Non-traditional students with kids and dental school

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msummar_smc

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I have been reading posts on this board for months now, but thought I would start to join in on the discussions since I'm an aspiring, non-traditional dental student. So HOLA everyone! :D

My question is this: Who here completed or is attending dental school while tending to kids? I have two rugrats, 2 year old boy and 5 month old girl, and would love to here about others experiences balancing dental school and family life. Did anyone have children while they were in school? My wife agrees with my career goals, however, she is apprehensive about going to school with small children (and the possiblity of wanting one more).

Once again, hello everybody ... this place has been a great resource for a non-traditional student like me that is getting back into the swing of school and admissions politics.
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Im a 2nd year dental student and my wife is a 1st year and we have a 5 year old and it is no problem.
 
I'm a first-year student, and my wife and I have a two year old. We are also expecting our second child sometime in the next 4 or 5 days.

It's tough on my wife at times, but we pull through. With my curriculum, I can afford to spend more time at home. Also, I have no plans of really specializing straight out of school, so doing the best I can do is perfectly fine with me. Meaning, I like to stay above the mean, but if I'm not then I'm not crushed. I realize that my scores don't directly reflect the kind of person I am or the kind of dentist I'll be or my ability to learn material nor how bright I am. My scores more perfectly reflect the other responsibilities that I have in my life. I'll fully admit that if I were single I'd be getting all As. But as it stands, spending time with my family is more important to me.
 
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Hey Guys,
I am also interested in this post. I am planning on attending OU this July and have two little girls (4 and 1). I know for me that these responsibilities have made ungraduate work a challange, so I can only imagine how difficult it is going to be in dental school. I do have a very supportive wife (thank goodness). Keep the posts coming. Any advice/inspiration from others who have met the challange of a family and dental school would be appreciated.

BA
OU CLASS OF 2008
 
Hey guys,

I'm single with no kids. No ball and chain for me!!!



Just kidding. I think its really admirable how you guys manage to juggle school and family life. It doenst look easy. Good work!!
 
Going through dental school with kids is very doable but like the others have mentioned the most important thing is support from your wife. I am a second year with a 9 month old and looking to have another soon. It is hard on my wife at times but she is a trooper. I plan to specialize right out of school and my class rank and GPA are at the top of my class. It is all about your priorities, I only watch about 2 hours of TV a week and juggle research and studying for boards along with my classes. It's a TON of work but I believe just about anyone can do it. By the way, my brother is in my class with me and he has 5 kids and still pulls a B average with very little studying. Anything is possible
 
Thanks so much for the responses. It eases my mind, but more importantly it helps to alleviate my wifes fears regarding a good mix of family life and educational commitments.

My situation is so strange. I originally received a BS in Marketing and then rose up to e-Commerce Marketing Manager for the now defunct Service Merchandise (although the founders son purchased the domain name and reopened the company after bankruptcy liquidation). I have battled this 'dental demon' for a few years and now believe the time is right. Thanks again for all the advice. Please feel free to keep it coming since it appears that I'm not the only person in the boat.
 
I have four kids and will be attending dental school this fall. It has been challenging for me to work +40 hours a week and get all my dental prereqs done but we have made it. Just like UNLV said in his post, the TV is rarely on and you become very effecient with your time. I am not sure how it will be in full time dental school compared to how it has been for the last few years working and doing school part time. I will obviously have more studying to do but no full time job to detract me. I am actually hoping to have more time with my family than I do currently.
 
Hi Guys, I'm in the same page that you are. I was wondering if you have really time to study.....on week days, or in the weekend......
thanks a lot
:)
 
I have been around dental education for a long time. There are more and more married students in school thus more and more children involved. Neither marriage nor children seems to be a problem for students. Your spouse needs to understand that you will be very busy and you will probably spend less time together than you like. On the other hand, since there are so many spouses and children around, there is a built in support group. Make sure your spouse understands and agrees to the time demands which will be made on you both. If you both want it, it is very possible.
 
I have two children as well (7 XX and 5 XY), but my situation is different, they don't live with me. Gavin, brought up a great point, I truely believe that I personally would not have as much success in dental school as I have now if my children were living with me and if I was a full time parent. My classmates and I were just talking about that recently. I have many classmates that are parents, balancing between school and parenting can be very challenging, especially if you want to be top 15% of your class and specialize.

I'm not saying it's impossible, but definitely more challenging. I miss my babies very much as we talk on the phone as much as we can, but I'm using this opportunity/situation to work hard and acheive as high as I can get to benefit them down the road.

For those of you (men) out there with children in dental school, man, give props to your wives! As I said before, I have a lot of classmates with children and from what I heard, the wives are doing EVERYTHING!! Making lunch for my classmates, taking care of the children, working to support the family and/or cleaning the apartment/house. Man, these women are amazing!

:clap:

Good luck to you all!
 
Originally posted by Yah-E
For those of you (men) out there with children in dental school, man, give props to your wives! As I said before, I have a lot of classmates with children and from what I heard, the wives are doing EVERYTHING!! Making lunch for my classmates, taking care of the children, working to support the family and/or cleaning the apartment/house. Man, these women are amazing!
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Dude, so true, so true. Props to the wives (and husbands as circumstances apply). One thing I've been blessed with is a great group of students here at ASDOH. The wives' constantly hang out (with or without the kids), and it really is awesome to have my wife and son have lunch with me on campus every single day. Nothing like playing a little football with my son to brighten up my day.
 
wow,

i am so glad that i read this thread. i thought i was gonna be the only one having to go through dental school and having a kid.


i had no idea that there are so many of you in D school with kids. i love this site and it keeps giving me more and more comfort.


Gavin, congratulations on your second one. expecting in 4-5 days? how exciting. keep us posted.
 
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I will be starting UOP this summer and have an eight month old boy. My wife and I are planning on having another shortly after starting. We both know it will be tough and are trying to mentally prepare for it.
Oh yeah, a guy I know has a brother who just graduated or will this year, from Maryland. He matched into ortho at Jacksonville. He and his wife have five kids :wow:
 
I have two children as well (7 XX and 5 XY), but my situation is different, they don't live with me. Gavin, brought up a great point, I truely believe that I personally would not have as much success in dental school as I have now if my children were living with me and if I was a full time parent. My classmates and I were just talking about that recently. I have many classmates that are parents, balancing between school and parenting can be very challenging, especially if you want to be top 15% of your class and specialize.
Click to expand...

I'm not saying it's impossible, but definitely more challenging. I miss my babies very much as we talk on the phone as much as we can, but I'm using this opportunity/situation to work hard and acheive as high as I can get to benefit them down the road.
Click to expand...

Yah-E dont yah think that the thing that would benefit your children the most would be too be more than just a phone call dad? Is your class rank that important that you would alienate yourself from your children so you can do better on your tests?
 
Long story short...mom and babies were going to come down to FL with me and then things didn't work out she got married and now they stayed where they were. I started dental school in FL and I intent to finish in FL. All I can do now is to be a "phone dad". I see them on holidays and breaks and as much as I can afford financially. Would I wanted my babies to be closer to me, of course, but unfortunately, I don't always get what I want.

It's truly unfortunate, but I can only do the best with what I have.
 
I'm not a dental student....but just curious....do you think of all the dental students with families, are there more men doing it than women?

I've always had this theory (unsubstantiated) that when it comes to going back to school, especially for a time consuming professional degree, that more men do it than women. This I always thought stems from the fact that many women still considers themselves the primary caregiver while men sees themselves as the primary breadwinner, hence when choosing such a time intensive task as dental school, more men would find the path easier to digest.

Just curious. Please, no flames as I mean no offense to anyone. :)
 
Oh makes sense YAh-E. Sorry I guess everyone is in differnt circumstances with life and marital status etc etc... Keep up the hard work and good luck getting into your specialty field of choice!
 
I'm not a dental student....but just curious....do you think of all the dental students with families, are there more men doing it than women?
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In my class there are 39 women and around 86 men. So I guess if you just look at the numbers there are more men going into the field than women. My friends wife is in dental hygeine(cant spell) and there are only 2 men in the whole class and the rest are women. The course load is shorter and they get out and can make a nice living with nice benefits. Is it easier than dental school I dont know but I dont think that becoming a dentist is that much harder than getting a hygiene degree. I think that many women see them selfs as mothers and would like a degree in case something happens to there husband. Or maybe they are intimidated by the doctoral higher fields like dentistry and MDs?
 
Originally posted by Yah-E
Long story short...mom and babies were going to come down to FL with me and then things didn't work out she got married and now they stayed where they were. I started dental school in FL and I intent to finish in FL. All I can do now is to be a "phone dad". I see them on holidays and breaks and as much as I can afford financially. Would I wanted my babies to be closer to me, of course, but unfortunately, I don't always get what I want.

It's truly unfortunate, but I can only do the best with what I have.
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Just curious- do you still have to pay child support if the mom gets remarried?
 
Originally posted by Yah-E
Long story short...mom and babies were going to come down to FL with me and then things didn't work out she got married and now they stayed where they were. I started dental school in FL and I intent to finish in FL. All I can do now is to be a "phone dad". I see them on holidays and breaks and as much as I can afford financially. Would I wanted my babies to be closer to me, of course, but unfortunately, I don't always get what I want.

It's truly unfortunate, but I can only do the best with what I have.
Click to expand...

I think Yah-E needs to be commended. Dealing with a separation from you kids is never easy, no matter what the circumstances are. My brother has a 5 year old and a 4 year old and there mother is not present at all. She is a real dirtbag and has not spoken to either child (by her choice) in 4 + years, including missing all birthdays. It would be nice if she had drive like Yah-E and would be a part of their lives. Keep up the hard work Yah-E.
 
Goober:

Yes, child support is still required. Although the mom is now married, I am still the paternal parent of my two children. The only way that my financial obligation (child support) will be terminated is if the step-father formally/legally adopts my two children and I forego my paternal rights. I rather pay the support than to give up my babies!

msummar_smc:

Thanks for your kind words, I appreciate that! My goal, with what I have now, is to let my babies know that I am around and that I love them very much. Speaking of seeing them, I will be picking them up from their mom's and go visit/see my parents over the upcoming spring break in April.

Like I said, I try to see them as much as I can governed by my finances. Living on financial aid and paying child support, it really doesn't give me too much flexibility to buy airline tickets to go back and see them as often as I want to.

Alright, I think it's enough of talking about Andy and his children. Afterall, this was not a thread dedicated to my babies and I. I simply wanted to share that I too have children, but my situation is different since they don't live with me. As result, I can concentrate on my school work much more.
 
Originally posted by ItsGavinC
True, but not before commending those who are going through dental school WITH their kids at their sides.
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I deal with zero kids (except the terrors I've been treating in pedo the past month) but it's probably not easy either way. No need to judge on whose situation is more commendable. You can all have medals for having kids , whether they live with you or not with you, while studying in dental school.
 
i am about to start dental school...i am a female and have a 15 month old and i want to have another one sometime while in school..........is that to much?
 
I was wondering if there is any current female dental students with kids in this forum . Could you please share with us your experience?

I got the impression that it'd be easier for men ( though I don't mean "easy" at all ) to have kids and go to school because they have fully supportive wives behind them. Even when it comes to running a dental clinic, the wife is often the " office manager" behind the scene who handles everything in the office.

any female dentist/ dental student out there with a hubby just as sacrificing as the wives in previous postings?


:clap:
 
I am a female predental student and I must say that a part of me believes that is easier for male students. My husband is a federal agent and travels a lot as well as work over time. It is definately not easy. I still work, clean the house daily and do all the Mom stuff. My grades do suffer and my DAT score was scary, but I refuse to let family not come first. I have been in dentistry for a long time and know that this is my passion. Therefore, no matter what, I don't give up. Unfortunately, I could never see my husband making the kids' lunches or dinner. We might end up in the hospital!! It is nice to hear that there are family oriented students in dental school because that was my greatest fear. Not being able to feel supported by the faculty when it comes to family first. It does however anger me to think that someone would think that females should stick to just hygiene school. Yes, it does make good money but it is the same thing day in and day out.
 
Thank you msummar_smc and everyone who responded! I've been reading the posts for a couple of weeks. My wife and I have a 2 month old little girl. I still have yet to shadow a dentist or start on my prereqs, so I'm not that far along. BUT you all have made getting started a little easier. I've done all the research and reading and now am ready to proceed. Made an appointment last week with my dentist for next week and this thread is further confirmation that it is possible for me to become a dentist without destroying my family. Thank you all :)
 
Originally posted by organic
I was wondering if there is any current female dental students with kids in this forum . Could you please share with us your experience?

I got the impression that it'd be easier for men ( though I don't mean "easy" at all ) to have kids and go to school because they have fully supportive wives behind them. Even when it comes to running a dental clinic, the wife is often the " office manager" behind the scene who handles everything in the office.

any female dentist/ dental student out there with a hubby just as sacrificing as the wives in previous postings?


:clap:
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*struggling violently to suppress my male ego*

Part of me wants to disagree and call you a sexist for saying something like that.

But you are right on organic.

I would be a wreck if my wife wasn't here to take care of me... even if we didn't have kids. I don't know how these single guys survive. :laugh:
 
supernumerary,

you are a very lucky guy!
it's good that you have your wife to help out.

:clap:

My husband actually does most of the house chores too, he cooks, he cleans and he does the laundry....it was even him who taught me how to do proper laundry, cleaning and cooking...:p
 
Originally posted by organic

My husband actually does most of the house chores too, he cooks, he cleans and he does the laundry....it was even him who taught me how to do proper laundry, cleaning and cooking...:p
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good for you Organic. Crack that whip. :laugh:
 
hello to all
I have just gone through this thread it seems very interesting

I am foreign dentist and will be appearing for NBDE 1 in coming july
The only fear i have to join DDS programme is about class schedule, does this is full time school i mean from 9 to5 or more time and those who have kids how u manage it
I am female have two kids 3 and 4 and have all house hold responsibilities
I am afraid if i get admitted into DDS programme can i be able to manage my house and study together


i would appreciate if any one in NYU or any other school share your experiences and advices


thanks
 
My daughter will be about 2 1/2 when I start dental school in Aug. I am single and judging from the previous posts, it seems like I need to get me a wife who will do everything while I'm in school busting my @$$. San Francisco here I come...
 
Are there any single moms out there with kids in dental school?

I am a single mom and originally pre-med but now thinking of switching to pre-dental because dentistry seems much more family friendly. Am I right in thinking this way?

How many hours a week do you spend in class and how many hours do you spend studying a night?

Thanks for everything,
Beckie
 
Are there any single moms out there with kids in dental school?
I am a single mom and originally pre-med but now thinking of switching to pre-dental because dentistry seems much more family friendly. Am I right in thinking this way?

How many hours a week do you spend in class and how many hours do you spend studying a night?
Click to expand...

You are right that dentistry will give you a better lifestyle than most medical specialties after graduation, although that is not necessarily the case during school.

At my school we are scheduled for classes ~32 hrs/week. Add in extra lab time and ~2-3 hrs./night studying and you have yourself one heck of a tough schedule. The upperclassmen tell me it gets better come junior year --- but only after the dreaded sophomore yr. which is supposedly busier than what we have now. :eek: For the life of me, I don't see how that is even possible. :)

Of course there are people who are smarter than me (and less obsessed with grades ;) ) who don't spend so much time studying or working in the lab. That's my experience, hope it helps.
 
Thank you so much!

Take care,
Beckie
 
Originally posted by Dr.SpongeBobDDS
You are right that dentistry will give you a better lifestyle than most medical specialties after graduation, although that is not necessarily the case during school.

At my school we are scheduled for classes ~32 hrs/week. Add in extra lab time and ~2-3 hrs./night studying and you have yourself one heck of a tough schedule. The upperclassmen tell me it gets better come junior year --- but only after the dreaded sophomore yr. which is supposedly busier than what we have now. :eek: For the life of me, I don't see how that is even possible. :)

Of course there are people who are smarter than me (and less obsessed with grades ;) ) who don't spend so much time studying or working in the lab. That's my experience, hope it helps.
Click to expand...
Ditto. We have a similar didactic load to manage, but dents also have to acquire and refine manual skills--after all, we live by our hands as much as by our brains. It's tough, but can be very rewarding.
 
Never mind, I don't want to know your answers.
 
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