justfighton
New Member
- Joined
- Feb 25, 2022
- Messages
- 1
- Reaction score
- 2
Sorry y’all , this is going to be a long read. Sit tight, and thank you in advance for taking the time to read.
I have put myself in a really unfortunate situation. In January, I failed NBDE2 for the FIFTH time. I am so embarrassed and ashamed, amongst all the other feelings I have.
So, I finished dental school way back in 2017 (I know, crazy). I “walked” graduation, passed the WREB, completed everything else and moved back home with my parents. Part 2 was and still is the only thing that has prevented me from getting my diploma. I failed it the first 3 attempts in 2017 (March, July, November). I thought I had all the right resources: released question sets, Tuft’s, Mastery app, Board Vitals, Kaplan test guide, and the freshness of experience from dental school. From then on, it has been a steep, rocky downward slope into deeper depression, anxiety like no other, shame, guilt, and more immense financial struggle.
I went into 2018 taking a mental break from Part 2. I could no longer afford dishing out $600+ to apply for the exam every 90 days, and I was tired of being financially dependent on my parents again since moving back. But, I didn’t want to drift too far away from the exam that I’d never get back to it. So as any new “grad” millennial without a job, I did odd jobs (Lyft driving and DoorDash delivering). Where I lived, the income wasn’t going to afford me moving out and be completely self-sufficient, but it allowed me to stay with my parents and pay for my own living (like roommates).
April 2019, I finally had enough guts for Part 2 attempt #4. I felt “prepared” enough and went in trying to keep a positive mindset throughout the exam. I even finished feeling the most confident yet. Sheesh, I was delusional. And again, I went into depression. I couldn’t get myself to do anything. It was bad.
And then March 2020 happened. As we quarantined, I took it as a sign to get back into it, but at a slow pace, “relearning” topics trying not to let my anxiety and very low, barely there self-esteem spiral into a deep pit. By then, the great and magnificent Dr. Ryan of Mental Dental had gone through most of the Part 2 topics. I felt that this was going to set me up for success. By the time I cover ALL the topics, go over Mosby’s, Tuft’s, and the Mastery app, I thought I was going to be a whole new me ready for the exam. 2020 ended and 2021 came around and I could not get myself to schedule the exam. I kept finding ways to think I wasn’t ready.
If you all were not aware, but there is the policy of 5 attempts within 5 years. So that along with Part 2 discontinuing hovering over my head, I was adding even more pressure to make sure I would get this passed finally. My relationship with my boyfriend was reaching 3 years and he was supportive all while trying to get me to take the damn exam. Our relationship had gone through so many hills and valleys over this exam, finances, and seeing each other all day everyday throughout the pandemic. (Side note: he does not work in healthcare, did not go through with higher education, but rather fulfilled life through the workforce and truly made something of himself with his job now. So he never truly understands, but can only empathize with what I have gone through)
So as the end of 2021 was fast approaching and the economy was reopening, I was feeling pressure to just do it. Now with years of therapy and a couple years on Lexapro, and as much studying I could focus on doing, I finally took Part 2 for the FIFTH time in January. I truly tried my hardest, I paced my time, took my breaks, and spent the whole time for both days. I felt numb going in and leaving it. I did not want to set any expectations or hope or anything that would later affect my mental health, until I saw that “PASS” online.
So here I am, a little over a month after finding out I failed. I don’t know how I feel about this career path anymore, but this is ALL I have ever wanted to do with my life. I never had a Plan B, I have no other skill set for a new path. I think I still want this?
After contacting with ADA, INDBE is my only option. I never thought I would be in this situation. I can’t believe it’s $800+ for the exam. Well, I can since it’s integrated and all, but I absolutely cannot believe I’ll have to once again save up to pay for it. I have now dedicated over $2500 for just Part 2, on top of the obvious dental school debt that has been accruing over the years since 2017.
So, other than finances, how do I get myself to study all over again? I’m overwhelmed with the fact I have to study even more material that I haven’t thought of since Part 1 during school. I don’t know where to even start.
I guess that covers my situation, or the most pertinent information (hah!). So thank you for taking the time to read. Hopefully it all made sense.
I greatly appreciate any advice.
I have put myself in a really unfortunate situation. In January, I failed NBDE2 for the FIFTH time. I am so embarrassed and ashamed, amongst all the other feelings I have.
So, I finished dental school way back in 2017 (I know, crazy). I “walked” graduation, passed the WREB, completed everything else and moved back home with my parents. Part 2 was and still is the only thing that has prevented me from getting my diploma. I failed it the first 3 attempts in 2017 (March, July, November). I thought I had all the right resources: released question sets, Tuft’s, Mastery app, Board Vitals, Kaplan test guide, and the freshness of experience from dental school. From then on, it has been a steep, rocky downward slope into deeper depression, anxiety like no other, shame, guilt, and more immense financial struggle.
I went into 2018 taking a mental break from Part 2. I could no longer afford dishing out $600+ to apply for the exam every 90 days, and I was tired of being financially dependent on my parents again since moving back. But, I didn’t want to drift too far away from the exam that I’d never get back to it. So as any new “grad” millennial without a job, I did odd jobs (Lyft driving and DoorDash delivering). Where I lived, the income wasn’t going to afford me moving out and be completely self-sufficient, but it allowed me to stay with my parents and pay for my own living (like roommates).
April 2019, I finally had enough guts for Part 2 attempt #4. I felt “prepared” enough and went in trying to keep a positive mindset throughout the exam. I even finished feeling the most confident yet. Sheesh, I was delusional. And again, I went into depression. I couldn’t get myself to do anything. It was bad.
And then March 2020 happened. As we quarantined, I took it as a sign to get back into it, but at a slow pace, “relearning” topics trying not to let my anxiety and very low, barely there self-esteem spiral into a deep pit. By then, the great and magnificent Dr. Ryan of Mental Dental had gone through most of the Part 2 topics. I felt that this was going to set me up for success. By the time I cover ALL the topics, go over Mosby’s, Tuft’s, and the Mastery app, I thought I was going to be a whole new me ready for the exam. 2020 ended and 2021 came around and I could not get myself to schedule the exam. I kept finding ways to think I wasn’t ready.
If you all were not aware, but there is the policy of 5 attempts within 5 years. So that along with Part 2 discontinuing hovering over my head, I was adding even more pressure to make sure I would get this passed finally. My relationship with my boyfriend was reaching 3 years and he was supportive all while trying to get me to take the damn exam. Our relationship had gone through so many hills and valleys over this exam, finances, and seeing each other all day everyday throughout the pandemic. (Side note: he does not work in healthcare, did not go through with higher education, but rather fulfilled life through the workforce and truly made something of himself with his job now. So he never truly understands, but can only empathize with what I have gone through)
So as the end of 2021 was fast approaching and the economy was reopening, I was feeling pressure to just do it. Now with years of therapy and a couple years on Lexapro, and as much studying I could focus on doing, I finally took Part 2 for the FIFTH time in January. I truly tried my hardest, I paced my time, took my breaks, and spent the whole time for both days. I felt numb going in and leaving it. I did not want to set any expectations or hope or anything that would later affect my mental health, until I saw that “PASS” online.
So here I am, a little over a month after finding out I failed. I don’t know how I feel about this career path anymore, but this is ALL I have ever wanted to do with my life. I never had a Plan B, I have no other skill set for a new path. I think I still want this?
After contacting with ADA, INDBE is my only option. I never thought I would be in this situation. I can’t believe it’s $800+ for the exam. Well, I can since it’s integrated and all, but I absolutely cannot believe I’ll have to once again save up to pay for it. I have now dedicated over $2500 for just Part 2, on top of the obvious dental school debt that has been accruing over the years since 2017.
So, other than finances, how do I get myself to study all over again? I’m overwhelmed with the fact I have to study even more material that I haven’t thought of since Part 1 during school. I don’t know where to even start.
I guess that covers my situation, or the most pertinent information (hah!). So thank you for taking the time to read. Hopefully it all made sense.
I greatly appreciate any advice.
