Favorite Quotes of Veterinary School Professors

[DVMDream]

Dem granules.

That is a pink and purple blob... I will call it Jellyfish!

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[WhtsThFrequency]

His name is George.

 

[WildZoo]

 

[Doktor Timo]

"Taking a hamster in for vet med is like trying to refill a disposable lighter."

 

[Doktor Timo]

Bacteriology prof after grading the short answer portion of our first exam: "What your class lacks in knowledge, you definitely make up for in creativity."

 

[Kpowell14]

One of our equine clinicians was speaking about Equine Herpes Myeloencephalitis and how they counsel people going to shows to not share food / water buckets etc.. and then said...

"At the end of the show when everyone is walking through the barn asking to pet the horses - dont be afraid to say No, you cant pet my horse.... Actually - Go Away Fomite!!!"

 

[WhtsThFrequency]

You'd be surprised how often profs can't adult properly.

This is what happens when two pathologists get too excited about Heinlein's "All You Zombies-" over Facebook messenger, and one of them starts running out of English and just....goes there?

 

[Doktor Timo]

I hope one day I have colleagues that I can discuss Heinlein with.

 

[Filly Bay]

Food Animal Professor - "Green grass, nature's laxative"

 

[rd2vetmed]

The lungs get every bit of the CO from the RV (which is all of the blood from the heart). Plus, they get a little bit from the LV. They get over 100% of CO. What is this?? Politics?! No, it's Physiology!

 

[Skimble]

"I always like it in the butt."


(Referring to darting captive wildlife.)

 

[LetItSnow]

Haha great idea.

From today, an ECC professor. "All you need for an EKG is a lead above the heart and a lead below the heart. You can do the fancy smoke over fire thing blah blah...but I'm not XXXXX (badass cardio professor) and I don't care. Get the EKG on, get a rhythm, and do CPR."

I know this is a 2014 quote, but now that I'm out in ER practice ... hells yeah. I don't give a rat's ass if the wave form is upside down, backwards, sideways, or whatever. I can read all those. All I care is that it's reading and I can decide if we're alive, fib, tach, pea, etc. Everything else is for mulling over coffee.

Had a new-ish tech last weekend with a crashed case sitting there doing the "um, ok, smoke over fire, so, uh, <untangles leads> this one goes h-" ... and about that time a more experienced tech grabbed the leads and just flippin' attached them. Made me giggle.

 

[LetItSnow]

equine surgeon: "the definition of a double blind study: two orthopedic surgeons trying to read an ECG"

A longtime classic: How do you hide a $100 from a surgeon? Staple it to the blood work.

 

[LetItSnow]

Dem granules.

That picture looks suspiciously like it came from a textbook.