In a bit of a predicament & need advice!!

[ElizaThornberry]

Hello all,
Last time I posted on here, I technically had zero animal experience, and next to no veterinary experience. While I am happy to say I have some animal experience under my belt now, I have recently come to find out that my boss ( and the owner) at the doggy daycare I work for is actually psychotic. Without going in to too much detail, there is a reason why she has had five name changes. She harassed other dog grooming businesses in the area to the point of obsessively calling/stalking and even poisoned their dogs with antifreeze-laced meat. In retrospect, I should have realized why there is such a high turnover rate at the daycare. I found all of this out because I have been experiencing a hostile work environment. I am getting belittled and blamed for any mistake I make no matter how minor. My hours got cut from about 20 to 8, with no explanation and newer people are getting priority over me. My boss will NOT confront me in person and she only tells me what I do wrong via passive aggressive notes typed up with my name sticky-noted to them. The mistakes I get belittled for are actually due to lack of training on her behalf. I was trained during one weekend for about 10 hours. Other employees get away with things I have gotten chewed out for. I do love the dogs and interacting with them, however I am not being respected or treated like a human being. I also do not want to work for her company anymore because I found out about what she did to those dogs and frankly, she can't run a business. However, I can't just quit because I know if I get on her "bad side", there will be consequences because it seems she plays petty high school games. I just wanted to work with animals, but I do very much regret getting this job. I couldn't have known to have to look up my own boss's criminal history though. I need advice on where to go next....what do I do??? how do I get out of this???

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[MixedAnimals77]

Hello all,
Last time I posted on here, I technically had zero animal experience, and next to no veterinary experience. While I am happy to say I have some animal experience under my belt now, I have recently come to find out that my boss ( and the owner) at the doggy daycare I work for is actually psychotic. Without going in to too much detail, there is a reason why she has had five name changes. She harassed other dog grooming businesses in the area to the point of obsessively calling/stalking and even poisoned their dogs with antifreeze-laced meat. In retrospect, I should have realized why there is such a high turnover rate at the daycare. I found all of this out because I have been experiencing a hostile work environment. I am getting belittled and blamed for any mistake I make no matter how minor. My hours got cut from about 20 to 8, with no explanation and newer people are getting priority over me. My boss will NOT confront me in person and she only tells me what I do wrong via passive aggressive notes typed up with my name sticky-noted to them. The mistakes I get belittled for are actually due to lack of training on her behalf. I was trained during one weekend for about 10 hours. Other employees get away with things I have gotten chewed out for. I do love the dogs and interacting with them, however I am not being respected or treated like a human being. I also do not want to work for her company anymore because I found out about what she did to those dogs and frankly, she can't run a business. However, I can't just quit because I know if I get on her "bad side", there will be consequences because it seems she plays petty high school games. I just wanted to work with animals, but I do very much regret getting this job. I couldn't have known to have to look up my own boss's criminal history though. I need advice on where to go next....what do I do??? how do I get out of this???

For starters I think quitting is going to be your best option. You don't have to give her a reason. Idk what type of town you live in or anything but there are lots of ways to get animal experience-helping out with the county 4H for example. Get shadowing experience for free and then work as something totally unrelated for pay. Other's have way more experience with this than I do so I will let them do most of the talking but definitely doesn't seem like a place I'd wanna stick around.

 

[SkiOtter]

G E T O U T N O W

What kind of consequences can she give you???? Not paying you? Illegal. Physical harm? Incredibly illegal. Bad mouthing you to other businesses? Pretty sure they know she’s crazy and won’t listen to a word she says.

Also, is there some sort of city/state licensing board you can report her to???? I assume she needs some kind of license to own a daycare. If no one tells them, they can do nothing about it.

 

[battie]

Leave. There is nothing she can do to you. Report her to the proper state licensing department and never look back.

 

[ElizaThornberry]

Leave. There is nothing she can do to you. Report her to the proper state licensing department and never look back.

I agree....EXCEPT she has access to my social security number

 

[battie]

I agree....EXCEPT she has access to my social security number

Of course she does. She's your employer. Every employer has access to that. If you're that concerned that this woman is willing to do something with your social security number, then it's at the point of leaving and contacting the police. Social security numbers do not pass go, do not collect 200 dollars. Doing something with someone else's social is a federal crime.

Again, leave in whatever way you think will rock the boat the least. If that means coming up with some lie about a sibling with terminal cancer and spending the rest of their time on a bucket list, do it. Or don't show up to your next shift. Whatever. Submit an anonymous tip to the authorities about your concerns. Keep tabs on your personal info, like finances and such if you think she's going to pull shady shenanigans with your social.

I get the paranoia, I really do. I don't use venmo because I am concerned about hackers. But you're not doing yourself any favors by staying.

 

[CoffeeQuestionMark]

Um, speaking from a point of someone who has been in a very similar situation, quit?

I stuck it out for nearly 6 years because I realized the verbal abuse was tolerable so long as I knew it wasn't personal and everyone is treated the same at first. In fact it did eventually stop and I served as the manager. However there was always this attitude of she (my boss) was the only one that wasn't replaceable, and that the employees had to do everything she said cause she is the one paying us. That is the ONLY place I worked where CONSISTENTLY employees quit by just not showing up. No notice, squat. The same practice of reducing hours to get rid of people was used there. Me being stubborn headed (the same reason I could handle a management role) challenged the authority and would proceed to get a talking to. I actually had quit twice already but asked to come back both times and did. Was taking 17 credits, working 20+ hours a week, and gone 8-13 hours 7 days a week for work/school alone. I got in a fight with her over holiday schedule and decided it wasn't worth it. I said I'd finish the month/holiday season if she promised not to argue anymore otherwise I would not be back.

Well, I was never back.

Best decision I ever made, not once regretted it, and has never come back to bite me in butt.

 

[ElizaThornberry]

Of course she does. She's your employer. Every employer has access to that. If you're that concerned that this woman is willing to do something with your social security number, then it's at the point of leaving and contacting the police. Social security numbers do not pass go, do not collect 200 dollars. Doing something with someone else's social is a federal crime.

Again, leave in whatever way you think will rock the boat the least. If that means coming up with some lie about a sibling with terminal cancer and spending the rest of their time on a bucket list, do it. Or don't show up to your next shift. Whatever. Submit an anonymous tip to the authorities about your concerns. Keep tabs on your personal info, like finances and such if you think she's going to pull shady shenanigans with your social.

I get the paranoia, I really do. I don't use venmo because I am concerned about hackers. But you're not doing yourself any favors by staying.

Since I am solely responsible for the dogs on Sunday mornings, and no one else comes in until 5 pm, I wouldn't want to make the dogs suffer. They would all miss 2 feedings and getting let out 2 times (during the 6 hour shift). However, I come back at 5 too. I might just skip that shift.

 

[CoffeeQuestionMark]

Since I am solely responsible for the dogs on Sunday mornings, and no one else comes in until 5 pm, I wouldn't want to make the dogs suffer. They would all miss 2 feedings and getting let out 2 times (during the 6 hour shift). However, I come back at 5 too. I might just skip that shift.

Give her a heads up. That would be the right and mature thing to do, whether or not you go in.

 

[battie]

Since I am solely responsible for the dogs on Sunday mornings, and no one else comes in until 5 pm, I wouldn't want to make the dogs suffer. They would all miss 2 feedings and getting let out 2 times (during the 6 hour shift). However, I come back at 5 too. I might just skip that shift.

I agree with @CoffeeQuestionMark on letting her know that you won't be there if you decide to quit, regardless of which shift it is. That way appropriate coverage can be found. Either way, I hope you're out of this situation ASAP.

 

[Stroganoff]

I agree....EXCEPT she has access to my social security number

Cool. If she uses your SSN in any way outside of the scope of current employer or soon-to-be former employer (for 2019 tax purposes), then she can become a felon.

Good riddance, just quit. For a toxic, entry-level job like this with no real career implications? Screw the two weeks' notice unless you have a written contract or there would be a danger to the animals or something. [Edit: to be clear, I'm saying it's still a good idea to give advance notice for the sake of the dogs and any co-workers you respect, but two weeks is too generous for a place like this. One shift is generous.]

If she's poisoned animals, how is she still in this field, legally?

If it would help in any way, before you leave, secretly (and legally!) take pictures of any evidence or legally record audio (if in a 1-party state) that would help document anything unethical or illegal that would help support your case to authorities beyond just your word.

 

[DVMDream]

I'd typically agree on this give notice thing but if she's killed dogs I wouldn't want to know what she'd consider doing if you gave her advanced notice you're leaving. I don't typically recommend this but in this case....

Finish the last shift you want to do that makes you feel least guilty then after you leave tell her you are never coming back and that prior shift was your last one. Done. Do not go back. Do not be guilted into going back. Done. Period.

 

[DVMDream]

Most people that commit assault or murder start with animals. She's already done that, I don't care how much you like dogs or your coworkers, if she's really done what you say (I don't think you're lying by any means but I know how rumor mills can start) she could be dangerous.

I don't think any advanced notice should be given in this particular case.

 

[mmmdreamerz]

toxic jobs are the worst. been there done that. get out...I stayed for 5 years and was miserable. don't be me!

 

[ajs513]

Definitely agree with the whole quit without notice thing. Two weeks’ notice is a courtesy for employers to find someone to replace you. It’s not a given that you should uphold in a situation like this. You need to get out. And what could she do with your SSN that you couldn’t have reversed and also trace right back to her? Maybe she’s crazy, but she can’t keep hold of you. Take pictures (legally) as said before, and report her to whoever you’re supposed to report her to. Just get the hell out and start over. A few schools require an employer reference as a LOR. Don’t use her as that obviously, and the longer you stay there, the less time you’ll have to get a LOR from an employer whom you actually respect. That only applies if you apply to those schools (LMU is one), but it’s just a thought.

 

[SkiOtter]

A few schools require an employer reference as a LOR. Don’t use her as that obviously, and the longer you stay there, the less time you’ll have to get a LOR from an employer whom you actually respect.

And uh....this should go without saying, but....definitely check the “do not contact this employer” box on vmcas......

 

[ElizaThornberry]

Cool. If she uses your SSN in any way outside of the scope of current employer or soon-to-be former employer (for 2019 tax purposes), then she can become a felon.

Good riddance, just quit. For a toxic, entry-level job like this with no real career implications? Screw the two weeks' notice even unless you have a written contract or there would be a danger to the animals or something. [Edit: to be clear, I'm saying it's still a good idea to give advance notice for the sake of the dogs and any co-workers you respect, but two weeks is too generous for a place like this. One shift is generous.]

If she's poisoned animals, how is she still in this field, legally?

If it would help in any way, before you leave, secretly (and legally!) take pictures of any evidence or legally record audio (if in a 1-party state) that would help document anything unethical or illegal that would help support your case to authorities beyond just your word.

She was a groomer for years and she left her business. New groomers came in and she felt threatened and harassed them and poisoned their dogs. I found all of this online under her multiple aliases. She actually changed the name of her daycare because if you Google the other name that case would immediately pop up. Anyway, she was never fully convicted because the plaintiffs took to long to present the evidence. You know, because everyone has a right to a fair and speedy trial...

 

[WateryTart]

It's free to put a freeze on your SSN now with all three major credit bureaus. You should do that, and then you won't have to worry. You can temporarily "thaw" your SSN for specific purposes like buying a car, and then put it back into deep freeze. That will prevent any shenanigans using your number.

 

[Minnerbelle]

People like this have many enemies, so unless you escalate things, you likely won’t be much on her radar even if you ghost her. Just don’t make a big deal of it, finish your Sunday shift, and at the end of it just put in your effective immediately notice, block her number and disappear. If you’re only working 8 hrs per week you’re easily replaceable. Pretend like this experience never happened and move on.