-

This forum made possible through the generous support of SDN members, donors, and sponsors. Thank you.
From a male midlevel provider at work when I was cleaning my desk area: “I love it when I see women cleaning.”

Details changed for anonymity, but you get the picture. And yes, he knows I’m a premed.
 
JAK2-STAT3 said:
From a male midlevel provider at work when I was cleaning my desk area: “I love it when I see women cleaning.”

Details changed for anonymity, but you get the picture. And yes, he knows I’m a premed.
Click to expand...

I would have countered with "I love it when I see a replaceable midlevel making comments that help get them replaced".
 
annoyedpsychiatrist said:
I would have countered with "I love it when I see a replaceable midlevel making comments that help get them replaced".
Click to expand...
Haha l like your style! Unfortunately if I had said that I’d be the one getting replaced. This MLP has been at the practice for 10+ years and is adored by our mostly female staff. I did say something back to him but I have to be careful about it. Though being a woman who dared to do something other than spend her life cleaning seems to make quite a statement on its own.
 
JAK2-STAT3 said:
Haha l like your style! Unfortunately if I had said that I’d be the one getting replaced. This MLP has been at the practice for 10+ years and is adored by our mostly female staff. I did say something back to him but I have to be careful about it. Though being a woman who dared to do something other than spend her life cleaning seems to make quite a statement on its own.
Click to expand...

Well you're a medical student so you're right that unfortunately you're the one that would get in trouble for any kind of comment. I remember those days.

Im an attending, if i heard someone say that I would definitely put the staff in their place for that. When I was a resident I did notice that female medical students were often treated a different way and I am pretty empathetic to that after seeing what a few dealt with. Plus im a psychiatrist so being around disinhibited people and staff working with disinhibited people, you witness all kinds of comments. You would think in this kind of setting cat calling wouldn't be such a big deal but unfortunately seems to still be a problem. As a physician you will likely spend a lot of time cleaning up, after the messes that providers like these often make.
 
annoyedpsychiatrist said:
Well you're a medical student so you're right that unfortunately you're the one that would get in trouble for any kind of comment. I remember those days.

Im an attending, if i heard someone say that I would definitely put the staff in their place for that. When I was a resident I did notice that female medical students were often treated a different way and I am pretty empathetic to that after seeing what a few dealt with. Plus im a psychiatrist so being around disinhibited people and staff working with disinhibited people, you witness all kinds of comments. You would think in this kind of setting cat calling wouldn't be such a big deal but unfortunately seems to still be a problem. As a physician you will likely spend a lot of time cleaning up, after the messes that providers like these often make.
Click to expand...
Actually I’m a current applicant and don’t have an acceptance yet. Believe me, I am looking forward to the day I get to look this guy in the eye and tell him I got into medical school (if I get in). Ironically, the (all male) physicians I work with have been nothing but supportive. But I know that s*** like this will be there for my whole career.
 
JAK2-STAT3 said:
Actually I’m a current applicant and don’t have an acceptance yet. Believe me, I am looking forward to the day I get to look this guy in the eye and tell him I got into medical school (if I get in). Ironically, the (all male) physicians I work with have been nothing but supportive. But I know that s*** like this will be there for my whole career.
Click to expand...
Inappropriate comments and bullying are tenaciously present in medicine, although not as common as they used to be. Being excellent is the greatest deterent to this, that's according to Oprah. I believe my wife experienced very little of these situations for this reason. People aren't perfect, and some may believe their comments innocent. Doesn't mean you have to put up with it. Report it or let it roll off your back. This gives you the power., not the commenter.
 
BlackLotus95 said:
"Aren't you worried about your husband?" with additional comments implying my husband will cheat on me if I become too wrapped up in a career. To be fair, this was on base and the military is very traditional about marriage roles sometimes. 😅
Click to expand...

Yikes, I'm sorry that was said to you!

I'm a lady and hate the "But what if you want to have kids?" comments. They wouldn't say that to a man but it happens to female premeds all the time. It happened to my lab partner on Monday!
 
Last edited:
RespectTheChemistry said:
Yikes, I'm sorry that was said to you!

I'm a lady and hate the "But what if you want to have kids?" comments. They wouldn't say that to a man but it happens to female premeds all the time. It happened to my lab partner on Monday!
Click to expand...

ugh that would be annoying to hear. Back when I was a resident, the chief resident of the class above me had 5 kids (2 of which she had during residency). Her husband was a stay at home husband so that definitely helped. I have a puppy and I find him exhausting enough...

A lot of places are becoming more accepting of stuff like maternity leave. the current hospital system im an attending at even has multiple employee daycare programs. But I suppose in some people's minds being a mother and doctor are mutually exclusive, lol
 
RespectTheChemistry said:
Yikes, I'm sorry that was said to you!

I'm a lady and hate the "But what if you want to have kids?" comments. They wouldn't say that to a man but it happens to female premeds all the time. It happened to my lab partner on Monday!
Click to expand...
Hit em with the "Actually I'm infertile" and maybe they'll learn why it's not appropriate to ask that question to people. With my health stuff being what it is, I find it baffling that people are so forward about the topic of children. What if you've had miscarriages? What if it's a sore subject? It's not only rude but deeply personal to just bring up to someone you've just met or know only casually. But I'm sure the times are a-changing with 50%+ of med students being women now.
 
Goro said:
Back to the OP's question, I have used this line very rarely:
"The only way you'll get into a medical school is either as a standardized patient, or a cadaver"

I only use it on extremely dysfunctional SDNers.
Click to expand...
What kind of GPA/ECs are they looking for in SPs and cadavers? Seems like there's always still a chance..
 
RespectTheChemistry said:
Yikes, I'm sorry that was said to you!

I'm a lady and hate the "But what if you want to have kids?" comments. They wouldn't say that to a man but it happens to female premeds all the time. It happened to my lab partner on Monday!
Click to expand...
My response would be, " I'll manage just like all the other lady Doctors have done for 120 years."
 
BlackLotus95 said:
Hit em with the "Actually I'm infertile" and maybe they'll learn why it's not appropriate to ask that question to people. With my health stuff being what it is, I find it baffling that people are so forward about the topic of children. What if you've had miscarriages? What if it's a sore subject? It's not only rude but deeply personal to just bring up to someone you've just met or know only casually. But I'm sure the times are a-changing with 50%+ of med students being women now.
Click to expand...

*hugs* I'm sorry, love. It brings up grief issues for me too when people ask about that for a different reason.

That's not rare at all though! 1 in 7 couples deal with infertility. 25% of pregnancies end in miscarriage. It's so deeply personal, but people can have such poor boundaries with asking about people's childbearing plans.
 
Last edited:
Idk if this counts bc I received this comment when I was accepted to medical school, but didn't start yet.... "so you're studying to be a nurse, right?" when I told them I'm going to med school. Yes, I am a woman 😛

It just grinds my gears bc most of the male physicians I've worked with have insisted I should think about my future husband and my future child and how medical school might impact me as a mother lool.
 
RespectTheChemistry said:
Yikes, I'm sorry that was said to you!

I'm a lady and hate the "But what if you want to have kids?" comments. They wouldn't say that to a man but it happens to female premeds all the time. It happened to my lab partner on Monday!
Click to expand...
This happened to me SO MANY TIMES when I was a premed, esp by older male physicians. I'm a medical student now, but my male classmates are very very supportive and incredibly encouraging. Have not heard a single comment about marriage or children since I started medical school.
 
I had a lady tell me the only reason I would get into medical school is because of my ethnicity (i'm hispanic). Just before she said this I had stopped and mentioned that if her daughter (who was premed) needed any help I was happy to lend her some. They were from Eastern Europe.

Her daughter ended up with a 500 on the MCAT while I landed a 519.
 
crochetting_saladgal said:
You go queen!!!!


When I was volunteering in a clinic-- one of the patients there assumed that I was married based on my ethnicity and age, and when I said I wasn't they started making derogatory comments about how people of my ethnicity get married young and how he would mary me. I was 16...
Click to expand...
I hope that you broke his nose!
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top