How to make non-medicine people understand the rigors of medical school?

[osumc2014]

I need your help guys, I have family and friends who just don't understand at all that medical school is quite a bit of work and that after tests, we just need to rest and become zombies. And this is causing a lot of relationship tensions, what is the best way to convey that to them?

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[justaregularmed]

I need your help guys, I have family and friends who just don't understand at all that medical school is quite a bit of work and that after tests, we just need to rest and become zombies. And this is causing a lot of relationship tensions, what is the best way to convey that to them?

Bwhahaha welcome to medical school.

 

[coldweatherblue]

first year you should have enough free-time to spend with friends and family after tests and non-exam weekends. med school can get in the way of relationships; don't let it keep you from college football though cause that's the line..

i've never had a problem telling people "sorry i gotta study/work". Med school actually a really good excuse, you can use it to get out of anything. If people guilt-trip you just say something about having to study for the sake of your medical education.

 

[osumc2014]

first year you should have enough free-time to spend with friends and family after tests and non-exam weekends. med school can get in the way of relationships; don't let it keep you from college football though cause that's the line..

i've never had a problem telling people "sorry i gotta study/work". Med school actually a really good excuse, you can use it to get out of anything. If people guilt-trip you just say something about having to study for the sake of your medical education.

yes I understand that, med school does take away from relationships, Im sure it affects relationships for everyone. I'm just talking about how to best convey how I went from someone who was very care free (senioritis in undergrad) to study all the time and tired and people who aren't around me all the time simply dont understand and think oh he just doesnt wanna spend time with me etc etc. Are there any good resources, like books or articles to get ppl to read?

and no med school aint touching football or basketball! no way no how!

 

[johnmendes]

dude, show them your books. usually works with me. or the 200+ death by powerpoint biochem presentation

 

[dude1344]

Just tell them you cover as much info in a week as they do in a regular university course in a semester.

 

[VoiceofReason]

yes I understand that, med school does take away from relationships, Im sure it affects relationships for everyone. I'm just talking about how to best convey how I went from someone who was very care free (senioritis in undergrad) to study all the time and tired and people who aren't around me all the time simply dont understand and think oh he just doesnt wanna spend time with me etc etc. Are there any good resources, like books or articles to get ppl to read?

and no med school aint touching football or basketball! no way no how!

lol what is wrong with you

 

[namethatsmell]

1) They'll never really understand (nor you should you expect them too)...

2) It's not that big of a deal...just tell them that you gotta be lame and study...work up the self-deprecating humor...people like that...

3) Giving them reading material probably won't be received too well...

If all else fails just ask them to roughly point to the area that the pudendal nerve innervates...and then show off that fancy med school learning you've been working on and edumacate them properly...

 

[Rollo]

Just tell them how much material you cover. And give them numbers, figures, images, etc. Like the guy who earlier said show them the 500+ powerpoint slides or note packets or textbooks, etc. and tell them how many hours you have to put in to go over material once.

It isn't easy to convey non-medical people how much work we have, that's for sure.

 

[21CentSouldier]

I need your help guys, I have family and friends who just don't understand at all that medical school is quite a bit of work and that after tests, we just need to rest and become zombies. And this is causing a lot of relationship tensions, what is the best way to convey that to them?

Have them eat 20 pancakes in 1 sitting. Guarantee they won't bother you again

 

[ACSurgeon]

I need your help guys, I have family and friends who just don't understand at all that medical school is quite a bit of work and that after tests, we just need to rest and become zombies. And this is causing a lot of relationship tensions, what is the best way to convey that to them?

Make them go through medical school. Seriously, they'll never get it otherwise.

 

[ACSurgeon]

I need your help guys, I have family and friends who just don't understand at all that medical school is quite a bit of work and that after tests, we just need to rest and become zombies. And this is causing a lot of relationship tensions, what is the best way to convey that to them?

Oh, and also, make SOME time for family and friends. Unless you are one of the 5% of students struggling to pass, you have no excuse to completely seclude yourself.

 

[osumc2014]

Oh, and also, make SOME time for family and friends. Unless you are one of the 5% of students struggling to pass, you have no excuse to completely seclude yourself.

oh i make plenty of time for close family and friends, it's the ok friends and extended family that feels a little short handed

I like the showing what we are studying thing, that could work, but some are so far out of school they wouldn't understand I guess just gonna have to live with it

 

[Dr McSexy]

I need your help guys, I have family and friends who just don't understand at all that medical school is quite a bit of work and that after tests, we just need to rest and become zombies. And this is causing a lot of relationship tensions, what is the best way to convey that to them?

Don't become a zombie after tests and they shouldn't have to complain much.

 

[osumc2014]

Don't become a zombie after tests and they shouldn't have to complain much.

ya, but that's my studying style and it has been working really well, hmm maybe I ll look into that

 

[FrickenhugeMD]

Show them this... these were my second year notes all put together. Red bull can is there for reference. I read this stack 4 times last year..... ugh

 

[crazycatduncan]

I use the analogy of trying to take a drink out of a fire hose.

 

[Yope]

I use the analogy of trying to take a drink out of a fire hose.

I just use the fire hose.

 

[hrandani]

I just say yo, I'm over 100,000 dollars in debt and almost a decade from being in a position to pay it off. Unless you've got any bright ideas, get the hell out of my way.

And no. They will never understand.

 

[DoctwoB]

Enough with the pity party guys. . It sounds like a bunch of teenage girls whining about how no-one understands them.

Med school is hard. I work/study about 60 hours a week as a MS-1. There's a lot of material. Guess what. Lots of jobs are hard. My buddies working as programmers are working 60+ hours. Friends in finance/Ibanking are working 80+ hours. They're also exhausted when they get off work, and also have had trouble keeping up with friends and family. Yes they get paid well for their efforts, but very few of them will significantly advance beyond this point, and they'll be doing the same thing for years. We get to be friggin doctors when we're done with this. Sure eating the 20-stack of pancakes sucks for the last 10, but the first 10 are delicious.

Just an MS-1 livin the dream.

[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y0a62ZO0mjg[/YOUTUBE]

Please skip to 0:13.

 

[hrandani]

Oh damn. My bad. Everybody shut up and listen to the MS-1. He knows what he's talking about when he tells us to man up. What were we thinking.

Seriously, where does this incredible arrogance come from? Are you one of those guys who never shuts up about their totally irrelevant life experiences in class?

 

[DoctwoB]

Oh damn. My bad. Everybody shut up and listen to the MS-1. He knows what he's talking about when he tells us to man up. What were we thinking.

Seriously, where does this incredible arrogance come from? Are you one of those guys who never shuts up about their totally irrelevant life experiences in class?

First off, the OP is talking about life as an MS-1, so my experience is relevant. And I'm not the arrogant one. What's arrogant is assuming that your suffering in school is so much worse then everyone else's, and that no one else can comprehend just how tough your experience is because they haven't lived it. What's arrogant is assuming you are better then those below you just because you're a year or two ahead of them in education.

Maybe when I'm an MS-3 (2?4?) I'll be as wise as you.

To the OP: sorry if what I said came off as harsh. Med school is tough (especially compared to undergrad), and theres nothing wrong with venting about it now and then. I was just trying to add some perspective and show that in the scheme of things, we've actually got a pretty good deal. I find that explaining medschool is pretty easy. Its like having a full time job where you have major deadlines that often require a lot of work on weekends.

 

[armorshell]

Enough with the pity party guys. . It sounds like a bunch of teenage girls whining about how no-one understands them.

Med school is hard. I work/study about 60 hours a week as a MS-1. There's a lot of material. Guess what. Lots of jobs are hard. My buddies working as programmers are working 60+ hours. Friends in finance/Ibanking are working 80+ hours. They're also exhausted when they get off work, and also have had trouble keeping up with friends and family. Yes they get paid well for their efforts, but very few of them will significantly advance beyond this point, and they'll be doing the same thing for years. We get to be friggin doctors when we're done with this. Sure eating the 20-stack of pancakes sucks for the last 10, but the first 10 are delicious.

Just an MS-1 livin the dream.


Please skip to 0:13.

This post is made of win and awesome.

 

[movax]

Explain that all the studying now is so you don't pull the wrong fleshy red thing out of them fifteen years down the line.

 

[Analytic]

You don't have to explain yourself to anyone. If they won't/can't understand, who cares? If they won't support you, tell them that it upsets you. If they still don't make an effort, stop hanging out with them. This isn't easy to do, but you need to set boundaries with other people so you aren't wasting your energy.

 

[Brigade4Radiant]

Oh damn. My bad. Everybody shut up and listen to the MS-1. He knows what he's talking about when he tells us to man up. What were we thinking.

Seriously, where does this incredible arrogance come from? Are you one of those guys who never shuts up about their totally irrelevant life experiences in class?

Stop being a child. Who do YOU think you are. How dare anyone question the Medical student's life even though many med student's have families. You are in a competitive professional school that you wanted to join. You are not a martyr for going into med school.

 

[Melicopter]

You've already lost.

You needed to move to a city where you know no one, change your phone number, and only call family on holidays. Try to do it right for residency.

 

[Metfan2987]

You honestly just have to be a straight up dick about it. Its the only thing that works. Like every friggin Thursday one of my old college buds calls me and is like "Yo dude, free 2 hour happy hour, 6-8, come through!!" and I'm like "When are you gonna understand I'm doing big things Thursday night?"

 

[dank204]

Just tell them you cover as much info in a week as they do in a regular university course in a semester.

Is this true or exaggerated?

 

[CardiacIntensivist]

Is this true or exaggerated?

Definitely exaggerated. While it's true there is a lot of material, one does not cover the equivalent of one undergrad semester in a week of medical school.

 

[Slack3r]

You are not a martyr for going into med school.

 

[iwumd07]

Have them eat 20 pancakes in 1 sitting. Guarantee they won't bother you again

Have them watch this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R5RapBjos3I

 

[Dr Oops]

Take robbins, drop it on their foot, and then tell them you need to know all of that.

 

[ButImLETired]

Why do you need a strategy? Just tell them the truth.

FWIW, I had a job before med school and while I was tired when I got home, there's no comparison. It's not a matter of "how many hours you put in", it's a matter of what you do with those hours. The mind-numbing boredom and stress of memorizing thousands of pages' worth of info knowing you'll likely forget most of it and have to re-do it 10 times before you get it is very different from sitting in front of a computer among colleagues doing something that often doesnt require 100% silence and focus. Oh and you don't get paid, and don't get weekends off. Sorry dude, not the same thing.

When I was working, I used to look forward to weekends cause I got to see people, hang out, go to restaurants or bars or clubs or whatever. Nowadays that's only the weekends I'm not studying, and every cent I spend is 3 cents I'll have to pay back, and money doesn't renew itself at the end of the month so if I partied too much in September, come December I can't afford Christmas presents. It's just a different approach.

So I think you should just tell people the truth, straight up. Sorry, post-exams I need to be a zombie and even talking to friends is too much mental effort. Hell, I don't have the attention span for a whole movie after a test. People may not "get it", but they'll take it. It's certainly less patronizing than sending them your notes and being like "see what I have to do today??!" Don't insult their intelligence, just tell them what's going on.

 

[osumc2014]

Why do you need a strategy? Just tell them the truth.

FWIW, I had a job before med school and while I was tired when I got home, there's no comparison. It's not a matter of "how many hours you put in", it's a matter of what you do with those hours. The mind-numbing boredom and stress of memorizing thousands of pages' worth of info knowing you'll likely forget most of it and have to re-do it 10 times before you get it is very different from sitting in front of a computer among colleagues doing something that often doesnt require 100% silence and focus. Oh and you don't get paid, and don't get weekends off. Sorry dude, not the same thing.

When I was working, I used to look forward to weekends cause I got to see people, hang out, go to restaurants or bars or clubs or whatever. Nowadays that's only the weekends I'm not studying, and every cent I spend is 3 cents I'll have to pay back, and money doesn't renew itself at the end of the month so if I partied too much in September, come December I can't afford Christmas presents. It's just a different approach.

So I think you should just tell people the truth, straight up. Sorry, post-exams I need to be a zombie and even talking to friends is too much mental effort. Hell, I don't have the attention span for a whole movie after a test. People may not "get it", but they'll take it. It's certainly less patronizing than sending them your notes and being like "see what I have to do today??!" Don't insult their intelligence, just tell them what's going on.

I like that, I think a good chat is needed!

 

[thechad]

post-exams I need to be a zombie and even talking to friends is too much mental effort. Hell, I don't have the attention span for a whole movie after a test.

So what do you do after an exam? Stare at a wall or something?

Take robbins, drop it on their foot, and then tell them you need to know all of that.

Or you can hand them RR path and say, "I need to know most of this, but I'll be a douche and exaggerate everything."

 

[ButImLETired]

So what do you do after an exam? Stare at a wall or something?

Haha well I just took a big exam yesterday, so here's what I did:

Arrived home. Complained about exam questions to classmates on gchat. Ordered a pizza because my kitchen is a disaster. Slept. Woke up. Watched a Bravo show. Slept. Woke up. Ate more pizza. Took an ambien to return to a normal sleep cycle.

Woke up at noon today. Ate leftover pizza. Washed dishes because there's no more pizza left . Watched more Bravo/ TLC. Napped. Watched more tv.

So yeah.....zombie.

 

[shadowfox87]

Hahaha, some students IN med school still don't understand the rigors of med school, so how are you gonna explain to somebody NOT in med school? Honestly, every time I hear someone complaining about how hard something is, I just give them an example of a typical day in my life - that's how.

 

[medstudent87]

Haha well I just took a big exam yesterday, so here's what I did:

Arrived home. Complained about exam questions to classmates on gchat. Ordered a pizza because my kitchen is a disaster. Slept. Woke up. Watched a Bravo show. Slept. Woke up. Ate more pizza. Took an ambien to return to a normal sleep cycle.

Woke up at noon today. Ate leftover pizza. Washed dishes because there's no more pizza left . Watched more Bravo/ TLC. Napped. Watched more tv.

So yeah.....zombie.

sounds like heaven right about now....

 

[2012mdc]

Just tell them it's a full time job that requires extensive weekend work AND that your job performance now will determine what career you will have the rest of your life.

 

[McPoyle]

Why try to convince them of anything, they will never understand how "hard" your life is, just like you will never understand how "hard" their life is. Personally I feel like the people equating this to a full-time job are spot on. If I'm "working" more than 60 hours/week then I am doing something wrong, I need to work on being more efficient. Obviously exam weeks are an exception to this, just as weeks nearing a deadline in any job would be an exception to that rule.

I don't have it any harder, or easier, than any other working sucker... Trying to prove it to them is just a pissing contest.

 

[Dwindlin]

I don't have it any harder, or easier, than any other working sucker... Trying to prove it to them is just a pissing contest.

Close to the best thing I've ever seen written on this forum. Thanks.

 

[thechad]

Haha well I just took a big exam yesterday, so here's what I did:

Arrived home. Complained about exam questions to classmates on gchat. Ordered a pizza because my kitchen is a disaster. Slept. Woke up. Watched a Bravo show. Slept. Woke up. Ate more pizza. Took an ambien to return to a normal sleep cycle.

Woke up at noon today. Ate leftover pizza. Washed dishes because there's no more pizza left . Watched more Bravo/ TLC. Napped. Watched more tv.

So yeah.....zombie.

That sounds like my average saturday...I love saturdays...

 

[mkietu]

I told my family and friends:

"I have to study. There are things that are really important in my life and passing medical school is one of them. Hopefully you guys understand that you're also extremely important, but if I **** this up I **** up a major part and opportunity of my life. So sorry, I'm going to go study now."

I find that saying this once a year gives me peace and quiet to lock myself up in my room for a long time.

 

[2012mdc]

Why try to convince them of anything, they will never understand how "hard" your life is, just like you will never understand how "hard" their life is. Personally I feel like the people equating this to a full-time job are spot on. If I'm "working" more than 60 hours/week then I am doing something wrong, I need to work on being more efficient. Obviously exam weeks are an exception to this, just as weeks nearing a deadline in any job would be an exception to that rule.

I don't have it any harder, or easier, than any other working sucker... Trying to prove it to them is just a pissing contest.

It's a spectrum. I have friends who work 40-50 hours a week and rarely have to do any weekend work and never go in on the weekend. I have other friends who work 70+ at times and go in often on the weekend.

The thing with med school is that in theory you can always study more because you will never know everything so work is never really done.

In explaining it I wouldn't try to "one up" someone else's job or hours.
1st year - you have the most time, just explain when it's exam time
2nd year - just explain Step 1 is the most important test of your life
3rd year - just explain the hours on the bad rotations, see them on the easier ones
4th year - see them when you can during IV season, see them as much as possible afterward

 

[link2swim06]

It's a spectrum. I have friends who work 40-50 hours a week and rarely have to do any weekend work and never go in on the weekend. I have other friends who work 70+ at times and go in often on the weekend.

The thing with med school is that in theory you can always study more because you will never know everything so work is never really done.

In explaining it I wouldn't try to "one up" someone else's job or hours.
1st year - you have the most time, just explain when it's exam time
2nd year - just explain Step 1 is the most important test of your life
3rd year - just explain the hours on the bad rotations, see them on the easier ones
4th year - see them when you can during IV season, see them as much as possible afterward

Really, I was always told 1) first year was the worst and I know for a fact after step 2 is out of the way you do next to nothing 4 year (at least our four years do).

 

[Dr Oops]

So what do you do after an exam? Stare at a wall or something?



Or you can hand them RR path and say, "I need to know most of this, but I'll be a douche and exaggerate everything."

it was a joke. Sorry I had to take you away from your saturday of being locked in your room by yourself.

 

[johnmendes]

the only ones that can understand you are the ones in it with you. I don't see this as a job, medical school and all, we are still being educated, and I honestly believe that there isn't any degree quite as tough as this one, both mentally and physically.

On a side note, i'm just glad my parents are both doctors. they understand me much better

 

[bomgd3]

Haha well I just took a big exam yesterday, so here's what I did:

Arrived home. Complained about exam questions to classmates on gchat. Ordered a pizza because my kitchen is a disaster. Slept. Woke up. Watched a Bravo show. Slept. Woke up. Ate more pizza. Took an ambien to return to a normal sleep cycle.

Woke up at noon today. Ate leftover pizza. Washed dishes because there's no more pizza left . Watched more Bravo/ TLC. Napped. Watched more tv.

So yeah.....zombie.

OMG, that sounds amazing, no joke.

 

[sunset823]

You've already lost.

You needed to move to a city where you know no one, change your phone number, and only call family on holidays. Try to do it right for residency.

Great philosophy. I'm close to my mom and a few old friends I can count on one hand who I keep in touch with regularly, but outside of that, regularly moving to places where nobody knows my name and no drama follows me has worked well.

OP, why do you even talk to your ok friends and extended family??