awkward situation...

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wannabadr10

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I did research last summer, and the doctor told me at the conclusion of my project that he would write me an outstanding letter of recommendation. I contacted him in late January of this year to ask if he was still willing to write me a letter. He agreed but has yet to write the letter. I contacted him about twice through email, once over the phone and I even drove to his office to speak to him in person over the course of the last ~5 months. I know that he is busy writing grants which he told me during our quick meeting, but he promised he would find the time to write the letter. Should I just give up on this letter? I don't want piss him off and he ends up writing me a negative letter. Secondly, will it come up in the interview? Like..."why didn't any of your research mentors write a letter for you?" Thanks for any help!
 
I think your best bet is probably just to bring up those concerns to him in as polite as manner as possible. How soon do you plan on submitting your letters? I think if he liked you as much as you say, you can just tell him that you really don't mean to badger him and understand that he's very busy, and even mention your concern about changing his impression of you by being too persistent. If he's aware that you're not just being paranoid and over-anxious, I sincerely doubt he would suddenly decide that you're not worthy of a good letter.

This is just my first impression of the situation, hopefully some other people can include their input cause for all I know my idea is really dumb. 😛
 
You could try to visiting him in person again. He could simply be really busy. But be polite at all times.
 
Your situation is not uncommon. This happens to me too. Professors and bosses are meant to procrastinate in writing letter of recommendations because they are always busy. When they are not busy, they would rather do something else than writing a letter of recommendation for you.

In my experience, the best way to request letter of recommendation from these people is to give them a deadline. I like to set the deadline within 2 weeks from the day I asked. This is so because you can ask him for updates regarding the progress of your LOR after a week. Asking for update serves to remind him about your urgency of the LOR. If you set the deadline to be within a week, I think it's a little too short. If you set it to a month, they will probably forget. So tell them that you really need it within 2 weeks in order to submit your Med school application.

Oh, another thing that works for me may also work for you. After one week, I simply slide a thank you card through his door for writing me an LOR. After two days, I received an email from the procrastinated professor that he finally wrote my LOR and it was mailed out.

Hope these helps.
 
sometimes oyu do need to harass them. for one of my LOR's I had to sit outside his office in the lab for 3 horus waiting for him to write it. he was about to leave for the day, just walked out of the office and saw me sitting there; he asked when the deadline was and i said today and only then he went back into the office and wrote the letter.
 
i do not mean harass in any violent or not polite way.. be polite at all times.
 
sometimes oyu do need to harass them. for one of my LOR's I had to sit outside his office in the lab for 3 horus waiting for him to write it. he was about to leave for the day, just walked out of the office and saw me sitting there; he asked when the deadline was and i said today and only then he went back into the office and wrote the letter.

These tactics sometimes actually work. I did that too to atleast two of my professors. Though it only works if you are very frank w/ your professors.
 
Yes, big is correct in that doctors don't place these things on a high priority, especially if it's for a premed. I asked 5 different physicians whom I've shadowed and worked with for a letter of recommendation. All of them agreed to write one. So far, only one has turned in his letter. I don't know when the rest of them will be in but when I call their office, their secretary always says that they're on vacation or away on conference. I've already given up on them being able to turn in their letters. Be prepared for this when you go to medical school and residency when you ask them for a letter to apply to a residency or fellowship program.
 
I'm in a similar situation. I have asked the doc for the letter for like at least 4-5 times in person, everytime he told me he would write it ASAP but now I feel like I won't get it anyway.
 
...maybe try one more time, but it sounds about time you implemented Plan B. When it comes to these medical school LORs, ALWAYS approach 1-2 more people than you need 1-2 months sooner than you think you should. More likely than not, something for someone will always come up. Happened to me this year, and with no notice and no call. However, thank God, my Plan B's panned out. 👍
 
I can't believe getting a letter of recommendation is so hard. I understand they're busy, but when I give my word I mean it. It's of extremely poor character to promise a letter but never write it or only write it after begging for weeks. Hopefully I won't have such a bad time when it's my time to get letters.
 
I can't believe getting a letter of recommendation is so hard. I understand they're busy, but when I give my word I mean it. It's of extremely poor character to promise a letter but never write it or only write it after begging for weeks. Hopefully I won't have such a bad time when it's my time to get letters.


Well you have to understand how much other obligations they have. I mean besides seeing patients and dictating their check up, which might take up 50-60 hours of their week, they might have to spent 10 hours training residents and doing grand rounds, then they might have to devote 10 hours supervising their research projects prepping for publications and conferences. One physician told me that he gets about 200 e-mails per day requesting information about patient referrals. So yeah, getting a recommendation letter probably isn't going to be high on their priority list what with everything else on their plate.
 
I'm in a similar situation. I have asked the doc for the letter for like at least 4-5 times in person, everytime he told me he would write it ASAP but now I feel like I won't get it anyway.

i think i read somewhere that it helps push LOR-writers along if you make a draft of a letter and show them, and just ask them to improve/personalize it, then the hard work is done for them. also, if they don't show you what they edit before they send it out, then it still follows the "rules" of the privacy of the LOR.

has anybody else had any luck with this?
 
i think i read somewhere that it helps push LOR-writers along if you make a draft of a letter and show them, and just ask them to improve/personalize it, then the hard work is done for them. also, if they don't show you what they edit before they send it out, then it still follows the "rules" of the privacy of the LOR.

has anybody else had any luck with this?

I don't think you should actually pre-write your own letter and give it to the recommender. That sounds rather impetuous to me. You should ask the professor first before you do such a thing.
 
i think i read somewhere that it helps push LOR-writers along if you make a draft of a letter and show them, and just ask them to improve/personalize it, then the hard work is done for them. also, if they don't show you what they edit before they send it out, then it still follows the "rules" of the privacy of the LOR.

has anybody else had any luck with this?


Sounds like my plan when I start asking for LORs. It makes it easier for them to write something special. It leaves more brain power for the actual material in the letter.

On the other hand, you could be strategically aggressive. But, don't run into the hospital with a bat, yelling, "WRITE ME MY LETTER H**!"
 
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