medical school where you live now your will most definitely have to move for residency. NO ONE that I know of has done residency that close to medical school (with the exception of folks in San Antonio, TX). Keep that in mind 5 yrs from now when your daughter is 11. Kids are resilient and Boston is not the only place in the country with good schools. If that is what is important then do not expect to get into medical school and resign yourself to being a mother and putting location first. I will tell you that the kids WILL BE OK. I started medical school in 2001 when my kids were 2 and 5, I have moved 6 times in the last 10 years for medical school, residency, and current employment. I do not have any family at all, no parents, only my husband to support my household. My first move was 5000 miles, the second 2000, the third 2000, the fourth 1500, the fifth 1000, now looking to move again for another 1000. You can always move back but medical school/residency is 8-11 years of your life. THere is no way around it.

 

[pinkzebra]

1fastmedic - you are 100% correct and i really appreciate the way you worded that. thank you! you made me feel a lot better about the situation.

doctorella - you are correct, it is definitely doable. i would take it in a heartbeat to save on the tuition, despite the more lengthy commute than simply going into boston. i have also heard great things about umass and would be absolutely thrilled to go there.

cabinbuilder - i can completely understand your POV, but that doesnt change the fact that i really want to stay in the boston area. i have lived here for most of my life, being moved in high school to arizona, which really screwed things up for me. the second i could, i came back to boston for college and this is where i want to raise my family. my husband has a fabulous job, the schools here are incredible, and it is just "home" to us. i realize other places have great schools, but we are just really happy here. it IS possible to do med school and residency in one state. i realize that it is probably difficult to match, but i work with MDs that have families and completed med school, residency, and their fellowship all here in the boston area. i think 1fastmedic put it beautifully - you never turn down an acceptance to med school. if i get in somewhere else, i will of course take that as a true sign that perhaps that is where we are meant to be. however...i have a HUGE support system here! my family is on the west coast but i have endless friends that help out with our daughter all the time, not to mention that my husband's family is only a couple hours away in NY. me matriculating to med school and beginning this journey is going to take a LOT of support from my husband (which he has gladly agreed to), but i want to make things as easy as possible on him and our daughter. if THEY feel the most comfortable here, especially because i am going to be SO busy with school, we are all going to benefit from that. so while i agree with you that kids are totally resilient and things would work out, i know that this is the best possible place for me and my family. because of that, i want to work very hard to stay here. i am keeping an open mind but also praying a lot about it and having high hopes i can assure you that i really want this...i was pre-med all through undergrad and wanted to get my feet wet in the working world (doing research now) before i began school, not to mention to strengthen my application. however, i also want what's best for ALL of us, and honestly, that is boston.

 

[MCAT guy]

It all depends on the quality of your app.

> 3.6 cGPA
> 33 MCAT
> 200 clinical hours
* Great Personal Statement
* Great Essays + ECs or leadership activities
* Great Interviewer / Communicator of ideas and passion for field

Then you can stay in any city and be fine.

Reverse those requisites and you may want to become more flexible in your location. If you have half then it may be a toss up.

Same with matching. Matching what specialty (IM or Derm)? With LORs from who? With what Step 1 score? With AOA status, without? What grades in clerkships? Class rank?

I wouldn't worry about the match for now. Just focus on gaining an acceptance to a US MD school (or a DO).

 

[HenriMatisse]

I'm in the same boat as pinkzebra, my fiance has a "grownup" job in Boston and all of our family is here. I'd prefer UMASS over BU, Tufts, or Harvard(pipedream). Tuition is much less, education is just as good.

 

[pinkzebra]

I'm in the same boat as pinkzebra, my fiance has a "grownup" job in Boston and all of our family is here. I'd prefer UMASS over BU, Tufts, or Harvard(pipedream). Tuition is much less, education is just as good.

yes, totally understand how you feel. when are you applying? i am shooting for summer 2012 to begin fall 2013.

 

[CookDeRosa]

Not to sound too harsh ( I am a mother too) you really need to seriously look at how badly you want to get into medical school. To only limit yourself to one city is really not well thought out. Plus to say that your child is only 6 yrs old seems a little crazy to me. Bear in mind even if you were to get into medical school where you live now your will most definitely have to move for residency. NO ONE that I know of has done residency that close to medical school (with the exception of folks in San Antonio, TX). Keep that in mind 5 yrs from now when your daughter is 11. Kids are resilient and Boston is not the only place in the country with good schools. If that is what is important then do not expect to get into medical school and resign yourself to being a mother and putting location first. I will tell you that the kids WILL BE OK. I started medical school in 2001 when my kids were 2 and 5, I have moved 6 times in the last 10 years for medical school, residency, and current employment. I do not have any family at all, no parents, only my husband to support my household. My first move was 5000 miles, the second 2000, the third 2000, the fourth 1500, the fifth 1000, now looking to move again for another 1000. You can always move back but medical school/residency is 8-11 years of your life. THere is no way around it.

+1

I have 4 children, I understand. But to use the word devastating no less than twice re: pulling your kid out of grade school?....ehhh....that's a little dramatic. I'm not really understanding THAT. IMO, that's dumping too much pressure and guilt on your child. You are giving them too much power in a family decision; an adult decision. Talk about a guilt trip!! If you decide not do go, or can't get in locally, I hope you never share with your daughter that the REASON mommy couldn't go to med school was because of her. Not nice.

 

[tlshark]

I agree as well. Similar situations.

I was moved from Michigan to Pennsylvania during the middle of my junior year in high school. Really was not a cool situation. Something I said I would never do to my kids, once they started HS they would finish it where they started. My kids are 15, 12, and 6.

Having said all that, luckily I am in the Dallas area with multiple opportunities. However, since I had such a 'great' time in school the first time (before I was told to leave) I have to take advantage of the Texas Academic Fresh Start program, which means I am starting all over. So, I have several years before I have to worry about it.

Which is pretty much what I have decided to do. I am going to get the best grades I can now, and when the time comes, 2-3 years from now will address it then. There is plenty for me to stress about in life without adding something that may or may not happen 3-4 years down the road.

Don't worry, be happy!

 

[QofQuimica]

This is just another example of competing priorities, and unfortunately, they occur on a regular basis, especially in medicine. For the OP, if location is so important to you that you'd rather not go to med school than move, then what you're doing is entirely appropriate. The people who "don't understand" that decision are people who want to go to medical school badly enough that they're willing to sacrifice location. I'm not saying that as a judgment for or against either side; we all have to make our own call on that issue.

For me, location matters very little outside of not wanting to move to NYC, California or the Pacific NW. I'm fine with small cities, medium cities, Midwestern cities, Southern cities. In fact, it really annoys me when I go on interviews and they ask me why that city. I'm going, why not that city? I interviewed here because I'm interested in your program, and because it's not a city that I already know for sure I wouldn't want to live in! For the right residency program, I'm willing to move to almost any city, including cities that most other people would consider "undesirable," and including cities that I couldn't even find on a map before making travel arrangements to visit them. I don't really care about the specifics--I've lived in eight cities in five states, and all cities have good restaurants and culture and outdoor activities and all the rest of life's amenities, if you look for them. I've even managed to pick up a few new hobbies along the way because of living in so many different places. But I also recognize that I'm on the more extreme end of the location concern spectrum, and the reason why they're asking these questions is because a lot of people do care so much about location. Still, any of you PDs out there, please take note of my non-location bias, and stop asking me why that city.

 

[HenriMatisse]

yes, totally understand how you feel. when are you applying? i am shooting for summer 2012 to begin fall 2013.

I'm shooting for the same schedule. I was thinking summer 2011, but I've decided to slow it down and one burn end of the candle as opposed to both.

 

[pinkzebra]

+1

I have 4 children, I understand. But to use the word devastating no less than twice re: pulling your kid out of grade school?....ehhh....that's a little dramatic. I'm not really understanding THAT. IMO, that's dumping too much pressure and guilt on your child. You are giving them too much power in a family decision; an adult decision. Talk about a guilt trip!! If you decide not do go, or can't get in locally, I hope you never share with your daughter that the REASON mommy couldn't go to med school was because of her. Not nice.

to me, it would be devastating. we dont want to leave because this is the best place for ALL of us. sorry if me thinking of what is best for my husband and daughter is offensive to you. since they are the ones supporting me in this situation, it is very important to ME for THEM to be 100% comfortable and happy too. it is important to me to have my daughter grow up with the same friends for most of her life. that's just me. you don't have to agree - that is the beauty of different opinions, values, and priorities. and im pretty sure i NEVER once mentioned putting any sort of pressure or guilt on her if i was not accepted to school here? i can't believe you would really even suggest that, especially since it is completely out of the blue. i don't view it that way at ALL and never ONCE said anything to indicate i did. in fact, i feel quite the opposite. things "not working out" would be a reflection on me and my application, not my family.

and yes, it IS an adult decision, and *I* am an adult. my 6 year old daughter is not choosing to stay here; *I* am because *I* believe it is what's best for her. i also believe it's what's best for my husband. my husband has said multiple times he would be willing to move, and if it came down to it, of course we would. however, we all agree that boston is the best place for the three of us both individually and as a family.

 

[pinkzebra]

I'm shooting for the same schedule. I was thinking summer 2011, but I've decided to slow it down and one burn end of the candle as opposed to both.

that is awesome, i really wish you the very best of luck! it would be great if we could both stay here!

 

[EdLongshanks]

to me, it would be devastating. we dont want to leave because this is the best place for ALL of us.

Pink,

You are trying to preach out of the King James Version to attendees of a rave. You are not using language that they can understand or advocating concepts that they can comprehend.

I have moved my family all over the country to accomplish the goals that were important to me at the time. My family as gained a lot from these moves, but they have also cost my family a lot. My sons had a harder time finding girlfriends. As a teenager my daughter has often been frozen out of girl cliques that formed in 1st grade.

But this particular mob of single minded neurotics aren't going to consider that important. We have single-mindedly worked for years to get into some medical school, any medical school, and the idea that we wouldn't go because it might break up a little barbie-friends partnership is unimaginable.

 

[pinkzebra]

Pink,

You are trying to preach out of the King James Version to attendees of a rave. You are not using language that they can understand or advocating concepts that they can comprehend.

I have moved my family all over the country to accomplish the goals that were important to me at the time. My family as gained a lot from these moves, but they have also cost my family a lot. My sons had a harder time finding girlfriends. As a teenager my daughter has often been frozen out of girl cliques that formed in 1st grade.

But this particular mob of single minded neurotics aren't going to consider that important. We have single-mindedly worked for years to get into some medical school, any medical school, and the idea that we wouldn't go because it might break up a little barbie-friends partnership is unimaginable.

i think it's just one of those situations where people can agree to disagree. i was moved in high school from friends i have had since KG and it really messed things up for me. everyone is different and everyone has different opinions on this.

it's not just for any single one of my family members, it is really just what's the best for all. like i said, we have a big support system here. my husband has a really great job, which in this economy, is something to be thankful for. staying in boston will ultimately make our lives easier, so what is the crime in wanting to stay here? while medical school is obviously extremely important to me, as it is for all of us, i also would take great consideration of where id be willing to move my family. if i had gone to med school straight from undergrad as originally planned, we were 100% open to moving anywhere i got in because we looked at it as an adventure. now, though, because my daughter will be older when i hope to start, and because of the length of med school, we want stability for her. i was fortunate enough to land an incredible research position, which is part of the reason why i am postponing my application in the first place. i guess that comes with the territory, though, because now we are really hoping to stay on the east coast instead of being more open to moving anywhere.

i would just hope that even if people have different opinions, they would still be supportive of each other. i dont see how i, nor anyone else on this forum or beyond, should be chastised for thinking of what's best for my family as well as myself.

 

[DoctorIn2015]

Everyone has their own reasons for wanting one medical school over another, whether it is prestige of the institution, comfort with their surroundings, clinical opportunities, or whatever. I, for one, think your reasons for wanting to stay in Boston are probably among the least selfish I have seen among pre-meds. I'm glad you're open to the possibility of going to medical school elsewhere if need be, but I hope you get in somewhere in Boston. Keep your head up, talk to the admissions staff at the schools to see what you can do to make your application more compatible with their desires, and don't let anyone tell you your reasons for wanting to stay in Boston are less important than theirs for wanting to go to Hopkins or whatever. Work for it and I'm sure you'll get it. Good luck!

 

[MCAT guy]

Pink,

You are trying to preach out of the King James Version to attendees of a rave. You are not using language that they can understand or advocating concepts that they can comprehend.

I have moved my family all over the country to accomplish the goals that were important to me at the time. My family as gained a lot from these moves, but they have also cost my family a lot. My sons had a harder time finding girlfriends. As a teenager my daughter has often been frozen out of girl cliques that formed in 1st grade.

But this particular mob of single minded neurotics aren't going to consider that important. We have single-mindedly worked for years to get into some medical school, any medical school, and the idea that we wouldn't go because it might break up a little barbie-friends partnership is unimaginable.