Analyzing EtOH

[deschutes]

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I have a confession to make - I've never understood the attraction of alcohol. 😳

I tasted beer when I was quite young (I think it was an Anchor) - even then I hated the bitterness and the bite. I much preferred the taste of Anglia. And even then I'd never finish the entire can. I like the fizz more than the alcohol.

I suppose I think of alcohol the way I think of drugs and free love and all those glorious things that young people crave. I don't care what other people do nor do I censure them for it - I just don't like it for myself.

Not trying to be righteous or anything ******ed like that; I just never liked the idea of being "not myself".

I can have two glasses of Sancerre and a glass of a South African red at dinner and nothing ridiculous happens. Thing is, I end up buzzed like I always do and can't sleep for ages. I don't like that. I don't like being all warm and stupid giggly. I'd rather achieve that on my own, without the help of some silly drink.

I've had much pleasanter experiences with tea and biscuits than with alcohol. I couldn't be an alkie if I tried.

So that is my non-alcoholic life.

Is there any help for me? 🙁

 

[cytoborg]

Run, deschutes, run. They can smell the blood.

 

[cytoborg]

😀 Seriously though. For some people it's an acquired taste, and some people just never get into it. Beer is probably not the best way to start out for a lot of people who aren't used to the taste, and might have given you the wrong impression. Try a nice cranberry and vodka to start, and see if you like that.

 

[deschutes]

(cytoborg, shhhh!! this is part of my grand plan to have people buy me EtOH +++ in N'orleans and you're wrecking it!)

 

[cytoborg]

(cytoborg, shhhh!! this is part of my grand plan to have people buy me EtOH +++ in N'orleans and you're wrecking it!)

(Oops! Sorry! 😉 )

 

[b&ierstiefel]

yeah, alkies don't make drinkin plans for the next year. usually the subject of most concern for an alky is the next alcohol fix in the most immediate future.

 

[deschutes]

toldja I wasn't an alkie.

 

[cytoborg]

Hmm, yep, you're right. Just raided the fridge = nothin. Must run to store.

DOH! In this land of Oz the alcohol is kept under lock and key by the government, and is not available on Sundays, as all good god-fearin folk should be in church today.

 

[b&ierstiefel]

Hmm, yep, you're right. Just raided the fridge = nothin. Must run to store.

DOH! In this land of Oz the alcohol is kept under lock and key by the government, and is not available on Sundays, as all good god-fearin folk should be in church today.

8 newcastles in the fridge. too bad i'm not at home....workin' at lab with a bad case of the shakes.

 

[geddy]

I have a confession to make - I've never understood the attraction of alcohol. 😳

I tasted beer when I was quite young (I think it was an Anchor) - even then I hated the bitterness and the bite. I much preferred the taste of Anglia. And even then I'd never finish the entire can. I like the fizz more than the alcohol.

I suppose I think of alcohol the way I think of drugs and free love and all those glorious things that young people crave. I don't care what other people do nor do I censure them for it - I just don't like it for myself.

Not trying to be righteous or anything ******ed like that; I just never liked the idea of being "not myself".

I can have two glasses of Sancerre and a glass of a South African red at dinner and nothing ridiculous happens. Thing is, I end up buzzed like I always do and can't sleep for ages. I don't like that. I don't like being all warm and stupid giggly. I'd rather achieve that on my own, without the help of some silly drink.

I've had much pleasanter experiences with tea and biscuits than with alcohol. I couldn't be an alkie if I tried.

So that is my non-alcoholic life.

Is there any help for me? 🙁

Where's LADoc when we need him?

 

[deschutes]

Where's LADoc when we need him?

I do believe he's actually got me on his Ignore list 😀

 

[b&ierstiefel]

I do believe he's actually got me on his Ignore list 😀

awwww...do you miss him?

 

[deschutes]

awwww...do you miss him?

Terribly 😉

Are you jealous now?

 

[b&ierstiefel]

Terribly 😉

Are you jealous now?

why would i be jealous about that?

 

[geddy]

You two are so cute. (Psst... Andy - try getting her loaded before making the moves. Those shots will really sneak up on her).

 

[Gut Shot]

DOH! In this land of Oz the alcohol is kept under lock and key by the government, and is not available on Sundays, as all good god-fearin folk should be in church today.

Yeah, praying for Monday morning to arrive soon so that the Schlitz may once again flow with abandon.

 

[deschutes]

You two are so cute. (Psst... Andy - try getting her loaded before making the moves. Those shots will really sneak up on her).

geddy. Read my lips. Nothing. Ridiculous. Happens.

 

[geddy]

Yeah, praying for Monday morning to arrive soon so that the Schlitz may once again flow with abandon.

Wow, Schlitz... I prefer Red Lable, myself.

 

[b&ierstiefel]

Yeah, praying for Monday morning to arrive soon so that the Schlitz may once again flow with abandon.

yeah, i'm bringin' my Remy Martin XO into the lab on Monday and openin that **** up IF and ONLY IF I get an email saying that I did indeed match.

 

[cytoborg]

yeah, i'm bringin' my Remy Martin XO into the lab on Monday and openin that **** up IF and ONLY IF I get an email saying that I did indeed match.

Mmmm....feeling thirsty...reaching into fridge...DOH! 😡

 

[Gut Shot]

Thing is, I end up buzzed like I always do and can't sleep for ages. I don't like that. I don't like being all warm and stupid giggly. I'd rather achieve that on my own, without the help of some silly drink.

Your problem is that you're quitting too soon. You need to keep drinking, harder and harder, until your mind reaches the edge of an internal abyss that beckons to smother the pain of your existence. I recommend Mezcal in Gatorade.

 

[geddy]

Hey, wait a minute, deschutes - didn't you post a while ago that you "whished you had a Pinot Noir"? So, do you drink wine, then?

 

[geddy]

Your problem is that you're quitting too soon. You need to keep drinking, harder and harder, until your mind reaches the edge of an internal abyss that beckons to smother the pain of your existence. I recommend Mezcal in Gatorade.

For sheer endurance, I'd recommend a shot of "Dead Nazi" - Rumpleminz and Jagermeister. Tastes like cough syrup.

 

[deschutes]

Evidently my original post was too long.

I can have two glasses of Sancerre and a glass of a South African red at dinner and nothing ridiculous happens.

Havarti666, I deal with the pain of my existence with chocolate 😛 Preferably Bernard Callebaut dark.

 

[geddy]

Evidently my original post was too long.


Havarti666, I deal with the pain of my existence with chocolate 😛 Preferably Bernard Callebaut dark.

Doh! 2 pieces of advice - drink without eating, and drink the wine faster.

 

[Gut Shot]

For sheer endurance, I'd recommend a shot of "Dead Nazi" - Rumpleminz and Jagermeister. Tastes like cough syrup.

Very nice. Add an equal part Bacardi 151 and you have a "Liquid Cocaine," for those times you want to bypass buzzed and blitzed and head straight to blotto.

 

[Gut Shot]

Havarti666, I deal with the pain of my existence with chocolate 😛 Preferably Bernard Callebaut dark.

Chocolate martinis, then. Drink 'em until you can't find your credit card.

 

[geddy]

Very nice. Add an equal part Bacardi 151 and you have a "Liquid Cocaine," for those times you want to bypass buzzed and blitzed and head straight to blotto.

I thought you needed powdered milk to get blotto.

 

[deschutes]

Doh! 2 pieces of advice - drink without eating, and drink the wine faster.

*whines* but it's tart, and it burns.

It's not like say, gulping Tropicana Grape where nothing gets in the way.

 

[deschutes]

Chocolate martinis, then. Drink 'em until you can't find your credit card.

Oooh! *perks up* You are serious? Where can I find these?

 

[b&ierstiefel]

New Orleans is gonna be fun.

 

[deschutes]

yeah you get your book and your beer.

 

[Gut Shot]

Oooh! *perks up* You are serious? Where can I find these?

Any martini bar worth its salt. Or you can make your own.

1 1/2 shots Godiva® chocolate liqueur
1 1/2 shots creme de cacao
1/2 shot vodka
2 1/2 shots half-and-half

Mix all ingredients in a shaker with ice, shake and pour into a chilled cocktail glass.

 

[geddy]

Any martini bar worth its salt. Or you can make your own.

1 1/2 shots Godiva® chocolate liqueur
1 1/2 shots creme de cacao
1/2 shot vodka
2 1/2 shots half-and-half

Mix all ingredients in a shaker with ice, shake and pour into a chilled cocktail glass.

I think you just changed her life forever.

 

[geddy]

*whines* but it's tart, and it burns.

It's not like say, gulping Tropicana Grape where nothing gets in the way.

What, you have never tried Mad Dog 20/20?

 

[b&ierstiefel]

I think you just changed her life forever.

Yes, there is hope for her...she will be an alky soon.

 

[deschutes]

What, you have never tried Mad Dog 20/20?

No.

*Googles*

 

[beary]

Any martini bar worth its salt. Or you can make your own.

1 1/2 shots Godiva® chocolate liqueur
1 1/2 shots creme de cacao
1/2 shot vodka
2 1/2 shots half-and-half

Mix all ingredients in a shaker with ice, shake and pour into a chilled cocktail glass.

I almost never drink but this sounds delicious. I must head down to a martini bar and get one. Right now.

 

[deschutes]

Oh my. Traffic lights.

I think I favour the chocolate at this point. How do I find a martini bar?

 

[deschutes]

Maybe I should clarify that last question. How do I tell a martini bar from any other bar?

 

[Gut Shot]

Maybe I should clarify that last question. How do I tell a martini bar from any other bar?

Internet, yellow pages, word of mouth. Go to the nearest bar and ask the bartender. Every city has a subculture of bartenders and waitstaff that know each other, and know where to go for various purposes.

 

[Gut Shot]

I think you just changed her life forever.

Yes, in the same way that the Europeans changed the lives of the American Indians forever.

 

[b&ierstiefel]

Yes, in the same way that the Europeans changed the lives of the American Indians forever.

Yeah, I heard Chief Runningwater was really pissed when that happened.

 

[bananaface]

I learned how to pass the blood alcohol test in class on Wednesday. I have no urge to drive hammered, though. It hurts enough when I hit my head on the wall walking to the bathroom.