Thanks for the support everyone. It's been very cathartic to share my story on here and know that almost every one agrees with how ridiculous the whole thing is.
In regard to the previous post, there are a couple of things to clarify.
I'm not too sure how to go about doing what you said in regard to getting the rad onc program to agree to start me 45 days after starting pgy-2 year in radiology. just communicating with a program while having a contract with another program is a match violation. (so i kinda did like 3 violations when I applied, interviewed, AND accepted the position
If the 45 day option would have been presented to me of course I would have jumped on that, no questions asked. The real way to avoid a match violation in my case would have been to get a waiver from the NRMP BEFORE applying for the position at the rad onc program. I have confirmed this with the NRMP policy director on the phone in multiple conversations- they would have granted me the waiver and even AFTER the whole match violation was brought to light, they still were going to grant me the waiver. i just didnt want the waiver anymore because my only option was to be unemployed.
The reason I am not allowed to go the rad onc program, even after 45 days, is that i committed a match violation. and the nrmp found out. so right now my case in under investigation (and according to an email i received yesterday, should be decided hopefully this week) and i will MOST LIKELY get a penalty that lasts at least 1 year. during this year I cannot:
1)re-enter the match
2) take any position outside of the match at ANY instituiton affiliated with the NRMP (so that includes my internal medicine residency.)
so what i will probably end up doing is reapply in rad onc as soon as I can. or possibly come back to my current IM program after my "penalty year(s)(not the best program ever, but I'm pretty happy and it happens to be in my home city) and doing heme onc.
if my radiology PD makes things awkward or treats me in any way unfairly, you better believe I will be ass out the door in 45 days. no questions asked. i guess i could always get a research job or moonlight (passed step 3 so i guess I'm licensed right?) for the remained of the year.
i'll update the thread if any major turn of events happens.